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Casual sex

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by PaFappa the Rapper, Sep 19, 2021.

  1. PaFappa the Rapper

    PaFappa the Rapper Fapstronaut

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    What are your feelings on it?

    (No judgement, just your own personal thoughts, and I'd encourage others not to judge responses here.)
     
  2. Wish I was having more of it. Every time I’ve slept with a woman who I wasn’t serious about she tried to turn me into her boyfriend, until she realized that wasn’t possible and moved on. The hardest knocks came from the times I’ve slept with a woman and gotten attached. Or gotten into a relationship I didn’t really want. Broadly speaking I don’t meet enough women and am not having enough sex. It’s been nearly a year. What are your thoughts on it?
     
    PaFappa the Rapper likes this.
  3. PaFappa the Rapper

    PaFappa the Rapper Fapstronaut

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    I have mixed feelings on it. I think a lot it's appeal for me is connected with my porn use, and if I never got into porn, I think I'd be less fascinated by it. I have had some casual sexual encounters and they were never that fulfilling and left me feeling empty inside after a few hours if they were. I think it's fine if you and the other person have a mutual respect and it isn't just all about sex. Also, people like myself who are compulsive with porn I could see easily becoming compulsive with sex. I think God has gotten me out of some situations where it was about to go too far for me and lead me down the wrong path.
     
    Buddhism Is True likes this.
  4. I guess it depends on how you define casual. All things considered I’d like to settle in with a partner that I really like, but the the feedback I keep getting is pushing me in another direction.
     
  5. PaFappa the Rapper

    PaFappa the Rapper Fapstronaut

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    I feel like there's a happy medium on some level. I do feel like when you have sex (which I've heard people say abbreviates Sexual Energy eXchange) you should have a real connection with the person, whether committed relationship or not. It shouldn't be viewed frivolously. Once again, purely my experience, and I don't expect others to have the same experience. I want that to be emphasized. I've hung out with everyone from religious Christians to swingers, all views are welcome here.
     
    Vanquisher12 likes this.
  6. If you're talking about friends with benefits relationship, I would be okay with it.

    I apply these 3 questions in life:
    1. Is it illegal? No
    2. Is anyone getting hurt by your actions? No
    3. Does it make you happy? Yes

    If the 3 questions are answered in that way then I'm generally good with whatever you are doing.
     
  7. Squiddy

    Squiddy Fapstronaut

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    I have no stance due to me still having my V card.
     
    silex_jedi likes this.
  8. greenishmoon

    greenishmoon Fapstronaut

    Idk how to set the frame for that.
     
  9. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    I think is fine and can be part of a healty recover.
     
  10. Vanquisher12

    Vanquisher12 Fapstronaut

    If you love and respect a woman and want to make love with her, you should build a relationship with her and treat both her and yourself with the respect you deserve.

    If you're not willing to invest commitment into her, you're a weak beta male, because you're only interested in instant gratification and are afraid of putting work into developing true intimacy with someone. Modern society's a mess in part because of encouraging such degenerate behaviour.
     
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2021
    Khan_Jee likes this.
  11. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    wow, how toxic was this.
     
  12. Vanquisher12

    Vanquisher12 Fapstronaut

    Perhaps I was a little too negative, but I still mean what I say. I honestly want the best for people, that's why I take the time to post my advice here, but sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

    Casual sex is hedonism that still encourages the behaviour that prompted all of us to fall into the trap of PMO, just with another person rather than a computer/tablet/phone. It may initially release more dopamine than with PMO because of the physical experience, but ultimately you still won't get much of the oxytocin that would come from making love with someone you truly care for, and it'll ultimately end up being just as unfulfilling as PMO. It won't solve anything, as you'll still be a slave to your base instincts and a sucker for instant gratification, which at the end of the day is weak and undisciplined behaviour. Indeed there are people here who ultimately ended up trading a PMO addiction for a sex addiction because they were seduced by the idea of casual sex.

    Why live such a meaningless existence when, if you put the work in, you can build a connection with one beloved person that is far more rewarding and fulfilling in the long run?
     
    PaFappa the Rapper and StarRider like this.
  13. I just want to say that sex is not love so i don't think i will do casual sex, in fact i repudiate it, but i will still respect your right to do it. Sex based relationship is pretty much the same of casual sex, consume and get in the trash can. At this point i could also paragonate that kind of sex to porn. You switch from a girl to another, and you are never satisfied.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 20, 2021
  14. If we have to be honest there is a lot of people here that reach day 500 of "NoFap" just because they orgasm every 2-3 days with girlfriend, supposing they let thm have sex lol (or maybe with prostitute, escort, ecc). This is like Cheat. Is like if you go in mountain with the Electric bike, if you use the automatic mode or partial automatic mode, you will reach the peak easly, but you will not experiment the fatigue of reach it and the amazing feelings of have done it with your own forces, the experience. Maybe isn't the best parable but i hope to give you the idea.

    As i said before, i don't dare to say you can't do it, if you think is the only way...
     
    Vanquisher12 likes this.
  15. Meshuga

    Meshuga Fapstronaut

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    I had a brilliant, concise response, then the Internet ate it. Basically, take another look at @Buddhism Is True 's response. He's never had casual S. Either he wanted it to be more serious, or his partner did, and that's fairly standard from what I understand. Starting a casual sexual relationship is easier than maintaining one, and starting one isn't necessarily easy either. Between all the swiping and texting and flirting and ghosting, you either enjoy the process as much as the S, or you're looking for something a little more permanent than casual.

    I blame pop culture. They make casual S seem both easier to attain and more rewarding than it is IRL. So, whether or not it's ethical or moral is definitely a question, but could be not as relevant as it's not all that practical.

    Then again, I'm not a high quality Chad, haven't had a lot of opportunities for casual S and wouldn't take them if I had, so what would I know?
     
  16. Maybe so. I've definitely slept with women I knew I wasn't serious about so it was casual for me. Like I said, depends how you define the term.
     
  17. I'm not against it, but I don't believe in doing it often. I'd rather sleep with a girl I like and trust personally as opposed to the opposite. That way, if I end up accidentally getting her pregnant, I'm way more willing to commit to a woman I could see myself with than a woman I didn't.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 21, 2021
  18. iamShinra

    iamShinra Fapstronaut

    Casual sex Makes No Sense to Me, You're just Fooling Around and Wasting your time and Energy that's what I think. Instead Learning to Channalize the Energy and Using it in the Correct direction Is way Better. I believe in Sex After Marriage
     
    Vanquisher12 likes this.
  19. Meshuga

    Meshuga Fapstronaut

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