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Do urges lessen?

Discussion in 'Abstinence, Retention, and Sexual Transmutation' started by Farzium, Oct 21, 2020.

  1. Farzium

    Farzium Fapstronaut

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    Was wondering if I could get some in sight from people who have beat their fapping habits. I have a habit of fapping and I am wondering if the powerful urges I get to relapse are because of my habit, natural urge to ejaculate, or a combination of both? Curious if after going 90 days and beating your habit the urges aren't as powerful and lessen or if they stay the same.
     
    WOODROW and Comfortablydumb96 like this.
  2. jackolanturnt

    jackolanturnt New Fapstronaut

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    Day 190 here no pmo. Urges do not die down, 20yo here, hormonal peak. Wet dreams are the main issue when you get a streak going. Though by far best decision I have made period.
     
    Farzium likes this.
  3. InTheWilderness

    InTheWilderness Fapstronaut

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    It’s possible to reach a state where you no longer feel the urge. Keep fighting.
     
    Farzium likes this.
  4. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    If you just stop wanking you are 100% still going to get urges, although after a few days you will not have the habit of wanking each day but the urge will still be there at points throughout the day. You are always going to have the urges, it might even get stronger if you don't have a release for it.

    You have to learn to redirect your urges. Right now when you get horny you want to pull up some good porn and beat it, but you have to redirect that horny feeling to women in real life. If I'm seeing a girl and I get horny when I'm not around her, I think about fucking her, rather than going home and beating it. But if I'm on a dry spell I think about wanking since that is my only release for the feeling.

    Best advice I can give to you is get out there and get fucking.
     
    Farzium and Comfortablydumb96 like this.
  5. pump20

    pump20 Fapstronaut

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    Well, being horny is very important because it make our bodies stronger. What we can do is use the energy for working out such as running on a treadmill. Hope this helps.
     
    Farzium likes this.

  6. Hello:

    In my case, it is quite confusing.

    I have 117 days of hard mode today.

    I'm 38 years old. I started using pornography when I was 24 years old:


    During this reboot or recovery from day 70 to day 90 I had a fairly successful physical ability to arouse myself in a very surprising way. I said to myself: Woww, I'm cured. During those days I would get erections just by thinking of touching a woman's hair.

    But, after day 90 my physical urges diminished quite a bit (Flat line maybe?), And the urges to use pornography started.

    From day 90 the impulses to use porn increased. Dreams of using pornographic material also increased (Pornographic dreams while I am sleeping).

    I am currently on day 117 and feel flat. This month has been flat compared to the previous month (September).

    Recovery really is a roller coaster ride. You must be attentive to experience the same things. Maybe yes, or maybe not in your case.
     
    Farzium and bdn94 like this.
  7. theMotivator

    theMotivator Fapstronaut

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    There are two things to note
    Day 0 - 7 urges are to level 0
    Day 7 - 14 urges are almost impossible to ignore
    Day 20 - and so on it somehow gets weaker, but there is a very important thing to know.

    You will get urges, but the power of your resistance will grow over time.

    If you want to avoid urges at all, you must eliminate all triggers as much as possible. It means that you must not look at women, you must not think about them, you must not read about those things etc.
    If in more later stages you will stumble on these things, it will urge you very powerfully, if you are exposed to triggers a lot, but the power of your resistance will have grown by then. It will be easier to resist, but if you do not end the flow of urges by eliminating the trigger, eventually it will just break you.

    I'm telling this being 3 years without M, but still being single, so I don't know how much a wife could help out, but people say that it helps.
     
    Farzium and bdn94 like this.

  8. I personally do not share this idea. It is very exaggerated.

    The idea of giving up pornography is precisely to learn how to look at women in real life. Unless you mean by this looking at images of women on screens or magazines or something like that.

    Disagree with this: You must look at real women. Such abstinence is meaningless, I think. It's my point of view.
     
  9. This is valid but if you want to take the NOFAP for moral or religious reasons. But I do not share this at all because this is not normal either. This thinking is the other extreme of things.

