Question for men 35+

I don't agree with your opinion, but you are free to share it anyways like i'm free to share mine about this topic.

 

It's very hard to say what is "normal".

If I knew my wife was available/desiring sex multiple times per week there is no way in heck I would not take advantage of that and go for a month without initiating. So to me this is not normal. I am a few years older than your husband.

For certain I can say that when off porn my sexual functioning/responsiveness improves and sex is more satisfying.

 

@Trobone , not to sound weird but thank you for your contribution to the forum. And thank you for your clear headed appeal to the unnecessary post earlier in this thread. Ahem.
I specifically keep a lookout for your replies because not only are you insightful, but I want to find a person with that kind of integrity someday. The fact that you can even get to that from where you say you once were, is what gives me hope that this can be a growing opportunity instead of an eternal curse.

 

It's easy to sound rational on the internet. I have plenty of my own problems I'm sure my wife would love to not be present. I've caused her a lot of harm that still brings up painful memories and I'm never going to be able to fully answer some of her questions around why. She still does things that cause me to want to escape via porn, things that make me sad or angry or feel inadequate.

I just know I love my wife, and I love my kids, and my choices were clear: be better and make changes in my life, or lose my family.

 

Of course, I know you can present well here, but the rationale and empathy still cannot be mistaken. It's there!

This is the difference really.