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The START 2021 STRONGER Challenge [CLOSED]

Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by Deleted Account, Sep 3, 2020.

  1. Progress over Perfection my man. DO look back and DO take solace in your accomplishments, not your stumbles. I'm right there with you, but you know what - I am much better than last year.
     
    NICEDUDE likes this.
  2. I got it. Sorry to read this, but please know from a guy who's been there.... I am proud of your efforts and I believe in your ability to rebound in these next days that are to come.
     
  3. Congrats to your family man. What a blessing at the right time of the year.
     
    Schia likes this.
  4. Damn dude, I am sorry to hear that. Perhaps some ideas for others as you process this in the next few days. Many are struggling with their own relapses. I know I have found in my journal that openly discussing the emotional roller coaster ride that is relapse and restarting has helped me but also others that are following. This is as good as any place to put it out there... if you're up to it.
     
    TripleHHH likes this.
  5. Current Challengers:
    @BrohkenCompass
    @Iwanttobefree1
    @gcamt123
    @ToMMy.H
    @aniseprakash
    @New Focus
    @RedStripe
    @WarriorofLight
    @banana man
    @PegasusKid
    @renaissance Man
    @Samurai_God
    @thikk
    @Trojan22
    @Dorian85
    @tonyk1982
    @SideshowBob
    @Ogloc
    @Scapegoat
    @MountainSea
    @Steppingintotheunkown
    @Chakra_Serpent
    @TronPie
    @Jefe Rojo
    @Ghost in the Shell
    @quickstarter
    @Kingler
    @John Uskglass
    @thabo
    @ANameThatStartsWithK
    @Schia
    @theforgotten1423
    @Dragydof
    @TripleHHH
    @Gregory S
    @gaccts82
    @My Best self
    @Teutão
    @Pentabyte
    @The_Director
    @peglegb88
    @Ian Of Freelandia
    @master3
    @Bean43
    @skull67
    @PRS509
    @espresso18
    @Sebbrix
    @Editor
    @brahmacharya
    @_Just_For_PRJ_
    @laser_focus
    @Teo Whispers
    @TudoBem23
    @RollerCoaster
    @gegenavenger
    @Andreid
    @the_Raged_Barbarian
    @1punchman
    @MonkeyMonk
    @JoeinMD
    @HeadlessKnight
    @Ainz

    All caught up guys. I have assigned strikes and tier adjustments and all that. Keep in mind that this is the Start 2021 stronger challenge so its not how you start, it's how you finish the race. Hall of fame, Platinum, Gold, and Silver tiers are all close as of 2 DEC and that leaves only the Bronze tier or bust for those still fighting. Next week the Bronze tier will close as well meaning that any relapses around the 18th or later will place you in the honorable mentions category.

    I want to acknowledge that a few of us have hit and are about to hit those 90 and 100 day streaks. We've also had a few fall off at very high streak counts including 190 days. That's so amazing, and inspirational to folks like me who are struggling to reach 10 days often.

    I have decided that I will be creating a 2021 "challenge" where anybody interested in continuing on the path of abstinence from pornography and associated transgressions can join me there. I haven't mapped it out completely, but I am looking for something that duplicates my 2020 journey where we will track the year in terms of days green and days red (and Amber) if that's your thing. The aim at the 2021 event will be to accumulate as many days clean regardless of the stumbles and falls and to seek growth. Some will reach 365 days of clean - NoFap living , and I hope many of us can achieve that - but for those that do not, we will not have strikes, we will not "fail out", or lose the challenge. We will simply GROW TOGETHER.

    I hope you consider joining me there. Link will be posted soon but for now - if you have any ideas, input, etc. feel free to chip in here and I'll take all into consideration as I draft the event posting thread.

    20 days to go. FINISH STRONG!
     
  6. Brahmacharya_UK

    Brahmacharya_UK Fapstronaut

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    Hey @BrohkenCompass,

    Really stoked to still be in the challenge and your idea of having a new challenge in January.

    i am committed to finishing this year on a positive note. I still feel bad for losing my steak but know that this is all a learning experience. If this process was easy, then everyone would be able to do it no problem.

