Opinions on dating apps?

They're pretty depressing.

 

I don't personally use them, but I have heard 70 percent maybe more of the females are overweight, and that its highly favored towards Gigachads/Turbo Chads.

 

It depends how you use the dating site.

It's fine if you are using it as a dating site, to try to meet someone etc. But are you going to use the dating site like a porn site? Are you going to start searching all different profiles, images for a sexual thrill, and then even worse masturbate to all these images at the same time? Chatting to women on the dating site while masturbating to their images at the same time?

What I have found when I have used dating sites is I probably use them about 10% as a dating site and about 90% as a porn site. This is why I don't use dating sites.

But I have friends that if they went on a dating site, they would probably be meeting a female from the dating site a few days later, week later.

They would go on the dating site to actually meet a female from it, this would be their main intention.

Ok fair enough some of my friends that would do this would probably mainly be after sex, but their main intention of using the dating site wouldn't be to use it like a porn site, it would be to meet up with a female in real life.

 

^This. Regular guys don’t have a shot on dating apps.

 

Yeah dating sites are designed to be addictive. They are a high novelty platform. Then that is tied in with the profiles, images of tons of attractive women, and social interaction with these women online.

Because of this dating sites is basically just another porn site to guys like us, and for me personally I find the social interaction with these women online makes it even more arousing.

This makes it unfortunate for guys like us, if we actually wanted to use a dating site to try to meet someone.

 

For me they have proven to be another relapse trigger. I usually start out with good intentions, but they don't work very well and can just end up putting you in a bad mindset primed for relapse.

 

What are they?

 

They are merely porn substitutes for men like us, in my humble opinion...

 

Internet meme directed at any guy who is good looking and gets a girl someone else wants.

 

I like Tinder.
I hate Tinder.

I have about 20-30 dates per year, always looking for "the one". But it gets really exhausting after a while, while I get more and more... picky, I guess.

What makes it so exhausting is that you cannot tell ANYTHING about a girl from just their profile, so that's why I try to meet up right away before writing forever.
As harsh as it sounds, but what someone here said IS true: 80% of the girls are overweight. But you wouldn't be able to tell from all the carefully selected, filtered and postprocessed pictures girls use for their profiles. Really, I have dated some of the most HILARIOUS cases of "Instagram Reality".
But it's not just the looks. Some of them write funny but are boring as hell in reality, with the charisma of a doorstop. Some are just outright dumb.

And what's most annoying: Most of them also become pretty clingy after just 1 or 2 dates. I just want to have some fun (and you know, if things go really well for a while, maybe THEN let's talk about more). But most of them are like "please marry me" after a few hours or actually assume it's a relationship just because we went out for a drink.
Hardest part is "breaking up" with a clingy girl who really is into you while you really knew from the beginning that this is definitely not more than a fling. Because I want to be decent enough not to ghost anyone.
So I created this nice template along the lines of "Thank you, I really had a nice time with you, but I don't want to pursue this. Don't ask why. NOT starting a relationship with someone is my default behavior. I would only start something under VERY special circumstances. I wish you all the best!" to get rid of sub-par girls who hoped for more.

Of course another annoying thing of dating a lot is that you basically ask the same questions a hundred times. And you answer the same questions a hundred times. Sometimes I feel like it's Groundhog Day.
Sure, you get to know a lot new people with a lot of different experiences and views. But especially the beginning conversations always feel the same. Up to the point where I often forget if I have already told X to Y or if it was Z I told that story etc.

Anyway, as much as I am whining about it. At 30+ with a job that makes me work a LOT and a country in lockdown without any clubs/bars/restaurants opened, it's not like I have much of a choice if I want to meet girls. So Tinder it is.

 

The biggest issue is that if you have problems with dating irl apps are not going to help you. Also profiles can be pretty depressing to watch

 

Absolutely. Maybe some of us can hande them but I sure can't.

Not that I'm missing anything. In my experience it's much easier to just go out and meet someone (not so much in Covid times of course).

 

Dating apps should be used as an 'extra' option next to your 'main' dating life, in real life. If you use them the other way around the apps will depress you. You will be too much invested, and the algorithms pick up on that. The app will send your profile to the bottom, and entise you to pay for better results. In short; you will literally pay for your neediness.

I do believe you need to have really good pictures to stand out. Women are very picky for several reasons. For instance, the men-women ratio is terrible. Too many men. Because of this, you have an abundance of men, and if you could choose from thousands of women, wouldn't you also automatically choose the most attractive one?

Also, any woman who is at least reasonably good looking doesn't need an app to get dates. She can get dates in real life. There are beautiful women on the apps, but they could easily be scammers, filler profiles, or deserted profiles due to all the horndogs sending pervy messages, scaring them off.

A tip.. if women have no or only a vague photo of their body, they're probably hiding something, like overweight. Same goes for their clothes, if they're loose fitting and specifically covering their waist it's probably because they have a big behind.

Also don't expect photos to be up to date. Last month I dated a girl and she looked a lot less attractive in real life than on her photos. And there's definitely something to be said about chemistry. You can have fun chats on the app, but in real life it can be a totally different experience. So just steer towards a date within a one or two weeks so you won't waste (eachothers) time.

And try not to be intimidated by photos, I mean, everyone puts their best photos on their profile, trying to look as 'perfect' as possible. It makes sense, but it doesn't help. I personally also find it tiring to chat on the apps. For some reason, it becomes so repetitive, it's also feels emotionless, there's no body language, no tone of voice, just emoticons and words. It feels like groundhog day with every new match. Currently not active on the apps because of this.

 

This.

After my divorce, I figured, why not try Tinder? In a few days I was always on, swiping left and right and after an hour or two, I would "run out" of likes and would have to wait 24 hours to be able to match again. The way Tinder works, you do have to pay to get your profile up. I swiped right for various reasons - as some just seemed interesting to talk to from their bios, others I found attractive. Since I was "desperate", I was always at the bottom of the pile - I was too worried that being alone after 10 years of being in a relationship would create a void I wouldn't be able to control. In the end, I figured being alone is ok and rushing into a new relationship certainly is not.

That helped me not give into the whole "pay now to find love" algorithms of Tinder, so I decided to delete my profile and erase the app for good.

 

Waste of time and energy. Might as well be buying lottery tickets. Become someone that can meet women on purpose and at will. It’s a lot more satisfying.