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Help with this depression

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Black_Knight 1998, May 17, 2021.

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  1. May 17, 2021 #1
    Black_Knight 1998

    Black_Knight 1998 Fapstronaut

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    Today is my 36 day and i only masturbated once because i was trying to do external prostate massage as i have a prostatic engorgement for about 3 weeks and i can't urinate normally, so i decided to do this massage under warm water ,but during this massage i felt that i really need to release this tension ,so i masturbated once. But currently I'm completely depressed more than before and i have a strong desire to hurt myself but i can't which is killing me.
     
    Black_Knight 1998, May 17, 2021
    Black_Knight 1998, May 17, 2021
    #1
    Abel100% likes this.
  2. May 17, 2021 #2
    Slimjimjones

    Slimjimjones Fapstronaut

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    This too will pass brother. Try not to do uhh..butt stuff. Meditate, workout, get those T levels up.

    Cheers!
     
    Slimjimjones, May 17, 2021
    Slimjimjones, May 17, 2021
    #2
    Abel100% and Black_Knight 1998 like this.
  3. May 18, 2021 #3
    cresyhorse

    cresyhorse Fapstronaut

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    sun bathing also increases T levels. take a look at your task list and start killing that one by one.
     
    cresyhorse, May 18, 2021
    cresyhorse, May 18, 2021
    #3
    Black_Knight 1998 likes this.
  4. May 18, 2021 #4
    karshup

    karshup Fapstronaut

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    why would you be so depressed that you want to hurt yourself? yes, you jerked but it is not the end of your life...come on. I feel we are not happy while fapping and we are happy without fapping. I think we make our journey really difficult ourselves by setting high standards or giving us this guilt trip.

    relax...you can always get back on the wagon and start again.
     
    karshup, May 18, 2021
    karshup, May 18, 2021
    #4
    Abel100% and Black_Knight 1998 like this.
  5. May 18, 2021 #5
    Black_Knight 1998

    Black_Knight 1998 Fapstronaut

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    İ wasn't happy at all but i won't say i didn't feel pleasure at the time of ejaculation may be for one minute or less. But right after that my depression increased. And I'm still trying to control myself and my depression.
    Because my mind is telling me that i relapsed and i have to complete this relapse. But have belief which is the relapse is not available option for any reason.
     
    Black_Knight 1998, May 18, 2021
    Black_Knight 1998, May 18, 2021
    #5
    Abel100% likes this.
  6. May 18, 2021 #6
    karshup

    karshup Fapstronaut

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    I can understand that you feel sad that you ejaculated but I feel you are being very hard on yourself. Instead of counting day...enjoy the process and if you fap and then get back to routine of no fapping again.
     
    karshup, May 18, 2021
    karshup, May 18, 2021
    #6

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