The Lord of the Rings Challenge

85 Days clean!

My pull-ups journey went a lot better today. I even got a set of three in, plus a couple more.

Since all my workouts so far have used zero equipment, I've kept that theme and been going to the park near me at night the last few nights and experimenting with doing pull-ups on different parts of the playground lol.

 

Day 20
Entering Bree

Yesterday I had a real challenge, I saw an actress I liked on a YouTube clip and BAM, I just wanted to see her naked.

I did it so many times in the past... looking for leaked photos and stuff like that.
I didn't do it, but it took me a lot more time to relax and fully understand that even though it's not "porn" it is 100% wrong both moraly and for my nofap journey.

That was in the morning, at night I went to bad really early and planned to read in bad and sleep for like 9 hours. The reading went great, but the sleep was filled with both sex dreams and nightmares... not fun..

Anyway, I'm still here, with a bit more alertness than yesterday

 

Day 0!

 

And it seems bleeding typical that as soon as I get to Uruk, I masturbate and return to Nazgul. I know what the cause was (stress at having to revise for a boring course this morning), but I didn’t tap into it enough and apply my mental resolution.

I really need to work in building inner strength, I’m better than this.

 

469 days high king
538 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Only requirement is that you live in the county where the trial is and you are not a convicted felon. You can not say no. You get a letter in the mail that you must serve and that’s it. It was nice that the selection is over zoom now so I didn’t have to drive down there only to turn around and drive home when the case was settled.

 

Day 236 no PMO. Watched a show on Netflix that had some scenes that were on the edge. Decided it wasn’t a good idea so I won’t watch again. Didn’t have any urge to go look at P so that is good. Tonight my wife and I are staying in a hotel for our 18th wedding anniversary. I’m nervous that sex is expected and I really don’t know if I’ll be able to perform. I assume my PIED has worn off by now but my anxiety around failure makes me nervous that I will fail. Anyway… wish me luck.

 

Day 92

 

Hello guys, I am a hobbit now.
Working out 4-5 times a week, daily cold showers.
Need to re-start my meditation routine.

 

20 days
This time I'll make it to the 90

 

Your signature still says "orc".

 

Good job!

Yes, meditation is key for me, and so is exercise.

As for me:
Counter indicates days free of m and psubs-- I'm an orc.
345 days free of P

 

Relapsed. So badly. I didn't follow my plan, didn't go to bed when I should have. Did the old "let's just type the url in the search bar" thing. So stupid.

 

Checking in friends. Urges due to exhaustion today. Saw an actress I liked on a movie, started googling her, stopping now - bullshit because I have really really enjoyed the no PMO freedom of late. I had an absolute bomb go off in work, one of the worst in my career, and the only reason I have been pulling through it is because of the strength that the NoFap has given me - and here I was about 10 mins ago going to throw it all away - in-fing-credible.

Said it before, but never forget what you are doing here - you are fighting a fight that millions cannot bring themselves to even consider - you are legends truly

 

We can do this!

 

Day 74

 

Back to square 1 again, as I relapsed again yesterday.
Day 0