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Please help: Day 26

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by nutnutninja, Apr 27, 2021.

  1. nutnutninja

    nutnutninja Fapstronaut

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    Hello all,

    I am new to nofap, on day 26, i get soft and/or hard morning woods on alternate days.
    Where most of people on this community fighting their urges and finding it hard to sustain their NoFap streak, Why do i feel asexual and easy going with NoFap. Its like NOFAP is my cup of tea , earlier i was fapping and binge watching porn and when i decided to challenge NOFAP this to cure my ED problem.

    I am on my 26th day of streak and it is longest one.
    Sure i feel Energy surge and confidence and clear brain, but what about my sexuality.
    Sure i will be completing my 90 days streak.


    I feel no urge in day to fap/porn/sex and i dont do/think about it as well.
    Am I doing something wrong. Please help and share your views, I'll be grateful.
    Thanks.
     
  2. unique78

    unique78 Fapstronaut

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    Your Doing good
     
    Johnthesavage and nutnutninja like this.
  3. It’s natural, I was on day 20 with no urges, then bam! Full body urges that were like a dog in heat, stay on guard.
     
    Johnthesavage and nutnutninja like this.
  4. nutnutninja

    nutnutninja Fapstronaut

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    Exactly when did your body start hitting urges?
     
  5. Starfinder89

    Starfinder89 Fapstronaut

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    You're doing fine. It's called a flatline. When you quit porn and get past a certain time period, which is different for every one, then you get to a different point. Your brain is having a shut down in the synapses that are related to porn. This quiet-time is good. It opens up possibilites for the synapses, which are related to real people and real intimacy. That can take time - months. Don't be bothered by that. Just live your asexual life for a bit and enjoy not having these urges all the time. You can even talk to women and connect with them on asexual friendship- terms.
    Eventually you're going to find your way back to connecting to normal intimacy - every guy does that a little different. And that's the healing process in a nutshell.
    Cheers.
     
    Johnthesavage and nutnutninja like this.
  6. Well that specific reboot attempt was weird for me, it was around day 21 when I got my first urges and it hit me like a freaking truck it was unlike anything I ever have experienced.
     
  7. nutnutninja

    nutnutninja Fapstronaut

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    Thats relief, thanks man.!
     
  8. FezMan76

    FezMan76 Fapstronaut

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    Don't worry about it. You might be experiencing a "flatline" state as some may call, which I kinda wish I was back on tbh. You may think it's weird that you don't think about sex all the time because it's the first time that your mind has come this clean. Carry on brudda and don't give up!
     
  9. unique78

    unique78 Fapstronaut

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    A Woman's Sad story about her Boyfriend Who Suicided Due to Porn Addiction , Please share it so that we can stop Porn Industry , This Her Reddit ID - Emotional-Craft-9910 And The Following is her Thread
    Boyfriend's Porn Addiction of 18 years led to him taking his own life.
    [​IMG]
    Hello. I am beyond devastated and my world has completely fallen apart. In an instant I have lost the love of my life who died by suicide at the end of February this year.

    Me and my boyfriend had been together for almost 3 years, we rented together last year during lockdown, had planned to get engaged this year and we were actively house-hunting. We had so many plans for our future. This was about to be the best time of our lives.

    A bit of history: 6 months into our relationship I discovered the hundreds of messages from girls at all hours of the day/night. Eventually I realised they were online, global, camgirls and special friends with whom he did online video calls to masturbate to or have Skype sex etc. I told him this crosses a boundary and that is cheating and he said he'd stop. I was very sheltered and I never even knew you could directly approach pornstars etc. I never even knew camgirls were a thing.

    Anyway I then discovered the extent of it with his several email addresses, several Skype accounts and myfreecams/chaturbate accounts. Then I thought omg this is huge and so much deeper than I thought. And he clearly hadn't stopped.

    It kept happening, and he always seemed a bit distant, a bit worried or anxious, on edge and he wasn't interested in real life sex. In the first year he liked to 'gift' me items which I'd later realise were things camgirls often wore. He dressed me up in pink wigs, glasses, fishnets, heart shaped chokers, the whole grunge aesthetic. It kept happening where he would ask girls to Skype with him or do sexual acts etc. and I'd find out.

    He was addicted to cybersex and any moment I left the house it happened. It was awful. I kept thinking he was just a narcissist who thought he was so hot he needed thousands of women for validation etc. But when I'd see him on the floor in tears begging me not to leave him or break up with him is when I realised he was really unwell. I realised he physically couldn't stop.

    He had tried to stop so many times before on his own but said he never could. He also jerked to pictures of real life female friends that he still hung out with in real life which made me question if he was hung up on an ex or something. He swore he wasn't and that it was all tied in to fantasy. Anyway, several times he relapsed, several times we almost broke up, but I was so in love with him and could see he was a broken man and so I kept coming back to him to try and make it work.

    We tried all the logical steps, get rid of computer, reduce technology, porn filters and safe search engines and porn blockers etc. I even suggested he start therapy with a professional sex addiction/porn addiction therapist last summer which he did do and made some great progress. Or so I thought.

    At christmas/new year he had a message come in from a Russian girl. I lost it. Apparantly he had purchased another phone which he was keeping at his workplace and he had contacted all his 'favourites' on Christmas eve to let them know he had a new number etc. I was so heartbroken plus I found it out on my birthday (new years eve).

    I had suggested before that he talk to his family because it was all getting too much for me to manage on my own. I couldn't really talk to anyone in my family about it as they wouldn't understand porn stuff. In January this year after finding out he had a secret phone at work was when I said he should tell his parents.

    He did. And he felt such a huge overwhelming relief. His parents are wonderful people and were supportive even despite the taboo etc. They were very shocked however to never have picked up on it but it made sense as he'd always been anxious and depressed and addicted to the computer.

    We were all a good support for each other and my boyfriend had felt relieved that it wasn't a dark secret anymore. He really seemed to be doing so well and we had the best few months.

    It all went south when a message came from a girl in America who accused him of being a paedophile, a predator and she accused him of sexual grooming of her. She said he'd shown her dick picks when she was 15 and he was 26. He had pretended to be younger but eventually told her he was 26/27 and she hadn't cared because they were friends.

    Since then he was so sick to his stomach, he frantically started destroying discs/hard drives and burning them etc. And he looked physically tormented and in agony. I asked him about it but he never really said much. I said we can see what help is available even if you are that way inclined. I just loved him so much I was prepared to do anything. But I was also worried about the police coming to take him away if the girl reported him.

    Basically then his parents found out and at first they said it'd be okay but a couple of days later they got cross with him and said he should hand himself in to the police. I wasn't there when they had these discussions I was working. But that day he didnt go in to work and instead they'd been talking all night and day. His parents were worried sick too and didn't want to be implicated and said they couldn't live with it.

    I am so heartbroken. He called me several times but he never once said what was going on or that he'd been told to hand himself in. Instead of doing that, he jumped off the 18th floor of a block of flats and never came home. The police came to tell us all that he was dead.

    Please. Porn is awful. I don't think he was a P but we are so lost and confused and don't know how to cope. Why was he destroying those discs? I thought it was just screen records of his favourite camgirls or something. But if it was 18 years of addiction maybe he had accessed illegal content? I wish I knew. I just wish he was still alive.

    It is heartbreaking. Porn has killed my boyfriend. Porn has ruined my life and taken a precious soul out of this world. He was the most precious man, sensitive, sweet, incredibly handsome, generous, funny, hard-working, lots of friends and a wonderful family. He was only 33.

    It is now just over 2 months since it happened and I'm still stuck in time. I don't know how to cope.
     
    Last edited: May 4, 2021
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