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Can't get past three days

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by ndtobb, Apr 25, 2021.

  1. Apr 25, 2021 #1
    ndtobb

    ndtobb Fapstronaut

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    This was originally going to be my first journal entry, but I prefer to post it here so someone can assess my situation.

    19 yo here. I have been MOing since I was 5 and PMOing since I was about 9. I have tried NoFap by myself many times, probably for 2 years if not more. The thing is, I usually fail at the third day. I have once been able to do a whole week and felt tremendously free.

    In the process I have become a christian and joined my local CrossFit box. I aim to make a habit out of fasting, prayer and workout as my main ways to cope with this.

    My main struggle is that once I have relapsed and PMOed, thoughts will start emerging little by little and in a lapse of 1 to 24 hours I will be fully convinced that I really wanna PMO, with no way of convicting me out of it.

    I have no social life whatsoever, people tend to dislike me because I have no common interests with anyone and look depressed, I suffer from big social anxiety and I'm incapable of small talk with people I don't know, I won't even greet someone from college on the street; still I consider myself an extrovert which is horrible. Nofap makes me more social from day 2 and it changes everything, I'm happier. I'm aware of the eventual flatline tho, but it is worth it.

    Please feel free to comment on my strategy, situation or give me tips to get past the 3 day mark. It feels almost as learned helplessness to me.
     
    ndtobb, Apr 25, 2021
    ndtobb, Apr 25, 2021
    #1
  2. Apr 25, 2021 #2
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    What the...
    If this is true, and I am not even sure it's possible, this might be the most disturbing thing I have read in a long time.
     
    Deleted Account, Apr 25, 2021
    Deleted Account, Apr 25, 2021
    #2
  3. Apr 25, 2021 #3
    ndtobb

    ndtobb Fapstronaut

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    Well it is true, and I hope I can do something to change my fate. It's not like I'm gonna have to go for suicide or accept this shit as part of my life.
     
    ndtobb, Apr 25, 2021
    ndtobb, Apr 25, 2021
    #3
  4. Apr 25, 2021 #4
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gratification_disorder


    This is actually pretty common. There's nothing to feel bad about. You've recognized the problem and that's a big step in the forward direction.
     
    Deleted Account, Apr 25, 2021
    Deleted Account, Apr 25, 2021
    #4
  5. Apr 25, 2021 #5
    capablex100

    capablex100 Fapstronaut

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    Think about exactly what is happening in your mind right before you relapse. What are you feeling? Sad, stressed, bored? Do urges happen out of the blue, or are they triggered by something you've seen/heard? Is there a certain time of day when PMO became a habit? You're on the right track with finding new activities you enjoy and can occupy your time with. Now you just need to just be aware of when an urge is "coming on" so that you can immediately address it before it goes too far and lingers too long in your mind. If you are being triggered by something (for example, pictures on social media) cut that trigger out of your life. If you PMO because you're depressed and want to "feel better", address why you are depressed in the first place. If you've always had a habit of PMO before bedtime and simply getting into bed makes you think of it, create a new very specific nighttime routine. Those are just some examples. This process will take a lot of self-reflection and self-awareness to figure out exactly what goes on in your mind when you want to relapse, and how to stop that thought process in its tracks. Don't give up, you can do it!
     
    capablex100, Apr 25, 2021
    capablex100, Apr 25, 2021
    #5
    ndtobb likes this.
  6. Apr 26, 2021 #6
    Fraza

    Fraza Fapstronaut

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    We all have a day 90. 90 days is a big accomplishment but 90 days isn't everything. Your day 4 could be your day 90. My day 90 could be my day 7. You have to celebrate your small wins first.
     
    Fraza, Apr 26, 2021
    Fraza, Apr 26, 2021
    #6
    vercent99, BigBrain and ndtobb like this.
  7. Apr 26, 2021 #7
    ndtobb

    ndtobb Fapstronaut

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    Okay, I'll note it down whenever I feel the urges and identify the triggers. I have definitely relied too much on my memory and I for sure forget what triggers me in some days' time.
     
    ndtobb, Apr 26, 2021
    ndtobb, Apr 26, 2021
    #7
    capablex100 likes this.
  8. Apr 26, 2021 #8
    degeneratecoomer

    degeneratecoomer New Fapstronaut

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    Proverbs 16:6 By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD men depart from evil.
     
    degeneratecoomer, Apr 26, 2021
    degeneratecoomer, Apr 26, 2021
    #8
    diep likes this.

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