A question after an emasculating attempt losing my virginity.

I am 27 and virgin, i started masturbation at ~12, at 13 there was this occasional porn use, but not much, a spike in porn use between 16 and 18. But most of my masturbation was to imagination.

At 22, i had a smartphone, since then, i masturbated daily and often more than once a day to porn, my fantasy fapping habits faded and every urge, i would have my phone and porn ready.

I used webcam sex, and i eventually found myself spending up to few hours watching but not edging until i found the right model and perfect moment. My habit was to fap quickly to the perfect scene and be done with it.

Now i want to note, that i only used porn whenever i felt the need to masturbate, which was daily, and more often twice a day, rarely more.

Now i since earlier this year, i find myself witha really low libido, i found out that my erections are not hard anymore, and without porn i could never wake it up.

My situation became even worse in july, that's when i noticed that my erection goes soft very quickly if i don't keep touching myself. I always knew in my mind that masturbation was bad, and since that moment, i lost all my urges to masturbate and watch porn...

I don't know if this all mental or what exactly, but i remember very well, up to last year in december, my erections were perfect... i read that pied is gradual and happends over few years....so i am really confused.

I would like to note that in January i ate antidepressants for only 30 days(1 package). I also used propranolol during that time in attempts to mute my panic attacks and stoo my body from shaking in public around people. I don't want to believe that i suffer from post ssri sexual dysfunction, it was very difficult to reach orgasm on these meds, after i stopped i was normal, the only explanation is they could have made me lose libido and erectile function in a very slow way throughout 3 or so months??

In August i had the first woman whom wanted sex with me, as much as i was excited about the idea, it didn't feel good at all, i didn't feel aroused, horny, no pleasure whatsoever, i only felt that i need to pleasure her, as if it was my job. My erection could come up at around 70%(barely enough for penetration) only through heavy kissing. Then it dies quickly before i could makke it inside her... nothing worked, bj, hj all failed...


So now could this be from porn or a medical condition? I want to note that i have no real sexual experiences and never been so close tona real girl in any sexual form... until this year at the age of 27.

Could porn make someone from being normal to giving him a very bad case of pied in just few months ?

I remember in summer 2019, last year, i did several masturbation sessions without porn and i didn't notice any issue...

Some feedback is appreciated.

 

How long are you talking about?

 

That sounds a lot like my first sexual experience. It also sounds like performance anxiety, which I also have. Performance anxiety could be specific to sexual stuff, but might also be manifesting in other areas of your life, like work or academia, and has a bit to do with perfectionism.

Definitely quit porn and also fapping if you can. If nofap is too hard, learn to do it without fantasy or outside stimulation. If you have some other anxiety related issue, definitely go seek help for that. Also read or watch some of the basic 'your brain on porn' stuff, pied is relatively common here. And sex with women is nothing like masturbating to porn, so you have to re sensitize yourself.

If the girl is still okay with you, be honest and vulnerable with her, and maybe things could continue.