35 and Older Accountability Group

Excellent thought, 1000% agree!

 

I was doing pretty well. Found an AP on here and he just wanted to talk about porn sites. And of course I relapsed hard.

 

@David2018 That's unfortunate. Sucks when you get into something for one outcome and end up with the opposite. I don't have any experience as an AP, and don't have one either, but hit me up if you need

 

Morning all, checking in.

 

Checking in. Hard few days but I will make it through and I will win.

 

I have read the rules and would like to join this group

 

Feeling a ton of stress right now and the need to escape with a full PMO expedition. This, despite the fact that for the last couple weeks I've been doing really well. I'm still and always will be an addict and right now feeling weak, struggling to stay clean.

 

MT - good to see you back although with not the best news. I think there's been a lot of struggles here amongst many members. Tough time of year or the state of the world or something. Good luck with your new plan, I myself would have difficulty with M without content - I'd immediately head for the pixels. Stay strong.

 

Still reeling from this weekend. Ended up with 4 hours of PMO today. I don't want to do it but I did. I moved out of my office and into another room of the house on a laptop for the rest of the work day. Things are better now.

 

Monday eve check in. Not been good recently. PM is something to turn to when COVID is getting me down. Blah!

 

Looking at my personal life goal was bleak at best. I have been offered something filfilling and promising. Or i can continue on my own path enslaved to sin. I must surrender.

 

Hi guys, in my quest for doing nofap, I am almost become an asexual. My personality has changed. My motivation in life has gone down very low. I am not very optimistic about anything anymore. I am not seeking to change my life as I feel that nothing has any meaning. In last few days, I even thought of fapping again, as I don’t like this state. I, however, didn’t attempt it as I have become almost monk-like now. I have been having these motivational and low energy issue since I started and happened in my first 90 days nofap streak as well. I thought it was all because of pandemic. I am in a confused state of mind, I feel like going back to earlier state of mind but afraid that I didn’t achieve much even then. However, I was motivated to do something even if it resulted in failure. Now, I don’t even want to attempt. Any suggestions? Thanks.

 

@artifact I'm crashing and burning.

I'd like to bow out from the group and get my head on straight. I'm planning to be PM free while I do that but I'm wanting to start again fresh soon.

 

Thanks for responding. Yes, I thought that as well too. I was wondering how long these side effects could go on. I already have 90 days nofap under my belt, but it comes back in every cycle. Seriously, I just want to leave everything behind and become a monk. Nothing passionate me much. Earlier, I was wasting my time in doing fapping. Now, I am wasting my time dealing with the side effects of nofap. Is there something which I could do and have a better life? I am very low on confidence as well because my work is some source of confidence in which I can’t concentrate anymore. I am failing in every aspect of my life right now. I hoped things would be better in 2021, but still waiting for life to get on track. It’s just unfortunate.

 

Quick check in. I'm getting quite successful in resisting my urges to peek. Right now what I do is that as soon as I feel an urge, I take a minute and have a rational discussion with myself: okay, I could peek now, but where would that peeking take me? And then I try not to see peeking as some inherently evil thing that I must stay away from at all costs - because then it becomes this forbidden thing that is appealing exactly because it's forbidden. Instead I tell myself: sure, I can do that, if I can convince myself with rational arguments that it's a good idea to do that. And then I find I never have a good reason to do it, so I don't do it.

This works well for me now, but it requires attention and mindfulness and I really have to take time for it. I know that as soon as I fall back to acting from impulse and habit, I'll wanna go back to peeking. So I try to train myself to make all my choices more deliberate.

I didn't feel the need to M for almost a week now, so I might go back to excluding M entirely again, but right now I wanna keep that as a fallback option for myself. Let's see how it goes.