    Remember that extremes are harmful.
     

  10. This is valid but if you want to take the NOFAP for moral or religious reasons. But I do not share this at all because this is not normal either. This thinking is the other extreme of things.

    Remember that extremes are harmful.
     
  11. theMotivator

    theMotivator Fapstronaut

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    If you look at women, your inner urges will trigger you at one point or another. Especially if she is dressed provocatively. If you must talk to them during job or life situations, fine. But just for pleasure no. That's what i meant.
    You must find a wife as soon as possible, and forget about other women, and build a family with good morals.
     
  12. Thanks for answering.

    I leave the conversation with you because I see that we have very different interests.

    I want to be single all my life. I'm on nofap just to give up porn and masturbation for two years. After those two years I want to seek casual sex with some women. I am not interested in marriage my friend.

    Luck in your life.

    I respect your opinions but I don't share them at all

    goodbye.
     
  13. lonely_1

    lonely_1 Fapstronaut

    I'm not someone with a super long streak, but I hope to have one one day. I will however say that my urges to watch porn especially extreme porn has gone down, their not gone, but they are much smaller.

    Also I would like to say that I have been just as horny as ever(except when I go through flat lines), just that it's not directed to porn. This is really good in my opinion because I'm focusing more on girls, not pixels. However, this doesn't mean that I have been fantasizing, just that I'm more interested.
     
  14. dandausa

    dandausa Fapstronaut

    The first few days I find really brutal normally. 1 - 10 for me tend to be pretty hard. After that it really depends on how much I hate my life. If I really hate where I'm at. I start to have fall off my good habits, I get behind on work because of procrastination, my friends aren't available to hang out. Often porn/masturbation is our pacifier. If our lives aren't going well we go back to our pacifier. That's why I think half of pmo recovery is getting daily disciplines for not watching porn. Whatever helps you, get a sponsor, get blocking software, post here, do some challenges, etc. The second half is owning at life. You have to enjoy your life. Do things that keep your life from feeling futile. Have a fundamental belief system that gives meaning to your life, i.e. for me its being a Christian, it gives me hope that this life isn't just a big joke where we live for pleasure and then die. Get good at your job, be the best person on your team. Start becoming top 3 in races for your age group. Go enjoy your life. Create a life you actually enjoy.
     
    Shadow™輝ツ and MHero like this.
  15. Yep, urges go away. Sometimes they return, but only as a small nuisance that you can easily deal with.

    Otherwise, why would we all bother fighting?

    Stay dedicated and don't give up.
     
  16. JoeinUSA

    JoeinUSA Fapstronaut

    Yes, urges don't last forever in one bout. Always know they will subside and calm down, and then you'll feel the delight of having made it through. Practice the heroism of the minute and second, which is the time it takes to give in. In those times, say no and resolve to distract yourself and do something else. And, if even plagued still, just be calm down, accept the turbulence peacefully, and see it out - it cannot decide to relapse for you, however painful. And it won't last indefinitely. You can hold out. Then, enjoy the peaceful times in between. The struggles and urges will come and go again in various forms. Hold onto your original purpose and maintain all the recovery tools that continually work for you.

    .
     
  17. WOODROW

    WOODROW Fapstronaut

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    Yes, they do lessen!!! Please keep your mind on nice pleasant things. Don't dwell on PMO---if you like weight lifting or a nice walk---super ! I do pray a lot and read my BIBLE...no wife no girlfriends..living single here in nyc
     
    Farzium likes this.
  18. I don’t know, I get pretty good urges starting day 3 or so. I bet everyone’s urge levels differ to different days
     
  19. theMotivator

    theMotivator Fapstronaut

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    It's probably connected somehow with the triggers and how much you are used to doing it. When I was beginning I was already used to 7 day cycles (in comparison to every day, when I was addicted to P)
     
  20. Farzium

    Farzium Fapstronaut

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    Thank you all for your responses. It has been extremely helpful.
     

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