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Girls attracted even if they're in a relationship

Discussion in 'Abstinence, Retention, and Sexual Transmutation' started by JLD, Jan 16, 2021.

  1. JLD

    JLD Fapstronaut
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    Hey,

    I’ve been in the following situation with several girls in the past months. What I’m about to say only happens when I’m on semen retention for two weeks and more. It never happens when I’m jacking off daily.

    So the situation is that I’m in the presence of a girl in a group and she just can’t hide her attraction to me. It happened several times with different girls. Signs are: playing with hairs, seducing looks, sexual laughing, moving subtly near me (I’m not even sure they’re conscious of this one) and more. But the problem IS : the girls are married or in a relationship. And since it’s a group, well their husbands or boyfriends are also there…and they notice that something is going on too. And it makes everyone uncomfortable (except the girl that seems to not even realizing it).

    Now I know that some fapstronauts will say “well yeah it’s normal.. girls are attracted to guys on semen retention” but isn’t there a limit to not cross? I mean it’s like even if they’re engaged it suddenly becomes much less important and they can’t hide their attraction. It’s like the attraction/magnetivism is stronger than the relationship they're having with someone. And to be totally honest it also happened to me too. I was with a girl and we fucked every nights. My nuts were drained. The girl and I had a good relationship together. However, in a group sitution, another guy, that was really disciplined and most probably on semen retention, met the girl I was with. It's like I didn't exist anymore! The girl wasn't abble to hide her attraction to the guy. It put everyone unconfortable.

    How do we explain this?
     
    Last edited: Jan 16, 2021
    danhuk, Micah_Orion and blacklabel92 like this.
  2. TheForsakeen

    TheForsakeen Fapstronaut

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    Stop hanging out with libertines and cuck should be allowed to duel cheaters(to the death).
     
  3. CRSG

    CRSG Fapstronaut

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    THE BEAUTY OF ENERGY
     
  4. Ainz

    Ainz Fapstronaut

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    Do you have wet dreams ?
     
  5. JLD

    JLD Fapstronaut
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    No I do not.
     
  6. if only that were true for me:( i can never make it.
     
  7. This semen retention thing is a brain trap. Don't fall for it. It has happened to me earlier , you become overconfident and then you find yourself again in a pit.
    As for those girls , stay away from such kind of persons. A relationship should be more about character than looks( or so called semen retention).
     
  8. primaljade

    primaljade Fapstronaut

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    Totally agree. Depending on this questionable concept is priming men for failure.
     
  9. Hustler0008

    Hustler0008 Fapstronaut

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    Do you have any reasons for saying that, brother?

    I would want to know some possible retrogressive effects as well.
     

  10. Yeah. To much confidence or arrogance to be precise.
     
  11. Ainz

    Ainz Fapstronaut

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    Yeah, happens with me too. A confidence which is not backed by skills.
     
  12. JLD

    JLD Fapstronaut
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    I think this is the reason why one has to train/strengthen himself/meditate/experiment/read/study/etc.

    So your confidence is backed by skills and you do not fall into arrogancy or over-confidence.
     
    Last edited: Feb 23, 2021
  13. Ainz

    Ainz Fapstronaut

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    That's true. That's why I am going gym, focusing on my career, learning music instruments etc etc.
    Semen retention atleast gives me energy enough to carry out these tasks everyday, small steps but atleast moving forward.
     
    Protagonist, AmazingBulk and JLD like this.
  14. Hisself

    Hisself Fapstronaut

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    This is simple human biology. Psychology and biology cut through everything including monogamy which is a societal paradigm. It has no real basis in terms of human evolution. Read any book on the biology of human mate selection and you’ll have your answer.
     
  15. primaljade

    primaljade Fapstronaut

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    I'll guess what @Munchausen would say:
    1.) There's no good evidence that semen retention makes you more attractive to women. Anecdotal evidence is weak, especially when you selectively choose what evidence to show for it. People who make these assertions need real evidence to back it up. Confirmation bias will warp your perception of reality.
    2.) When you believe semen retention will finally be the thing that makes you attractive, you're setting yourself up for failure when you finally find out and accept that it's bogus. If a big reason for you doing NoFAP is to get women, you're at high risk of relapse when you're rejected. Sure, maybe you can keep deluding yourself for a while, but is it healthy to delude yourself into having magical attraction powers?
     
