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help!! really strong urges..very close to giving up and fapping

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by neew_guy, Jul 1, 2015.

  1. neew_guy

    neew_guy Fapstronaut

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    Help plz..last 2-3 days I have been getting very strong urges to fap..today I got a rock hard erection while bathing, just thinking about girls and without even touching myself. .but I dont want to go back to PMO again at least for 90 days ..I need this reboot. .how can I fight off these urges??
     
  2. g2stop

    g2stop Fapstronaut

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    go for a run, just do something else and get out of the place where you fap
     
    neew_guy likes this.
  3. neew_guy

    neew_guy Fapstronaut

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    I try..I am out of my house for 12 hours a day..but its so hard to control at night..and now i also dont know if I am even going to get better..dont know if this is helping me or not..what if after 90 days nothing changes and I go back on a porn binge again?
     
  4. numpty

    numpty Fapstronaut

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    You wont go back. That's your mind telling you that - giving you an excuse to fap! If you want to lose your progress and start from scratch go ahead!

    If you fap YES you will go back! !

    Its like running the 100m Olympic run. You're far in the distance at 87m... you want to stop and lose...

    Some of us are on a struggling journey here - we envy you.

    Excuse my strong words but they're needed pal!!
     
    Elduderino and neew_guy like this.
  5. neew_guy

    neew_guy Fapstronaut

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    thanks..i needed those strong words..i guess i can hold on another day and then another one..but the urges keep getting stronger and it the sexual frustration has started to manifest....i get easily irritable these days and angry at silly reasons coz of the sexual frustration..and i would say that u shouldnt envy me,u dont want to live my life(i have ocd)
     
  6. numpty

    numpty Fapstronaut

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    no dude you done well.

    Has your mind rebooted though? If so attempt at getting a partner..
     
    Elduderino and neew_guy like this.
  7. The Eleven

    The Eleven Fapstronaut

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    Tell you what: You get to 9o days, and then we'll see.
     
    Elduderino, neew_guy and numpty like this.
  8. neew_guy

    neew_guy Fapstronaut

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    thanks for the encouragement guys..i need it :) ..i didnt pmo'd today..but everyday i am just pushing myself to go one extra day :(
     
    Elduderino likes this.
  9. neew_guy

    neew_guy Fapstronaut

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    i dont think it has rebooted yet..i still crave for the fetish porn and i guess if i did watch porn now,that will be the first thing i will watch..and its nearly impossible for me to get a partner being an introvert, shy guy with no self confidence
     
  10. numpty

    numpty Fapstronaut

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    Hmm dude check this. You ask a girl out or talk to a girl if she's interested she's interested.

    If not all she will say is no. You wont be humiliated you wont be slapped on the face.

    Soon you will realise you win some and you lose some.

    Dude you lose some because your not everyone's type. Just like an older woman who's over weight might not be your type. We all have types.

    Personally i think introverts attract the girls that have an intellectual mindset - am struggling currently to find someone who has some brains!!

    Go foe it. I was like you too. I haven't rebooted my attempts this year didnt go great but i feel more confident and approaching - especially the win some lose some method.
     
  11. neew_guy

    neew_guy Fapstronaut

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    But the saddest thing is that I have my grad school final year exam is in 4 months time..so anything that will happen in regards to finding a gf will be 5 months later :(
     
  12. AllanTheCowboy

    AllanTheCowboy Fapstronaut

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    Remember, before you ask her out, she isn't dating you. After you ask her out, either she is, or she isn't. Things can only get better, or stay the same. They can't get worse.

    Do you have access to a private study carrel? I had one in grad school, and they were in a locked room. I left my laptop there, cable locked to my carrel, and the adjacent one, and was there 8-12 hours/day. No actual privacy, so you can't view porn, or fap, but enough peace and quiet to get work done. When I was done for the day, which was usually closing time for the library, I closed the laptop, leaving it at my carrel, went home, watched my PVR'd TV shows, went to bed, started over again. Probably the most productive period of my life, and now that I think of it, probably very limited fapping, too! Try adding that to your routine. If you have no work left, but it isn't bed time, and you've done everything else for thar day, stay there and watch netflix/dvd's or play a video game!
     
  13. numpty

    numpty Fapstronaut

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    Erm these days as I have discovered girls play the innocent card as a veil... a lot are into casual encounters. Am not saying seek this but keep an open mind...


    Because the last thing you want to do is assume you have no time and revert to fapping
     
    valjeanshamba likes this.
  14. KingRecover17

    KingRecover17 Fapstronaut

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  15. Adam33

    Adam33 Fapstronaut

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    do push ups and abs every time you feel that you need to fap immediately.
     
  16. Septimus

    Septimus Fapstronaut

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    Neew-guy:

    I saw your post headline, so I'm checking in to say, I'm praying for you and I understand.

    Remember: it's one day at a time.

    And I know how powerful fetish porn can be. I have been trying to think analytically about why I go for what I go for. It's tricky, because you don't want just to recall that stuff--that's the last thing you want to do! I've been asking myself: why does that stuff mean so much to me? What's it about? I don't know if you're able to do that; but there's something to be said for unmasking the thing that has so much power, and figuring out just *why* it has the power it does. For me, it was trying to identify exactly what buttons the fantasy I prefer was pushing in me.

    Also, believe it or not, you can get to a place where you don't have to "obey" when your body gets a reaction. We're not like dogs, where we jump when a voice says, "jump!" It doesn't come easy, but really, you can get to a place where you realize your body is reacting, and you can say, hey, great, but--not now. Sometimes just taking a few breaths. Just hit the "pause" button. Nothing wrong with appreciating a pretty girl, but--stop and think of something *else* that's pleasant. Ice cream. Bacon. Favorite sports. Favorite movie. Whatever it is, just shift the thought.

    Having a body that does all the wonderful things it does is a good thing. Be thankful your body is in working order! But you're saving it for the right place and right time. And it's *your body*--meaning it belongs to you; you don't belong to it.
     

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