35 and older accountability, Group 2

Welcome. Why are you doing nofap?

 

Because my masturbation is becoming increasingly unmanageable and having a major impact on my relationships. I know I need connection and support to beat it And I also know I'm capable of this change...

 

Day 9 for me today. Typically this is where my honeymoon period starts to wane and the first lot of urges creep in with their sweet whisper. Off to do some boxing shortly and I know that will be really helpful to tire me out and connect with self physically and mentally in a healthy way...

 

I'm on day 72. Never believe at the start I'd get near 90 days yet I'll be there soon.

 

Yes you are

 

That's awesome to hear - very inspiring

 

Powerful!

 

Who else is going to do it for you?

 

Relapsed. Had bn having thoughts of what does it matter, who gives a f***. And watched porn. Had abad day anyway.

14 day streak broken. My longest ever. Thought it was going to result in some big revelation and increasingly it wasn't looking like it !

Wanted to go 90 days and be proud of myself but couldn't.

I was having a brain fog. Not able to concentrate on anything. Thinking if it all the time. I have fasted before and this was just like it. During fast I am.just waiting for it to be over, feeling a weird thing in the tummy. Here I was having a 2eird sensation in crotch area, as if my body just pleading me to give up all the mindf*** and give it what it needs

 

Checking in. So I’m technically on day 12 of no PO. For those who say edging is not masterbation, I think they are fooling themselves and putting to much importance into the number of days, vs the quality of those days. Quit counting days so much, and focus more on the quality of your days.

I did do some edging 2 nights ago. I did not look at P or O, but like I said, for my standards, edging is masterbation so I’m resetting my day counter.

I heard someone make a good point the other day. I notice that I usually fall into that trap where I feel like I have to be perfect. One little setback, like edging, or 5 seconds of porn, used to demoralizing me and I’d feel like I need to completely start over which made me want to quit all together. But I’m trying to think about it like this.

His point: What’s easier to tell your Girlfriend, or your wife, or your accountability partner, or just yourself: That i had a little setback and looked at Porn and edged for 20 seconds, but caught myself and stopped immediately? Or, that I spent the last 2 days looking at porn and masterbating?

Point being of this post: you are allowed to stumble along the way with your recovery. So don’t beat yourself up to hard for those little setbacks.

 

I had days during week 3 and 4 where I thought I was going to explode if I didn't release myself. Its hard, really really hard(No pun intended). The mind battle have had is when I've done a long streak of no orgasm and my brain is wondering how awesome the orgasm is going to be. Everytime I just try and distract myself. I'm on day 73. The urges are there but as time is passing they become less intense because you kind of just get used to them to the point that they lose their meaning. You know what's happening you've been there before and the duration of the urges get much shorter and less frequent. Keep at it you will get to 90 days

 

Day 10 today. Almost slipped - started to go into fantasy about a facebook chat i had with a female friend and began to get aroused. Pulled myself out of it somehow and shut device. Need to watch that. Its the unstructured time in the evening that remains my biggest risk..

 

Truly amazing! Congratulations. Cant wait to see you get to 90 because I know you will. This group is here for day 0 (me today) or day 72 or beyond. Thanks for giving us hope today.


My checkup: I slipped last night after 6 days. My goal now is to get through this weekend clean and not use again. The weekends are usually my toughest time because of unstructured time.

 

Nice! I used to have an R6

Be safe out there!

 

So I had a “relapse” early morning today. What an over used word: relapse. In this community, the word relapse is highly overused and probably miss understood. Just like the words “God” and “Love” is constantly used in the rest of the world without understanding it’s meaning. But i digress...

One thing I like about a relapse after going about 12 days without PMO is that it’s fast. I rubbed one out within 2 minutes and got on with the rest of my night. So I relapsed, or did I? On the contrary, I want to congratulate myself for jerking off last night because I did it without really desiring porn. Actually, I was looking at this real estate magazine sitting in front of me with kind of a hot real estate agent on the cover. So I technically used an image, but it definitely wasn’t porn.

I noticed that the chaser affect tends to be less strong if porn is not used.

Also. If anyone read that list of changes I was trying to do all at once. I think I’ve learned all that requires to much time, and I just haven’t been consistent getting it all done. So instead, I’m going to just focus on 3 qualities daily to master: Cold showers, reading, and meditation.

 

LOL You crack me up man, great share

Love the 3 focus of the day, What works for me is to make the minimum commitment more perciese, such as at least 30 seconds of cold shower, 20 pages of reading and 20 meditation,

 

I slipped again but rather than hiding in shame, I’m here admitting it. Going to try for one day tomorrow.