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Slow reboot attempt

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by el_bsln, Aug 29, 2021.

  1. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Probably like most guys that watch P from time to time, I don't consider myself to be addicted. But I do keep coming back, sometimes two days in a row. Never more than once a day and not for long, but still. So I might be addicted or forming an addiction. I tried hard mode, but I found that it had an impact on my studying : I thought about MO all the time (not P fortunately), and all that mattered to me was my streak (never got past 25 days hard mode I think). It was extremely distracting and once I indulged in MO (w/o P) I first didn't beat myself up, but then the guilt lead me to bad habits including P - ironic, I know.
    As MO is quite natural for most humans, I think it's not a particularly good idea for some of us to go hard mode in the beginning, especially with a mild addiction. I think I could go on much longer streaks on easy mode, because eventually the problem is P, not MO. I could harness my will as well and go on a long streak on hard mode but I don't really want the combined withdrawal symptoms of P and MO to occur during school time and interfere with that.
    Day 1 of not watching P
     
    Abel100% likes this.
  2. Abel100%

    Abel100% Fapstronaut

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    Éxitos, para mí el modo difícil ha ido bien ...en el sentido que me siento ahorita en línea plana pero con erecciones matutinas... A lo que soy consciente de ella , se van.... Solo aparecen al dormir....
     
  3. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Just came here to report day 7 P-free. I also M less, paradoxically because I allow myself to do it.
     
  4. Incremental_Improvement

    Incremental_Improvement New Fapstronaut

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    I have had a similar experience of M-ing less once I quit porn 100%. I just think about it less and try to fill my time with other, healthier stuff. For me, if I were to go cold turkey on M, I think I would think about it more and struggle more. This way it is kind of fading away. Of course, I've had a mild addiction - more of a bad habit. I don't pretend to speak for anyone else or know what works for everyone. And I know P&M have damaged me. But putting less pressure on myself has paradoxically helped.
     
    el_bsln likes this.
  5. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Same thoughts exactly. It's working so far - 14th day w/o P. And I don't even think about it that often. Whereas with the same number on hard mode I was almost obsessed. I did get an urge today - that's why I'm here - but I overcame it.
     
  6. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Just coming here to report on day 17 without looking at P. I may be in a sort of flatline though, but I'm not sure P is the problem. I M less and less.
     
  7. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Day 18 w/o P. I'm pretty sure I hit the flatline now. Feeling numb and unenergetic.
     
  8. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Day 20 completed. Getting cravings again.
     
  9. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    21 days completed. I'm alone at home and I have tons of work to do. But I won't relapse. I've been feeling abnormally energetic/relaxed this morning. I don't buy the broscience stuff but let's keep going to at least get rid of the negative effects.
     
  10. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    23 days completed, I'm having extreme urges rn.
     
  11. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    I relapsed. Doesn't matter. I made progress. Day 0
     
  12. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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  13. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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  14. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Almost a week, again . Not feeling strong urges, but hey we're only talking about no P after all. Let's just take it easy. What matters is long term progress.
     
  15. el_bsln

    el_bsln Fapstronaut

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    Relapsed at 13 days. I need to be more consistent with posting in order to stay motivated and focused.
     

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