What makes porn so appealing?

Everything that is pleasurable, can become an addiction. Food, videogames, drugs... And sex, is the most pleasurable of all things.
Because REAL sex, is about LOVE.

You could say Masturbation (stimulation of genitals to obtain pleasure), is like "having sex alone". And porn is a cheap substitute for the sensations you can't feel "having sex alone": the excitement of the visual and the audio, the intimacy, the affection... (i'm sure you can relate to what i'm saying without specific examples). But obviously, as it is a fantasy, it has limitations. You cannot touch, you cannot smell, you cannot taste... You can talk, but you won't get any reply. They are all fake, and your logical mind knows. But your emotional heart doesn't, and he comes back again and again for it, in a desperate attempt to feel loved.

When it is correctly done, sex is the ultimate expression of love. But when it is not, when it is selfish or misused, it becomes devastating.

When you masturbate, you are looking for an emulation of love. That's why people often relapse in hard times, like during depressions, when their self-esteem is low. Because that are the times when they are more needy.

Real Sex is about love, and masturbation is about wishing to be loved.
That's the reason which makes porn and masturbation so addictive.

 

True. That being said we generally use to go back to what we "learned" when we are troubled. And we do establish very slowly new habits. So when you did use porn 20 years long as a stress release, you will most likely fall back into this behaviour very easily.

Also porn surely is something that triggers our curiousity: "you just want to know". At least in the beginning. What is more interstening then a naked body? and i do mean any nakedd body: not just an attractive one - wwe talk about that naked neighbour in his garden as well when we dont like what we see....

Beside the underlying wish for love there is the maybe even more devastating desire to at least see some acts of dominance etc that we - ourselves - aint able to execute. So at least on screen you can see, what your corrupted mind is longing for.

 

I believe that porn is so addictive because we have access to anything we like. There are so many different categories of porn and within minutes of logging on, you've already seen 100's of images and videos of naked women. Each image you see gives you a different dopamine dump and therefore I believe that's one of the reasons it's so addictive. Not sure if you're religious, but either way this verse from the bible stands true to this very day. Proverbs 6:25-26 says Do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do not let her capture you with her eyelashes; for the price of a prostitute is only a loaf of bread, but a married woman hunts down a precious life. I believe this can be applied to porn as well.

 

Apart from those two things, porn is so addictive because of the huge spike in dopamine it causes and the way the brain craves it over and over and over again.

 

Porn is easy to get, unlimited, neurochemically more addicting than hard drugs, novelty, and becoming close to being socially accepted.

it’s like a legal super crack on steroids that kills you slowly inside that no one questions.

 

For me, it's because I'm a 26yo virgin with subzero sexual experience. So it's the closest thing to intimacy I've ever experienced. So many times I watched porn without masturbating. I don't think I've ever saw anyone naked in a sexual setting in my entire life so it just blows me away everytime.

 

There is also the factor of how easy it is to "get in a relationship" with women (or men), and having "sex". There is no courting, no romance, no judgement (coming from behind the screem), no expense of energy, nothing like "how it used to be" (what time period I am referring to, I don't know). All it takes is a few clicks, and you are in a dopamine warehouse. We are programmed to be more efficient. That is, we naturally look for the easy way to save energy and time so we can look out for danger. This whole third world society has made it completely easy for us, just as it has been designed to do. But, that creates a lack of wholesome individuals. Now, everyone can easily get their chemical release through so many means (porn, drugs, etc.)

 

Novelty and shock are the biggest drivers of porn addiction, but novelty is the key. I'm going to try and explain it myself, but these articles from YBOP summarize it much better than I can.

Evolution has not prepared your brain for today’s porn

How is Internet porn different from porn of the past?

Why is the idea of sexual variety so enticing?

Porn, Novelty, and the Coolidge effect

The reason novelty is so effective at hooking people is pretty simple. Humans are animals. The primary function of all animals to to survive long enough to have sex and further their genetic line. Having sex with another animal is therefore one of the most exciting, satisfying, and pleasurable activities you can do. Additionally, having sex with another animal that you perceive to be a more viable partner/caregiver is even more exciting, satisfying, and pleasurable.

Having sex with one animal is great, but what about having sex with two? Well, for pretty much most sexually reproducing animals, having sex with more than one partner is a very good reproductive strategy (more potential offspring means more potential for your genetic line to survive). This gets a little complicated with females, who more often than not have to focus more on childcare and sometimes need a long term partner; however, females of all studied species, including humans, exhibit extremely similar excitement, satisfaction, and pleasure from novel partners as males of the same species. Therefore, situations where animals have access to novel partners are extremely exciting, and will be pursued by all animals.

Ok, so we understand why novel partners feel so good for animals, but why does novel, endless porn feel so good for humans?

This happens because our brains cannot differentiate between porn and real life partners. The sexual reward center of the brain is very primitive, and responds to primitive stimuli to activate (I call it the lizard brain lmao). It's why you can get a boner or get horny from just being excited or with a potential partner in a non-sexual context. It's why just seeing boobs are a butt AND LITERALLY NOTHING ELSE can get you ready for sex. Our bodies can tell the difference between nicotine, heroin, marijuana, and cocaine. However, your brain's sexual reward center just releases dopamine when it's activated, and therefore cannot tell the difference between porn and real people.

 

Dude i feel u im not talking about never seen someone naked but i see porn and not masturbating some times a been wanting to stop MONTHS AGO!! but i just cant and been wanting help