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Does it get easier?

For Fapstronauts who are disciples of Christ

  1. renewed trini

    renewed trini Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys today is my 200 day of nofap. I'm single so it's definitely being done hard mode. I have a question for my single guys does it get easier? Not saying married men have it easier, however they have that ability to release their sexual tension in sex due to being married. ( Side note: I believe marriage is a beautiful and perfect union and sex is a privilege in that). But for single guys who love God and want to honor him with our bodies, mind, thoughts and having a desire for sex is a healthy desire created by God; how do we manage the two. It's easy to say well get married, but I don't want to be married just for sex but for the joy of companionship being with godly woman. Probably seems like I'm rambling but single guys know the struggle.
     
    Sean Edie, Vir and Tao Jones like this.
  2. Bayes69

    Bayes69 Fapstronaut

    I really know what are you talking about, I want to use my body for God and get sex until get married but is difficult and also I want to be with a great woman that also loves God, so I think in this case we will win the fight only if we are as close to God as possible.
     
    Myfortress likes this.
  3. The problem is that we are bombarded with images constantly. Images that we should only see of our spouses. PMO and other images around us pack our brain full of stimuli and dopamine. I think the best thing is to get unplugged from as much of that as possible, including women around you. Yes this is hard but necessary. Even if you got married you would not get as much sex as you desire from your wife. Our expectations are completely out of whack. Your wife should be your friend first then the physical. We have it all backward. We consider the looks first and eliminate good candidates because they don't look right. Get control of your mind and body and offer them completely to God. Then he will guide you to the godly wife you were made to be with.
     
    Tao Jones likes this.
  4. renewed trini

    renewed trini Fapstronaut

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    You totally misinterpreted the question and carried it into another direction. The question is how to deal with physical sexual desire as a single man". Not referring to looking at women lustfully. Even when you have cut out feeding your mind with those things, how does a single man deal with the physical desire for sex/urges? Your response is like if I am fasting and you're saying don't look at food or be around food and you would not feel hungry. Having a desire for food is a God created desire, however there are seasons where we have to fast. Likewise in seasons of singleness how do single men deal with the desire for sex, in a God honoring manner?
     
  5. Sorry, the point was with PMO, it’s like we have been gorging ourselves in food. There is nothing wrong with normal desire. Most people in recovery here, myself included, do not have normal desire.
     
  6. I am married, so I cannot comment on this directly, but I have learned during other kinds of fasts that a good desire can be "put to sleep" for a period of time. Song of Songs talks about this a bit, that we ought to let sexual desire lie dormant until it is the right time to awaken it. Of course, once it has been aroused, it is very tough to put back to sleep, but I think it is possible to do so, based on my limited experience in other arenas.

    How do we do that? The same way we learn any sort of discipline, the biblical FREEdom process:
    https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zqVL11JjWICOHCRUDmqXr9TNC_gpb6yhRF1hKp-fxcc/edit

    Hope this is of some help to you! I'd love to hear your thoughts.
     
  7. Bayes69

    Bayes69 Fapstronaut

    I actually have the same doubt about this situation, because I started having sex when I was younger and then I wanted to do things the right way, not have sex until I got married but I know how this feels. That's why it's so difficult for me, I don't know the answer, all I know is that I can't do it but God can. He is my only hope.
     
    Tao Jones likes this.
  8. CPilot

    CPilot Fapstronaut

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    I am sorry, I don't have any recent personal experience of your situation but I am fervently praying for your continued success. You are doing something awesome! I am sure our Father smiles when He sees the effort you are making to do His will.
     
  9. Vir

    Vir Fapstronaut

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    My experience: overall, yes, it has become easier, and the journey has led to some profound and beautiful insights into who my great God is. Yes, yes.

    Has the bloody, painful war ended? No. I'm on the forum tonight as I deal with some powerful urges based not in lust, but just my body's desire for O. It isn't fun, and I would love to give in. On the other hand, I've known so much good in my relationship with God when I don't give in. I'd rather wait out the urge and find my Brother, my King waiting for me on the far side.
     
  10. CPilot

    CPilot Fapstronaut

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    I think one of the reasons I failed so many times before is that I held some element of belief that I could be cured of my sinful desires. I no longer believe that. I expect the devil will continue to tempt me until the day I die. However, my strength of resistance has grown and thus in this respect it has become easier. I think it is vital, absolutely vital, to realize the devil will always tempt us and it is only by constant prayer for God's grace to fill our hearts with so much love for Him that our evil desires will continue to be overcome. A day without heartfelt prayer, just one singe day, is a dangerous step in the wrong direction.
     
  11. Well said @CPilot the enemy is unrelenting on this side of Heaven but we get stronger and closer to our savior until we at last fall into his arms to be with Him perfectly forever.
     
    CPilot likes this.
  12. CPilot

    CPilot Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations! Your wisdom and insight are growing and I sincerely appreciate you sharing these with all of us. May God bless you today!
     
    LyarTheTruth likes this.

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