    Forward to success
     
  7. _Just_For_PRJ_

    _Just_For_PRJ_ Fapstronaut

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    People Lets do it we can do it
    Just 20 days
    Follow the steps & Success is underneath your FEET
    1. EXERCISE [10 Push ups ; 10 sit up ; 10 squats ]
    2. COLD SHOWER
    3. AFTER COLD SHOWER MAKE SURE MEDITATION
    4. Read A Book for 15 min [ Eat that Frog ; The secret ; Awaken the giant Within] highly recommended
    5. Write down Goals of the Day
    6. Plan the day

    Trust me guys I followed this morning routine for about more than 3 month & what i got?
    Muscles? YES (exercise)
    Calmness? YES (cold shower & meditation )
    Productivity boost? YES (books)

    GOLDEN HACKS
    Problem:When urges arrive
    Tell ur best friend ‘brain’ 5 push-ups only . Do it and see the change

    Problem : what if urges remains?
    Go wash your face , go watch the sun, the sky ,feel the air , feel the vibe


    When to take these steps ? When urges gets intense ?
    I say ,don’t even wait for urges ,as soon as you get triggered ,do those step.
    Because u lose ur mind in intense urges


    How to convert mind during urges?
    Say these Golden Lines


    1 . If I quit now, I will soon be back to where I started. And when I started, I was desperately wishing to be where I am.

    2. We Gain the strength of temptation we resist

    3. Think Again... Can You Afford It?

    4. Choices decides consequences

    5. Struggle now & be the champion for your whole life


    If these hacks didn’t work , PUNCH ME ON FACE:emoji_fingers_crossed:

    You Know what,
    At the end of this year
    What do you think did all those streak maintainers Won?
    Nah !
    Everyone who Said I NEVER EVER GIVE UP
    Everyone Who Said I RELAPSED, NO PROBLEM I WILL COME STRONGER
    Everyone Who Was HONEST WITH THEMSELVES & HONEST WITH EVERYBODY
    These people are HEROES upload_2020-12-13_1-56-39.jpeg
     
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2020
    Schia, BrohkenCompass and TripleHHH like this.
  8. _Just_For_PRJ_

    _Just_For_PRJ_ Fapstronaut

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    In case if you don’t know this lady upload_2020-12-13_1-59-21.jpeg
     
    Schia and BrohkenCompass like this.
  9. Yeah, there was a part of my mind that knew it was a call for help.
    It hurts to have any blemish, but the positive side is it was about the least committed relapse ever.

    I definitely saw pornographic material but mostly turned away at each sighting.
    I mostly just sat with a boner and didn't stoke.
    I ejaculated when I wasn't even looking at a nude body.
    That might be tmi, but I guess that's the nature of this site :)
    Still, a relapse is a relapse.

    That night and day after was an emotional struggle. Still, I came back to the advice;

    "Focus on the progress not the gap". And also what you pointed out; looking at all the days clean we've had vs those relapsed.
    I can see how much better I am and that is awesome.
     
    BrohkenCompass and TripleHHH like this.
  10. TripleHHH

    TripleHHH Fapstronaut

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    Yes I will do so, it will be interesting for me as well, since the first few days after relapse are mostly the hardest to me.

    Let me begin with saying that I'm not really feeling set back because of this relapse. I had a 190 days streak, which is the longest so far for me. The important thing right now is to not get in a relapse cycle. My counter might be back to 0, my "healing" progress is not back to 0... So for everyone that recently relapsed, get right back in and dont let the counter get in your head too much...
     
  11. TripleHHH

    TripleHHH Fapstronaut

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    Very good, now keep going! :)
     
  12. Day - 80/81

    I just want to congratulate... really anyone here reading this.

    To those of you in the Legends tier, thank you for staying fully clean. Please keep it up.
    It is an awesome gift to yourself
    (Which ought to be number 1 reason right now).

    It also is encouraging and inspiring to the rest of us.

