I feel there is no hope for me (Sexually inexperienced, and submissive)

It seems to be approach anxiety mixed with a fetish.

It seems that they are interested, it is not so bad then. Try to think about them as normal people, try talking about something not related to flirting to break anxiety. Do not refer to them as Ms. Maybe talk to a psychologist about your anxiety.

 

You are way to young. The idea to date woman is to go out to have fun like you do with your friends. Eventually after dating a couple of weeks or months (kissing, touching and having sex) the interaction can lead to a serious relationship.. and after some years it can lead to marriage.
Most woman are not girlfriend material, an even fewer are marriage material. So not only you go out to have fun with woman, is to know her better to know if she is really girlfriend material. Instead of going out to get a girlfriend or wife, you go out to have fun and really get to know her so you can spot red flags in her personallity. Is a total different mindset to approach woman and is going to help you behave more masculine and "macho" around them like you do with your friends.

If you feel that way, you are going to behave that way. If you behave that way theres no way a woman is going to be attracted to you. Woman like successfull confident man, be one. Work on yourselve to the point you start considering yourself and good catch and when you feel like that you are going to behave totally different around woman. Woman can tell when a man is weak and submissive and when a man is confident and have his shit together, they are going to take advantage of the first and chase to date the second.

You are putting woman on a pedestal like they are magical creatures you need to treat with special care. They are just humans like man are with good stuff and bad stuff.
The only way to be succesfull with woman is to treat them as equals, no below or above you.. just the same way you treat your friends and family. Be exactly the same macho man you are with your friends with woman.
Know for a fact that most woman are demaged, or have baggage or are narciccist and are the worst that can happen to you, so stop putting them in that pedestal.

This is only going to bring wrong woman to your life. Behaving like this is going to bring masculine woman or woman that can see you are weak and you can be used or taken advantage of.

 

Step 1. Relax. Nobody has the world figured out when they’re 19.
Step 2. Start getting more social to combat your impression of being a “introverted loner”. Even introverts like to go out and interact with people once in a while.
Step 3. Start finding ways to interact in groups that include women. Treat them as just other people, like potential friends. Don’t think that every interaction with women is some potential for romance or a relationship.
Step 4. Repeat as needed.

 

There is nothing wrong with being serious about relationships at a young age. I knew people who did that and it worked well. However the woman should be serious too.

 

There's hope for all

 

“One otherproblem I have is just being submissive to women”
You mean on bed? That’s not a problem AT ALL
In life? Well, consult a psychologist

 

No, people should not be encouraged to have sex outside of a serious relationship, particularly at a young age. That kind of irresponsible hedonism is what results in stuff like teenage pregnancies and is one of the main causes of today's society being such a filthy mess.

Indeed I agree here, there is nothing wrong with looking for a long-term relationship from the off, even if @Dioplleo_547 you're a bit young still for marriage. Indeed that shows a good deal of emotional maturity, and a lot of other people of our wretched generation would do well to have this desire. I myself am also looking for a sincere and committed partner. Of course it also requires that the girl is committed too, but like attracts like, and more often than not those girls who are only interested in filthy hookups will soon get bored and move on when they realise you're above that sort of behaviour.

We should not feel ashamed about such life choices - on the contrary, we should be proud of the fact that we are viewing such matters with the responsibility that they require, rather than the immature casualness that so many people of our time possess.

However, @Dioplleo_547 you should sort out this anxiety in the proximity of women. As others have said, treating women as friends is the best way to start, as not only does it help you to relax, it also shows the women that you're not desperate or looking for degenerate casual sex, and prompts them to be more comfortable around you. Additionally when looking for a partner, don't choose to ask out girls who just look pretty or have a nice personality, pick girls who you get on particularly well with and show real interest in who you are and what life you lead, because these girls are the most likely to be open to being something more than just friends with you, as if they weren't, they wouldn't be getting on so well with you in the first place.

Also, a word on 'macho' culture - this isn't real masculinity, it's the toxic culture that forces young men to have sex young to avoid being picked on and treats women as inferior. Real masculinity is about being assertive, i.e. respecting both yourself and others, women included.

 

It is ironic that some older dude tells to have fun, while the young are interested in commitment in this thread. I know people who are married half way through their 20s. It can be early for economic reasons not everybody can afford marriage at that age, but "having fun" until your late 30s or 40s is way too late, especially if you want kids. It's hard to switch overnight from being casual to being serious, both for men and for women.

 

Funnily enough one of my classmates got married at 21... I admire his aim to achieve commitment early in life, but personally even I see that as too early these days . For me a committed girlfriend is what I want for the time being, with a dedicated relationship for a good few years so she and I can make sure our bond is strong, before a slide into marriage in my early 30s once we know we can remain loyal to one another. I certainly don't want to rush into things, but I do want to focus on building commitment and handling responsibility, because only the truly strong can do so and I want to keep my inner strength up.

Also, too few people realise the importance of responsibility these days, and most are just focused on the instant gratification 'having fun' brings. I don't want to be one of them, leading a life of pleasure pursuit that ultimately becomes meaningless in the big picture, when I can work hard now to secure a future where I can 'have fun' with the girl I come to marry whenever I want to, bring up any offspring we have in a safe and stable environment and not need to worry about being alone for the next sixty-plus years.

 

No.. teenage pregnancies comes from teenagers that are not well educated on the use of a condom (and other security measures to avoid pregnancy and STDs). Also teenagers that are educated but are just stupid and think they can get away with no using condom. This can happn either in a serious relationship or a casual one.

Having sex is not making society a filthy mess, people make their life and society a filthy mess.

The idea is to know the other person before having a serious relationship. Knowing if you are compatible in bed before getting serious with someone is as important as figuring out if the other person have red flags.

 

Good one!

 

And one way they are doing that is by having sex with goodness knows how many different people without committing, which is what I was specifically referring to in my previous post.

Yes, getting to know the other person is important, but the time before committing is supposed to be for building emotional intimacy, not physical intimacy. The former comes first because it is the most important, the latter is something that should be saved for once the couple has committed and are sure their mutual loyalty is strong enough to handle it, because it is used to strengthen existing emotional intimacy, and should be treated as special and sacred as a result. If it happens that you aren't sexually compatible, you can then choose to either have a purely romantic relationship as some couples do, or to break up and look for partners that can better satisfy you both, it's not the end of the world. Intending to sleep with lots of people before committing simply encourages people to avoid the commitment in the first place, as they get used to all the pleasure and instant gratification of the sex without any of the hard work of the committing. This is the behaviour I refer to as being so much more commonplace in modern society, and want to discourage for the better of everyone.

You're right in that he is too young to marry, but he isn't too young for a steady girlfriend. Any respectable woman who shows genuine interest in who you are and the life you lead is specifically showing she is interested in forming a long-term relationship with you, otherwise she wouldn't show such interest in you in the first place.

Just focus on trying to analyse her personality and find out what she's like as an individual, and avoid dwelling on how beautiful she might be, because personality, and in particular how she behaves toward you, are the most important qualities to assess. If that still arouses you, think about something that doesn't, such as your general surroundings. Indeed your current environment and surroundings is a great initial topic to talk about with a girl you meet for the first time, as it doesn't put pressure on either of you.