Does anyone else have a toxic parent?

A parent who you wish happiness for but often prefers to act miserable. Why would a person want to act miserable? It's a holiday weekend and I wanted to take my elder, disabled parent to the beach but I call and she's weirdly miserable talking about rain from days ago and bringing up negative stories from the news and says she doesn't want to go to the beach. All summer we've been discussing going to the beach.

It just sucks to want to help a parent and wanting that parent to be happy and frequently you see the person prefers to be miserable. I can enjoy the holiday weekend by myself but it just hurts. Why would a parent want to be miserable and why do miserable people always want to make others miserable?

 

I know dealing with someone who is toxic is draining to say the least. I am not a doctor but your parent sounds depressed , its good that you try to help them but in the end they have to help themsevels. I see you noted that they were disabled that can really take alot out of person it effects the persons mood not having the control they once had over things they used to do upsets them. I have had family and that would argue about going somewere if you told them in advance the best thing i found was to just show up at there house and say were going here there were ever .
Hope it helps

 

You're right, I will keep trying. It is indeed draining, I was happy before I talked to her. I know our parents are human beings and have their own lives but their negative vibes sure can rub off on us when they decide to act miserable. It can be draining but there are good times too. It just hurts so differently when it's a parent acting miserable, really affects me, even though she's hundreds of miles away.

 

Facebook groups are great! I probably used to be a member of that group. I’m trying to stay off most social media but might look into it again! Thanks for sharing

 

Thanks and I know you are right!

 

So What is toxic?

 

My dad is the toxic parent. Always miserable, hates his job, addicted to the news. He was also very stern and strict when I was growing up.

My mom is the total opposite. She’s nice and caring. But she will put her foot down when I’m rude or get in trouble.

Leaving my parents house was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I don’t need all that negativity and drama in my life.

 

Yes, people have told me that Patience is the key!

 

Well, i think she is acting miserable because she may has a problem she did not threat before, so she might neglected it and it rooted. I once experienced it. And about someone wanting another to being like such, might be because she wants someone who agrees and accepts the thought. Well, i do not follow the news everyday, so i do not know much of the problems of another communities, countries, etc. I think so much information is useless and unnecessary for survival.

 

If i had childrens, i would give them the best, not let them be fooled by the world. This is my opinion if i were a father, i would not let my kids being negatively influenced.

 

I think a toxic person is someone who we try to talk in a reasonable way, although they do not seem to care about and start to argue.

 

Yes

 

How do you face it with your parent, i mean what do you do when you receive such commentaries?

 

Answering your main question, yes i have one. My mom wants me safe, so she sometimes do not agree with my opinions, she tries to convince myself not to do what i figure out. In the other hand my dad does not care much, he agrees, talks about good possibilities.

 

Do you think she believes that her behavior is miserable?