    The confusion and doubt that comes up as you start to teeter on the edge of relapse is not worth it.

    "Does this count as a relapse? If I walk away now am I still in the clear?"

    If you get to the point of asking these questions, please just walk away and call yourself clean.
    The mental gymnastics of trying to answer those questions while in the thrust of it leads to a downward spiral, at least in my experience and from what I hear from others.
    (That goes for all of us, not just the Legends tier)

    To those of us with recent relapse, the good news is we are in this together, and can finish the year of well.
     
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2020
    BrohkenCompass likes this.
  13. That's why I have my signature block, which "Spoiler Alert" will be the foundation of my 2021 year-long challege. Keeping track of the "green days" reminds me of two things. 1. I've been here before and I can do it. 2. Relapse is not the end of recovery, it is a part of recovery.
     
  14. (I tried to quote this in my last post but the format was freaking out, at least on my side.
    Sorry if it's redundant.)

    I feel the same.
    I'll be keeping the count out of my total days in the challenge. It has helped me significantly over this year.
    Encourage anyone else too as well.
    @BrohkenCompass has already been doing this.
     
    TripleHHH and BrohkenCompass like this.
  15. Awesome. I'm enthusiastic about the new forum. I think bringing some of the connections in his group and the real progress we've made together, will be a positive aspect so long as we keep at it. :)
     
    BrohkenCompass likes this.

  16. Awesome post! The key I see in this is the moderation. If any of it is a little too much for someone, I'd recommend just scaling it back. That's just my "2 cents"
     
    BrohkenCompass likes this.
  17. Brahmacharya_UK

    Brahmacharya_UK Fapstronaut

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    Hey Man,

    It is the chance of seeing Gems like this that makes me keep coming back to the site.

    I personally am too much of a pussy to get the cold shower part but all the other stuff I can see easily incorporating into my day. Re Frog I absolutely love Brian Tracy's stuff, Maximum Acheivement is pretty awesome, I'll give the other books a look as well.

    The proof of the pudding is in the eating, and the fact that you've personally seen these results from applying this program is massively encouraging.


    Your golden rules such as "If I quit now, I will soon be back to where I started. And when I started, I was desperately wishing to be where I am." really encapsulate the struggles that we face and show a route to overcome them.

    Your offer to bestow physical violence upon you is very kind, but I think you will be safe!

     
    BrohkenCompass likes this.
  18. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Day 90 - a continuing calm streak for me in terms of staying PMO-free even though repeated emotional issues with the wife this weekend are stressful. This is a really tough time of year as always, and the pandemic makes things even more difficult now. I read many of my comrade's stories here and I realize how challenging life can be and comparatively, other than my PMO addiction, how easy my life is. For those that have recently relapsed, I support your efforts to view your PROGRESS in terms of how much BETTER this year is than last. If last year meant daily PMO and days-long binges, and now you are just straying for a few wanks, then build on that progress as we head in 2021. Let's continue the awesome fellowship here next year and thanks to @BrohkenCompass for leading the 2021 challenge. Stay strong.
     
    BrohkenCompass likes this.
  19. Proud to report that I committed to yesterday and stayed clean all weekend. Going to bed pretty soon. Had a busy weekend, but not too much in terms of triggers, urges, etc. Just getting through the day and breaking the binge was a big step.
     
  20. TheManInTheArena

    TheManInTheArena Fapstronaut

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    Day 76 in the books.

    The last couple days have been extremely tough. It is what it is.

    On a side note, we watched White Christmas with Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye. Tons of killer tap dancing! Thoroughly enjoyed it.

    While I was watching the movie the thought “what if I grew up watching tons of this type of stuff, instead of all the garbage Porn”, would I be any different today?

    Tonight I was deciding to look at some pictures of the outdoors, mountains, camping, etc, and my mind told me “this is such a waste of time”, yet edging for 5 hours to pornography makes perfect sense. Lol! Gee that makes perfect sense...not!! Lol.

    Happy to have 76 days. ... cheers.
     

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