suffering from PE : what's best to cure it?

Hi everyone,

I am about to leave my girlfriend and become single again after a two and a half years relationship. I would like to take this opportunity to cure my premature ejaculation problem.

When my sexual life started, at about 15 years old, I had no PE issue. I could have normal sex with women. At 20 years old, my PE problems started. I am now 27 and have been suffering from it ever since.

My theory is that I have been masturbating everyday since I am 12, and got my penis used to ejaculating quickly, as I would orgasm as fast as I could.

I don't watch Porn anymore but still masturbate quite a lot.

What is the best strategy in order to have a healthy sex life again ?

I am hesitating between two solutions : NoFap OR train my penis to last longer again.

by training I mean masturbate without porn on a regular (daily?) basis and try to control my ejaculation; masturbate for at least 30min to an hour before orgasm.

What is the best solution between the two? I know I am on NoFap's forum so believe most people will recommend NoFap but I'd love to hear from success stories, or people who tried both.

 

Hi everyone,

First of all, I wanted to thank you all so much for your replies; It really feels good to get help from all of you !

Also I apology for the late answer.

Here is an update on my situation :

I finally decided to give one last chance to my relationship with my girlfriend. So I am not single as I expected I would be. We discussed the idea of going nofap in hard mode for 3 to 6 months. She is really open to the idea but she'd prefer to first try other alternatives. Therefore I have an appointment with a sexologist in a month to discuss the potential solutions.

I have also decided to stop fapping completely, and only have ejaculation when having sex times with my girlfriend; although I suffer from PE, she still enjoys having sex with me.

Not sure if this will help, but I'm also trying to build a habit in eating healthy, staying away from screens, doing sport, meditating...

We'll see where it goes ! I'll keep you updated here

 

Hi everyone, here are some updates :

So in the end, I quit my girlfriend three days ago. It was a hard decision to make, it still hurts, but I know deep in me that it is the right decision. We were not meant to be together.

I've started nofap in monk mode : no porn, no date, no masturbation, no girl in any way.

In addition, I've started a diet and I exercise every morning. I've also reduced my alcohol consumption drastically. Not that I was a heavy drinker, but now I won't drink when I feel I can enjoy the moment without it.

I feel full of hope and motivation. It feels so good to have started this journey, I have never ever been that determined in my life. I know I am building the best version of myself.

I've been living a happy life so far, I wasn't sad at all, so thinking that my beautiful life is about to become even better is such a thrill!

I'll keep you updated here!

 

Today I reached 2 weeks without fapping.

This is quite a small achievement, however I feel proud !

I have completely cut off porn stuff in any form, the only porn experience I've had is this book I am reading, Atomised by Michel Houellebecq. I did not know it would be such a sex-oriented book.

I found those 2 first weeks quite easy to be honest, but today is the first day I really feel I have to fight against the urge to masturbate.

I believe it is going to be like that for a few days until the urge fades away. Moreover I'm feeling sad from time to time because of the break up with my girlfriend.

But I'm still motivated, and overall very happy with my life and this journey, so I keep up the good work, the dedication, the mental strength!

I am going to make it. I am going to succeed. The day will come I'll be completely free from any kind of sex problem.

On my way to success!

 

Then it is time to start your nofap journey buddy

 

So it's been 20 days since I last fapped and something unexpected happent :

Only two weeks after I left my girlfriend, I was at a party with a colleague and we kissed. She slept at my place. It was a super hot moment, we were both very turned on but I told her I couldn't have sex with her right now, because it felt weird having sex with someone else than my girlfriend since I ended our 3-years relationship only a few days ago.

The thing is, I really like her and even though I wanted to take the opportunity of being single to cure my problems, I called her and invited her to my place. As I am writing this, she already slept at my place 5 times in 6 days.

I decided to tell her the truth about why I didn't want to have sex with her: NoFap, PE, etc. She completely understood and told me she'll wait until I am ready.

I am not sure this is a good idea to keep inviting her, my top priority being to cure my problems. I know I can resist the temptation of having sex with her though.

Any advice? what do you think I should do ?

 

Yeah you might be right, but I know I can resist; if she gets mad about not having sex with me then tbh I don't really care, I know what my top priority is! That's not very nice for her though...

 

Today I reached the 1 month mark!

I am very proud of it.
I feel that not much has changed though: I still have that weird urge feeling, and I know somehow that my PE problems are still there.

However I am very happy I reached that first milestone. From what I read from other's nofap journey, it is totally normal to experience an urge during the first weeks, and it should fade away with time.

In the past 10 days I did not maintain a very good lifestyle : my diet was ok but I went out every single night, having drinks with colleague after work, went to the restaurant and had a bottle of wine, etc. It's been 10 days since I last spent one day without drinking alcohol.

Next week I'll go back to monk mode, go out less and take better care of my body.

I did maintain a good habit of working out : I did push ups, abs, arms exercises everyday.

I'm still hopeful I can fix my issues... I'm not gonna give up now!

I will succeed!