Social Media - yes or no?

I’m currently on day 429 of my reboot. I’m going to be honest with you guys and myself - I only stumbled upon this forum by chance. Before that I was going hammer and tongs on it everyday to keep myself on the straight and narrow which I now believe I firmly am. There’s no way back for me but the question is, how to keep going forward instead of plateauing? Until I got onto this forum I wasn’t really sure what the hell I was doing I was just so damn sure of what I wasn’t doing which was sitting around all day fapping to pixelated nonsense. That is what it is to me, porn = nonsense. NO SENSE! But I need advice/help on going forward. I am sill using social media but I’m not entirely sure if it is doing me any good - or bad for that matter. I talk to women on insta but nothing sexually related even though it’s like dodging bullets because someone is always alluding to it. I feel slight arousal when I’m aware that a pretty woman is interested or talking to me, but that is all. I’ve become quite skilled at side-stepping those landmines but something tells me it isn’t right. Simply put - is social media helpful/healthy to a reboot or not? Please guys, I’m in no danger or going backwards to the most undesirable place but the answer to this question is critical to me moving forward. Thanks brothers in advance.

 

Ok then, that is my next step. I actually have a desire to meet people in the real world instead of talking using my phone m. Because even though it’s not porn its also not the real world. Thankyou for your reply brother

 

Yes

i hope so brother, in the meantime I’m guided by yours and the like

 

To be honest this is exactly why I out this thread forward because I’m having success sliding into DM’s as it were and I wanted to clear it up before it becomes problematic so to speak. I’m having conversations with some beautiful women from my hometown who I know personally, I recognised that they are beautiful women but that is all. I’m not oogling their picture fantasising or anything like, I do haven’t to check myself mentally to make sure I’m not becoming lax, but 99% of it is just talk. I’ve also made arrangements to meet them in the real world too, lunch, the movies etc. So perhaps there’s nothing completely wrong about it but I have realised that I’m not gaining much of anything from it either. Dodging certain topics is the hardest part I must say. However I’m not making money from or looking to gain a following that would further me professionally or anything if the sort - that being said it’s neither a hindrance nor a help. Tricky one

 

So flirting is a good thing as long as it’s done with a real person in the real world and not over the keyboard - I hope this is a yes brother!

 

I think it’s obvious - probably the same reason we’re all here. I want a natural and normal healthy sex drive/life so I can engage in a fulfilling relationship and keep it!

 

I understand that my brother. I’ve gone past the point of fighting the urges. I don’t have any urge to masturbate because porn to me now is ‘ugh, why the hell

Yes my brother and thankyou! I’ve been strict in the sense I have not once looked at porn or masturbated in 434 days now! I have a deep conviction that tells me P means ABSOLUTELY NOTHING and I HATE IT WITH THE UTMOST INTENSITY. I’ve even tried to imagine a scenario where I might feel the urge and honestly I could not. It is jack shit and it means jack shit to me now too. Im definitely ready to get my flirt on but I still want to stay on hard mode because the longer I go the better it will feel. It’s more like a prison sentence - the more time your serve the more you will appreciate freedom when you get out. The difference here is this is self-imposed and by choice I am where I am. Choosing to stay on this grind and heal! That’s where my ultimate power is my brother! Sex will be great but at the moment it isn’t my priority. Neither are women. Stay up my brother!

 

Yes brother that is how I’m using it, to connect with people but I’m not busy oogling videos or searching out for novelty. If I see a pretty woman then I say ‘she’s pretty’ if I see a ‘sexy post’ I get an uncomfortable feeling which says ‘look away now’ and I move on. Granted this stuff is everywhere nowadays but we can decide what we look at. It doesn’t choose us to see it. The endless novelty of social media doesn’t interest me. I spend more in my DM’s than anywhere. I use it to connect online so I can perhaps arrange to meet up in the real world, discuss idea etc etc. If it’s not productive to what I’m doing then it’s not helping brother. Thankyou for the reply! It’s encouraging!

that I

 

As many days as it takes my brother. There’s still a few boxes I want to tick before I embark on the next step which WILL BE to rewire. When I first got started I told myself 1 year. I reached a year and told myself I’d go one more which will be June 29th 2022. Keep swinging!