The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Thank you. ☺️

 

Have you considered giving up drinking, even in social situations? I know it is not for everybody, but I know a lot of porn addicts who become lousy with their urges after drinking and even in social situations can sometimes go home and then relapse due to having alcohol in their system. I know that being the only one in the room not drinking can suck, but take it from me, in the end it is worth it. You don't have to deal with the after effects of being in a weaker state to PMO, and you also do not have to worry about drinking becoming a substitute for PMO (which I know can happen, especially if you have addictive personality qualities already). For full disclosure, I have never had a drink as alcoholism is prevalent in my family with my uncle being a recovering alcoholic, and my dad being an emotional drinker, and on top of that, I am an addict in general, whether it be the battle I am currently fighting with PMO, or the battle I won with compulsive gambling, and I do not want to tempt the fates and pick up an alcohol addiction. With that said, being the only non-drinker at a party, or with friends, can be a struggle where even though I have never touched the stuff, I want to try it just to be in on the experience.
However, abstinence from alcohol may not be for you, I just know that alcohol and urges to PMO do not mix because while urges can be hard to resist on a good day, while drinking, it can be near impossible (at least so I have observed). As it is, I definitely agree that if you drink, it should be in the company of others, so that you are engaged with that and not with your mind.

Just my two cents though, it is truly up to you what you do.

 

Day 6

 

Thanks man. Think the key is consistency, I have been coasting for a while and came precariously close to falling earlier, so need to get back to consistent reflections.

 

No PMO: Day 7
Excercise: Yes
Meditation: Yes

 

Day 3 Check in

 

Monday check-in

Sorry for the absence. I am actually on about Day 4 now and have just updated my counter. I had a really bad fall to PMO last Wednesday, basically a twelve-hour bender. I felt awful and ashamed. I am still recovering from the sleep-deprivation alone.

Basically something more structural has to change for me. I've been living life on autopilot for the past year. I think I've been afraid to make moves in life, afraid of both success and failure because I'm afraid of change. Too comfortable.

It's time to once again visualize what I want and set goals.

 

288 days

 

Day 3 - Had some small thoughts of PMO or MO last night after a stressful conversation with someone who was in crisis and who was engaging in destructive behavior. A friend and I were trying to help him, but he was having none of it, and said some hurtful things, and then ended the call. I then spent the rest of the evening talking to my friend who was helping me, and then I went to bed. During that time, the conversation weighed on my mind, and I could not sleep, so naturally thoughts of my old pastime came up, but instead of PMOing or MOing, I decide to put on some music from my childhood (prime country) and meditated on that until I feel asleep. Then this afternoon, after finishing one of my finals, I watched an interview with someone I follow, and then when that finished, I thought about searching someone on Facebook. That was immediately followed by thoughts of searching this bikini model, and that I knew would lead nowhere good. I decided to take a nap, but before I did that, I looked up something innocuous, but inspired by this train of thought which lead to me looking into the Bikini Atoll islands which bikinis are named after, and that lead to me reading about the history of nuclear tests and what that has to do with swimwear. In the end, I was able to map out my complete tangent and how I went from thinking about relapse to reading about the atomic and hydrogen bombs. And in the end the closest I got to bikini photos was through my readings on atomic tests. While it definitely could have gone bad, I learned a little bit of history, and then I closed my eyes for an hour and then got up and went and ate dinner. I do not recommend trying this for yourself as even innocent searching based on tangents around not so innocent ideas can lead to relapse, but now I feel like if I can remember thermonuclear war when I am in a craving P-subs (which is my main relapse risk these days), then I can probably do well. However, in the future, I think I should just put my phone away because next time I won't be so lucky.

Fun fact, the reason the swimwear designer named his new two piece after a nuclear testing site is because he wanted people to react the same way when they same them on the beach, as they would seeing the mushroom cloud rising in the distance - shock and awe.

Anyway, goodnight!
Best,
Mathman1994

 

Fellowship , I cannot control the edge unconsciously when this attack at night when I am sleeping, I cannot differentiate if it is a wet dream what happens or what happens in the real world, when I am in that state.
I saw some threads about this and some people are still counting the days.
I read the article too,it has to be a intention to be edge.
https://nofap.com/faq/what-is-a-porn-addiction-relapse/
Should i really reset?

Sorry fellowship, i guess i will follow other path, i can cast away now the P and M consciously but no the M unconscious thanks for all and the knowledge that given to me,i wish to all you the best of best.

 

Day 9,

Keeping strong and enjoying a YouTube workout series.

Bed time now