If I can quit porn, is it possible to go back to being straight?

Yes it will get better with time, but with how hardcore you went and how long, it will take a pretty decent amount of time. Certainly much more than 13 days

 

It sounds like you desire to be with a woman. The inner voice in you is telling you to change but your mind is wrestling with it. One thing that helps and that I myself have recently started doing is writing in a journal. My wants, feelings, desire to change. Get it out there and read them in the morning and whenever you see your mind slipping

 

Hi, I struggled to with sleeping during my journey.
One night I was so tempted I went 8h without sleeping the sun was rising I didn’t close my eyes.

Best thing you can do :
Be totally focus on the fact that at night, you should sleep peacefully, and that you may not think about fantasies
Take a cold shower just before bed, and if some urges come
The cold shower will help you to sleep without problem

i wish you the best

 

If you end up in some places is probably becuause you're somehow not totally straight. So i would rather try to accept it.

 

Yes, it's entirely possible; hardwork but possible, good luck

 

I am NOT AN EXPERT. All I know is what I have heard on NoFap, and heard in the general outside places.

I am most confident that feeding an obsession distorts your natural inclinations. The way you describe your progression into gay P is exactly the same pattern as those progressing into violent P and other fetishes, and even how sociopaths progress from torturing animals to murder. It sounds like you don't want same sex attraction, but your search for increasingly powerful stimulation has led you to respond to same sex P and unwanted attractions. It stands to reason that IF you can disconnect yourself from P and sexual fantasies for a sufficient amount of time, your inclinations toward heterosexual attraction will return.

The question, then, is how to make that happen and you report sleep problems associated with PMO. I strongly empathize, I had this connection as well in my teens. MO was a self soothing technique, and my brain did not want to allow sleep without the ritual. This connection was broken in Basic Training after I enlisted in the US Army. I assume the combination of an incredibly unfamiliar environment and pronounced physical exhaustion helped me sleep without a dopamine rush. I do not propose you enlist, but what you could do is adopt a physically demanding routine that will help your body crave sleep over a dopamine rush. This might be effective as exercise brings its own supply of dopamine, meaning you are getting the same "drug" from a different source. Running distance is an excellent way to accomplish this. Try a mile, then two, then three, and it's okay to plateau. You're not training for a marathon, just wearing yourself out.

I am less confident in this, but enough that I think it bears mentioning. US culture as a whole has been pushing to de-stigmatize and be more accepting of same sex relationships and behaviors. While this has been a welcome change for the LGBTQ+ communities, a lot of the information surrounding same sex attraction has been muddled. Some people believe that attraction ranges on a spectrum, it's fluid, and any attempt to change those attractions is a bigoted attack on that person's identity and harmful to that person. In truth a lot of people don't want some of the sexual feelings they experience, and with good therapeutic techniques, and in some cases just raw time, those feelings diminish or disappear. Some are perfectly fine with their attractions and that's also fine. If your P use, and the same sex feelings that may be a direct consequence of that use, are concerning enough to you, I'd recommend getting therapeutic help. If you can't afford that, it's possible an anonymous sex addiction group could work. Or, stick with NoFap. Whatever the case, don't shame yourself over it. Shame is a powerful emotion but counterproductive to any positive change you want to make, and shouldn't be encouraged. In any given moment, you don't have control over your sexual attractions any more than you have control over any other root emotion. You do have control over how you respond.

 

@Guyfaulx1605 Any updates?

 

Yeah. I'm curious tooooooooooo

 

Only 1 way to find out

 

Hey @Guyfaulx1605, I’m in almost the same boat as you. Same porn progression, and everything. It does get easier, but you definitely need more than 13 days to get back on track. You have to try really hard to take your mind off the gay thoughts and urges to look at porn. I was having the same problem, and after several weeks of fighting the thoughts it has gotten easier to ignore and get past them. I even had wet dreams about gay porn, but over time I noticed them start to revert back straight. Currently I’m day 37 no PMO, and approaching 3 months since I started my reboot. I feel like I am finally getting past all of this, getting back to normalcy with sexual urges toward women.

