The START 2021 STRONGER Challenge [CLOSED]

Totally agree with this analysis.
It has to be down to the individual concerned as to what constitutes a relapse.

For me, the rule is to avoid PMO. However, while certain TV shows, and movies are /Technically/ ok, I find I have to avoid them also because of triggering content that opens my mind to wanting more. Similarly with G-Subs, G-Pics, I find that even though a particular image may not be triggering, I will end up viewing image after image after image to completely saturate my mind with pixellated potential partners, and this in itself is a supranormal stimuli that gets my dopamine on a false high.

When my dopamine is unnaturally heightened like this, I will enjoy the feeling so much that I'll seek out P and then start to M, then its a foregone conclusion that I'll O to avoid bluebells.

Then after first O it becomes very easy to repeat the process every day, until I get sick and tired of being in the relapse and begin to drag myself up by my bootstraps to get on the recovery wagon.

So my personal attitudes and understandings of this disease are formed after many experiences.

I hope this helps someone.

 

Day 18 - been so tempted. Tons of P imagery in my addict brain these last few days. Feeling stressed.

 

One trick is to talk out loud about your thoughts or to whisper them or write them down on paper and tear the paper up. This gets the thoughts out of your mind

 

Day 6 - 3th October 2020

Somewhat ended up sleeping late again yesterday and thus wasted half of the day and ended up not having time to study efficiently. I just finished planning my studies for the next 2 year and where i want to see myself in life which is to have the grades to apply for a master program. So I will need to work hard and be diciplined.

Also wanted to share something that happened today,

Spoiler: relapse warning

I accidently was came accross a porn image with naked ladies, and didn't have any movement from down there. Thats where i am today after years of porn abuse. I still remember one of my last sexual encounter where i couldn't perform because of PIED. Anyway, thats what im here trying to fix or cure alongside with many things.

 

@BrohkenCompass

You know, the idea of starting the counter before New Year is a good one. One of the reason many people break their new year resolution like starting going to the gym is because they go into the new year with an unprepared mentality, or simply not the right mentality and thus fail. Starting our nofap streak now before the year prepares us for the challange when it finally starts.

Edit: Or i think i missread the title or the first post on thread. I thought this was for the 2021 challange but that we started earlier from now September. It wouldn't be a bad idea because those who succeed to not relapse till new year will also have a high succeed rate once new year starts as they continue on with this challange and try to make it through 2021 also.

 

Hey, I just read through the recent threads.
I just wanted to reminded all of us that we ARE doing a good job.

It's so easy to beat ourselves up over one thing or another, I see some of that in this group.
But we are all making progress.
For me, that reminder brings me back to a calmer place and helps me keep going.

Day 11.

 

Give me a strike.

I am very upset about my actions over the past 24 hours, but it has given me more clarity with what it is that I am actually trying to accomplish here.

First off, I was worshiping the mighty counter and my own pride. Yesterday I started failing the wife test, something that I could recover from. Today, I was deep into the funnel of psubs. Naked women, some sex scenes. This was clearly a reset, but I figured that since I did not PMO, I could still motor on.

I decided to be honest with myself and admit I failed. I failed in keeping the real goal of this challenge before me. I can now still attain 99 days by 2021, but if I still think the same way, January will not be a good month.

My goal remains the same, to become that person who does not need to use porn. I now have 99 days to become that person.

I wrote out my thoughts on this thinking maybe there are others that may find this helpful.

 

Day 10... Although I am very far from a relapse this day was truly wasted.

 

Day 8

 

It's my day 43
But urges are increased.
Yesterday night I don't know how but I went from a triggered feeling from YouTube (it was ss sniper wolf) then I don't know how I started watching stupid pranks...
Then it went further to watching wwe divas fights. But I wasn't aware that I was slipping into wrong things. I was getting heaviest urges by watching that wwe divas.
But I didn't relapsed because it was late night and I was on bed about to sleep. I kept my phone away and slept


Why I am getting urges again, I have came so far already, even at this point why urges are there???

 

Damn, ended up relapsing. Not sure how it really happened, one thing just sort of led to another and next thing i knew i had god knows how many tabs of hentai and porn on my computer. Still my longest streak to date though, and that shows that things are improving, so I'm proud. Of course the goal is completely cutting out pmo, but once in a week is better than 12 times in a week, so its progress.