Another newb

Good for you for recognizing your issue and wanting to deal with it, not only for you, but for your wife and your relationship. You can do it! I'm also happy to hear you say you can't do it alone, and I totally believe that is true. What I mean when I say I can't do it alone, is that I need other live human beings to interact with to help me. For me, that is a weekly NoFap group, SAA (Sex Addicts Anonymous), a therapist, and an Accountability Partner, someone I can call when the urges get strong or I'm on the verge of acting out. I am convinced you need to interact with others and talk to other human beings about this issue, preferably someone who is further down the road in this struggle than you. It is immensely powerful to speak your issue out loud, and get the non-judgmental support from others who also share their story. While your wife can be supportive, and that's awesome that she knows of your struggle so you're not remaining in isolation and dishonesty to her, she can't be the Accountability Partner or the person for you to talk to about all the issues of your addiction. It is a hard struggle, but one you can take on and defeat, and you've already started down the road by coming on here and posting. Please don't just rely on posting here and reading postings. That is helpful, but not enough. I think it is also important to read and listen to podcasts to attain as much knowledge about porn addiction and how to recover from it. A few of my favorites are Matt Dobscheutz and Porn Free Radio (www.recoveredman.com) who has well over 200 podcasts, Doug Weiss, Patrick Carnes and Robert Weiss. Take the time to school yourself on the issues and techniques that others have found to be helpful.

You can have the best relationship with your wife possible, but that can only happen if you stop porn (and for me, it is also stopping masturbation), and really work on connection to your emotions and building the emotional intimacy with her that you crave. I know when I'm on my deathbed I will not be thinking, "If only I could have masturbated one more time to porn..." but it will be of lamenting the time I wasted not connecting to my wife emotionally, intimately, in a sexually healthy way and wishing I could just have one more day with her and once last chance to express my love physically to her.

I wish you only the best and achieving the life you desire, deserve and expect.