 

Second that. My guess is you've been feeding that fetish a lot longer than 13 days, you're probably going to need even more to undo the unwanted feelings.

But it can be done

 

I think that you can change - you just have to do nofap. There are lot of people escalating to bad stuff and recovered and so can you! God bless you.

 

5 months here had same struggle it gets easier it's just your brain desperate of high dopamine rush looking everywhere it can to get it in this case taboo stuff, first months are hell but if you're able to endure it'll get better and man, sex gets so good it's worth it recovering your masculinity and life. Be warned there may be some crisis points now and then for example when I hit my 90 day reboot everything seemed healed but then one day woke up and felt like day one again but it didn't last 3 months like in the beginning maybe one or two weeks and then I'd be n9rmal again, then when it happens again maybe it takes few days and so on but hey, I was addicted 19 years maybe it can be easier for you

 

I can only speak for myself, but it sounds like you might be gay but you are not ok with that. My experience is that the only people who worry whether or not they "might be" gay are, in fact, gay, and that's just how it is.

Speaking again for myself, I've disregarded men sexually my entire life - I am neither drawn to them nor repelled by their bodies - I just have zero interest, really. You know - the low voices, the stubble, the body hair, the penis - just not for me, end of story. Like if I come across a porno where there is a guy with a big weiner, my reaction is "That's a big weiner!" It's not "I want that in my mouth or in my hand or in my (fill in the blank.)

I don't ever worry about being gay, the same as I don't worry that I might secretly be black.
I believe you are what you are and the more you try to get away from it, the more mixed-up ye can get.

If you were gay, would that be a problem? Or bi? Or..or..or..please forgive me if I am ignorant, I am interested.

 

It's a very contentious subject, but there's evidence that sexual orientation could be fluid for various reasons. There's a lot of people on NoFap reporting they had heterosexual inclinations before abusing porn, but they escalated and seemed to lose their heterosexual urges and gained unwanted same sex feelings. Some people aren't strictly gay or bi, (or het), but their behaviors combined with plasticity of the brain has led them to conflicted attractions. The key here is they don't want those feelings. There is also evidence that good therapy, not that absurd, draconian electric shock/interrogation/shaming type stuff that you'll hear about from awful "conversion therapy" places that are rightly outlawed in several states (most states?), but good therapy, can help bring lasting change to a person's sexual orientation.

I agree, if a person is not bothered by same sex attraction they shouldn't be pressured to be het, but at the same time, if they don't want those feelings I think it's cruel to deny them tools to help.

 

My experience is that it is very possible to be confused about anything. And have doubts about anything, and that wouldn't mean anything definitively at all... I've worried if I had life-threatening diseases, was a murderer, and wanted to kill myself or my family etc. Forget doubting! Each time I was almost certain that I was the thing I feared. I forgive anyone who thinks like @BoraxKarloff, as I would have 2 years ago.

Now that that's out of the way.

I don't know your story, but having dealt with gay thoughts myself for the first time in my 30s I can say that the question of what my orientation is has come up a lot, often, incessantly... pretty much daily for a year. Just like Borax, I was never worried about men nor did I ever find a dude sexually attractive. But that didn't stop OCD from grabbing hold of my mind. I guess I'm just unlucky. Thankfully I still feel attraction towards the opposite sex and desire a relationship with one. Apparently, this kind of stuff happens.

Anyway, you say that you don't want to be gay, but you also say that you watched several different types of porn including lesbian. From what I understand if you find women attractive and are male that wouldn't make you gay. More like bisexual. Why are you so convinced then that you are gay? Also, there are lots of people on Yourbrainonporn convinced that quitting porn revealed that certain tastes were just fantasies. I would be patient with the labeling.

I also want to say that happiness should be your goal. Not necessarily losing or gaining any certain sexuality. One thing Borax has spot-on is that fighting your mind or thoughts or feelings is likely to backfire. You are better off accepting and perhaps with patience, your true desires will appear. The mind is a powerful thing. Best of luck to you.