I did the right decision, didn't I ? [ UPDATED ! ]

Yesterday, my whole family ( 2 Aunts and 2 cousins and my brother went to Holiday for 2 days. )

I was alone Today the whole time, I've spent it studying... My Uncle in his 50's came by and starting talking weirdly... Suddenly he asked me about weird topic regarding Sex...

He asked me if i had sex before in my life - My reply was No never had it.
He suggest me to bring a Hot Prostitute to home as everybody went to that holiday...
He had a store of Dimonds and Gold, so he must have known Hot Girls.

My answer was crystal clear: NO NO NO! NEVER! - Clearly as it is... I even went on to Lock the Topic!

I hate that idea in itself, I hate the whole crap to begin with, the idea of paying for sex doesn't cross my mind, I'm 28 years old.

I couldn't focus on studies afterward, my bring started crembling all of it's own! You miss an opportunity, Althought something inside me says it's wrong and i'm 100% against it! 100%!

Reasons why I won't do it:

- A promisse I made to my Father that I'll be successful! - Sexual Starvation is a Big Motivator! ( Especially if you never had it! )

- Finishing 1 Year of NoFAP as it's only a month away now!

- I don't want to switch an Addiction for a New One!

- I'm Against the whole idea of sex for money, It disgust me up to my bone.

- There is a mixed feeling of Frustration and Fear.

Just want to share this...as this is story i would tell my childrens someday...

I did the right decision, didn't I ?

 

Thank you, Thank you so much.

 

I made a big mistake myself for the past 10 years, I was focused on studies back than, My Father helped me Financially - He always told me to focus on studies...

Now when he's gone from this world, I find myself - at 28 years old with no real job, no money - It's like i came out of Prison instead of University...

Luckly , I will graduate this year, Having a Job and Making Money will be my number one target!

It's simple - People with Financial Freedom ( Car, House, Job ) tend to have alots of women, In my case - I feel like if i focused on this stuff instead i would have been successful, now i feel like i'm coming out of prison, Like if never successed in anyying with no money and all... It hurts.
----

About my uncle - Yea, It seemed a little weird...weird as hell...

I guess my aunt suggested him that after complaining about my NOFAP Journey many times...

About my country, well it's a taboo - But for People whonare Financially Free - They can do it, No Problem...

Thanks for your reply.

 

In order to have success, You must make a lot of sacrifaces - And this one is one of them!

 

I couldn't study for the rest of the day... My mind was spinning, But my Will is strong than my mind.

Fuck my Mind! - I'll follow Logic and my Personal will.

 

Oh yea, True.

 

In my case: Especially when I'll be off University - I'm looking to go after success.

This kind of offers shouldn't be in my Options at all!

Success is my Primary Target after University is over, I really wanted to break free from it a long time ago...

Sacrifaces are important... This one is hard to do! But I did it! My Goal / Dream is bigger than this! - I promissed my Old Man about it. ( God Rest his Soul. )

 

When Sex is Available a man loses his ability to become stronger beyond his limites....

Sex should be the a Big motivator for a man to achieve his Full Potential and become competitive as hell.

Porn was like that... It ruined and made us weak in the past, I won't allow it to happen to me again not in the 2D nor the 3D nor the VR, I'm quitting this crap for good.

I'm willing to go a full decade of NO PMO / NO SEX if I have to.

I lost my lovely parents...my home due to inheritage with many siblings from different mothers... ( My Father had 4 wives ).

I got nothing else to lose...maybe death will be my final Rest.

 

Girls usually always wait at the finish line to take the Successful Men, In my country it is the case.

Most Girls ( Girlfriends ) won't spend time with you if you aren't already successful ( Car, House, Job ).

A Prostitute is popular option for all men, especially the weaker ones ( Financially ).

For Now I'm broke, Yes Financially weak, I know within myself - That I have the Will of a Tiger.

Going after Girls ( Girlfriend / Prostitute ) is an ugly and very bad option...

I'll seek Money, I just need to break free from School, Honestly in my case university made me look weaker so weak... This wasn't my initial plan, it was my father's - sadlly look where it got me...

I hate to talk about this topic, but it was like this! He was the strategiser and I was the Warrior inside the Battlefield, His strategy got me to become a weak person at 28 years old after his departure.

What's gone is gone. The best is yet to come! I'm looking forward, As the stronge man never regrets his past he learn from it.

 

I've spent most of my adult life in universities.

I studies Business Management and Economics had Bachelor degree in it.

Later on I studies English Litterature and Communication had a Bachelor Degree in this one too.

Last year and this year, I've studied Finance - I will graduate if everything went well this year with a Master Degree.

In short, Studies have wasted a lot a lot of my time... It really burned years out of my life.

It was all a Strategy of my Father, Maybe because he never persued his studies, he made everything available for me to focus only on studies, the proper environment to create a wrak man was already there...

Study only! don't think about money, I support you! - Fuck That Mindset!

I wouldn't raide my kids the way i was raised NO WAY! - This kind of environment creates a very very weak man, I know myself very well, I would've been years ahead financially if it wasn't for that goddamn strategy.

At least on his last moments in life he confessed that i was right all the way...

I preffer a Life of Hardship over a Life of Good Time, We don't know what lays up ahead, It's better to sweat in Training to Not bleed in the Battlefield.

 

Thank You.

I won't.

It's just the Chemicals / Hormones that acreq up my brain, It's uncontrollable...

My stomach feels the same thing during the Sexual Stravation.

It's like my Mind want it so bad, But my Moral Code and Will and Well being are against it 100% !

It's true - The Mind - Is our worst enemy, All it want is yo make us Happy, It doesn't give a fuck about the future or success... I can't allow that.

Even my sleep got ruined, I wook pretty early today, don't know why...

It hurts when someone bring this topic to me, It feels like if them see me as I'm handicaped or something worst, I feel it's like a personal Insult to me.

I believe in the Semen Retention Theory, And I believe in the Delying Gratification Philosophy so much. When My Morals are challenged I feel uncomftable.

I tried my whole life to avoid friends that Party, Do Drugs - Alcohol - Smoke - Sex...
I choose friends who are similar to me ( Girls / Boys ) - I block any topic related to what i just mentioned especially the one related to sex adventures.

I block friends from my friends list immediatly if they started mentioning such as thing to me after a warning, I feel it's a direct threat to my well being, I need to be successful is my first priority, I made a promisse to my Father, Nothing should disturbe me along the way.

I don't give a fly f*ck... I will be successful even if i have to die trying that.