  16. don0529

    don0529 Fapstronaut

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    its funny... The main reason that our magnetism increases (and thus more girl interest) is because we aren't thinking or caring about if girls are attracted to us, but then when we start focusing on that and trying to milk it, then our glow dims and the magnetism lowers and the girls seem less attracted to us. Its like we get what we have always wanted when we truly stop wanting it. But that cant be faked or pretended. We have to truly not desire it. But then what is the point of getting it when it doesn't matter anymore? Life is funny like that...
     
  17. CRSG

    CRSG Fapstronaut

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    NO your energy rises and gets bigger on NoFap. The energy accumulates; transmutes to your physical. women like energy. everyone wants energy. cause everyone subconsciously want to be strong and stay strong, yet many people don't have the knowledge to do so. so they look to you. Hollywood understands the concept of NoFap and how energy works. this is why they are so charismatic.
     
    Last edited: Feb 28, 2021
  18. Hustler0008

    Hustler0008 Fapstronaut

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    Well, thank you for your response!

    I wanted to add something to it!

    For the past one and half years, I have experimented with this NoFap and women attraction stuff!
    And what I found is that it's not like when you are in NoFap, girls will fall for you, fantasize about you, and die without you - kind of attraction. The attraction evolves over time - it grows slowly. When you are in NoFap, you will start treating girls like any other person - you won't try to win her validation and favor her or impress her. And this to most girls shows honesty and genuine nature because most guys just try to impress them and have sex with them, by doing different kinds of stuff. Because an attractive woman is so used to getting hit by boys, she can sense your neediness from miles away. But when she realizes that you are those few who do not care about her validation, she starts being attracted to you. And I guess this is also the reason why those who have retained semen for so long are highly attractive to women.

    If it helps, I will share my part of the story.
    A friend of mine once proposed to me and told me that she has fantasized about our children as well. She told all her family members and all my friends about it, and I was the last one to know. Of course, I was very shocked, and knowing that she has all these long-term expectations from me, I rejected her. And the main reason why she went so far as to literally submit herself completely to me was my spirituality. I was so soaked up in my spiritual journey at that time and would ask everyone around me about "Who are you from within?" and many other kinds of stuff that the girl whom I never tried to even impress was high over heels for me.

    I guess a similar logic works in the case of NoFap.
    During NoFap you focus on your well-being and enjoying your life so much that shallow pleasures seem meaningless to you. Whenever you are with a girl, instead of trying to "get something from her" you try to "give something to her" and this process becomes spontaneous during NoFap. Whereas if you are fapping, you have to fake it to be genuine and real, at least that is what came from my experience.

    Okay, leave all these stuffs aside.
    As men aren't we naturally supposed to retain semen?
    As we mostly experience during NoFap the sudden desire to try difficult tasks and be fearless, it was extremely important when we used to be hunters. We had to kill animals and our survival was not something certain as it is in today's world. And imagine hunters fapping daily and then, going for hunting. How does that look? Will such hunters survive?

    Maybe our ancestors also masturbated and those who did were weak and comparatively less daring. And slowly they could not survive. Those who did survive were mostly those who did not masturbate.

    The reason why fapping is horrible is that it tells you to submit to your desires. In a single day, you may have tens if not hundreds of desires circulating through your head. If you start acting out on each of them, your ultimate purpose of living will be lost in the sand. And semen retention is nothing, but a practice to let those desires be there, but don't act on it.

    So, to finally conclude whatever bold feelings or arrogant emotions we feel during NoFap is nothing but our natural defense mechanism we developed as hunters which was necessary for our survival at that time. In today's world, we can direct it to other stuffs like channeling our creativity and working on our physical strength rather than draining the energy out.

    P.S. One more thing: As per my personal experience, I have got more attention from girls by being genuine and real than being flirty. By being flirty you may win her temporary attraction, but by being genuine, you win her respect for a lifetime. That's what girls say to me often, "I don't want to flirt with you, but respect you." Previously I thought that's bad, I want to be attractive, but later I realized that respect is above attraction. The attraction will die quickly, but respect won't. And probably this is the best relationship advice I have got so far, "Don't look for love in a relationship. Look for respect."

    Peace!
     
    Last edited: Feb 28, 2021
  19. Retention

    Retention Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for sharing the wisdom, I completely agree.
    I'm married and I can say that respect > attraction or love is better.

    When you have respect in a relationship, working on the relationship is much easier.
    And we all know every single relationship needs constant work.
    It makes the entire journey exciting and you start celebrating the small wins together.

    This increases intimacy between people on a emotional aspect. And we all know where that leads.
     
  20. Lilla_My

    Lilla_My Fapstronaut

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    Maybe their husbands are porn addicts? Makes us wanna look elsewhere of course!
     
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