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71 days hardmode, had sex and felt like relapse?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Mr. Casanøva, May 15, 2021.

  1. Mr. Casanøva

    Mr. Casanøva Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys,

    I was 71 days hard mode, no P, no M, no O. Had all symptoms: mood swings, dead penis, fatigue, blue balls, etc. But after 50 days hard mode, I was having MW consistently, then I started getting really horny, libido went high, felt like I was cured. I had sex on day 71, was spectacular. Best orgasm of my life. But instead of progress, it set me back to the day zero: no libido on the day after, flatline, no MW for weeks etc. What did I do wrong?

    I'm now on day 41 hard mode again, having MW every day. But want to rewire correctly. What should I do differently?
     
    Anti-Hero and M Eezy like this.
  2. Mateus long

    Mateus long Fapstronaut

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    Hi there, I've had a similar experience following sex but one thing I notice I do is objectify my girlfriend, almost using the sex experience in the same way I used porn - for my pleasure, which led to having the similar feeling to relapsing in terms of PMO. I think focussing on her experience/pleasure and connecting with the person intimately, such as looking deeply into their eyes could be helpful in preventing this effect. Also, I guess it is natural that following orgasm, we may feel more lethargic after and this is natural, given that we are releasing what is our life force. I hope this helps mate and good luck with your journey!
     
  3. Enigma897

    Enigma897 Fapstronaut

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    look into Semen retention because an orgasm is still a release, you are still releasing your vital energy at the end of the day.
     
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  4. Anonymous86

    Anonymous86 Fapstronaut

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    Is a flatline after sex similar to a flatline after orgasm to porn?
     
    Mr. Casanøva likes this.
  5. I'm interested in this question too.

    I had masturbated (no porn, just imagination in bed) on day 44 after feeling quite horny for a week, and following that dropped back into flatline again for weeks.

    Is this the new normal, or is it an effect of orgasm while your brain is rebooting?
     
    Mr. Casanøva likes this.
  6. becomingreat

    becomingreat Fapstronaut

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    I've heard about this from many many rebooters on this forum. They feel great, they have sex and then they wether feel terrible or report their flatline symptoms have returned. Do two things:

    1-Do semen retention. See if you don't ejaculate will your still have flatline symptoms.
    2-Do a complete 90-180 days reboot and then start to have sex.

    And please report back because I see many have this problem. I'd like to get into a conclusion in dealing with this.
     
    Mr. Casanøva likes this.
  7. OhWhenThe

    OhWhenThe Fapstronaut

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    Think of your libido as a bank account. You started off with an abundance of money but over the years you've been draining it until the point of becoming not just broke but even in debt. You finally took a rest and started saving up and paid off the debt, you now had some money in your account but you then went and immediately spent it again, leaving you back at zero.

    Essentially what I'm saying is that although your libido came back, you had none in reserve afterwards. Next time give it a while before having sex again rather than at the first sign of your libido reappearing.
     
  8. Did your have sex with a person that you are in a relationship with or was it a hook up?
     
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  9. Mr. Casanøva

    Mr. Casanøva Fapstronaut

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    I agree! I'm now 41 days hardmode. I expect to feel horny again in 2-3 weeks, but then I will have sex without O, in an attempt to force my rewire to a real person.

    Awesome analogy. That's exactly how it felt. We see lots of people talking about how important it is to rewire, to have real sex. So I wasn't expect to flatline right after. Despite real sex, the O left me in debt again actually. I'm now 41 days hard mode, and still feel my bank account in on debt. But I'm almost there. My goal is to cuddle, foreplay, have sex even but without O for at least 180 days. My kegels are great, but I'm practicing again on a daily basis, to make sure I'll have control enough to don't O.
    It was my wife. :)
     
  10. Is sexy with your wife at regular intervals an option?
     
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  11. Mr. Casanøva

    Mr. Casanøva Fapstronaut

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  12. Got it thanks for sharing your story.
     

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