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545 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Today I woke up, and realized I had a wet dream. I took off my underwear then went back to sleep as I was in between conciseness with my eyes closed and sleep I thought about this really hot girl that I had seen the night before and then bam I had another wet dream I thought it must have been a little but left over from the first one then after an hour when I wake up again there’s a much bigger stain then I thought. As soon as I had the second wet dream I felt kind of disappointed I thought I sort of relapsed because I was only lightly sleeping. I feel like the second wet dream was uncalled for I can’t believe it even happened. It was so fast I don’t even remember being hard I barely felt even asleep. I hope this doesn’t mess up my progress because I have been doing so good better then I have ever done before and I can’t go back to my old ways. Now I feel more lustful and I’m having a hard time thinking about the girl. Im going to go take a cold shower and meditate

 

Day 120 - Nine-Tails Chakra Mode

 

Day 2

There's a limited time event on FF14 so I've been grinding that whenever I have free time.

There were a handful of visual triggers that caught me by surprise today but none of them gave me an urge that I couldn't handle on my own.

 

546 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Day 14
Cold showers every day.

 

Day 3

Played some more VR and grinded the FF14 event some more whilst I was working. I didn't go out for my usual walk today because it's starting to get super cold but it's also getting really dark really quickly, so I need to get into the habit of going on my walks earlier. Tomorrow, I'm gonna be hanging out with a girl I started talking to recently (online, not irl) and then later I'm gonna watch Dune in the cinema with a friend, very excited for both.

Zero urges today, keeping myself very busy.

 

I'm not sure what happened here, I just sort of relapsed. I was getting into a pretty shitty emotional state because I was thinking about a girl who I'm not really over yet, and it led me to searching for dating sites weirdly enough. Eventually after a while of mindlessly looking at dating sites -which I wasn't even going to make an account on, I was just sort of looking at the site pages-, the websites started to become nsfw in nature and so I got very strong triggers from these images obviously. I immediately backed away, however, I just continued to look for more dating sites, when in reality I was just gradually giving into my addiction without realising. I think I was just in such an emotional and exhausted state I didn't even fight back against it, I just sort of let it happen, idk. I'm just really fucking upset with myself, this was such a ridiculously stupid and inexcusable relapse and I didn't even really learn anything from it.

I need to try to not dwell on it though and just keep moving forward otherwise I'll get consumed by these negative emotions, which will just lead to more relapses.

 

Day 83
Acquiring this new Senin power of mine sure takes a toll on my body. So today, i do not workout and recover. Urges and fantasies always play in my head but i always shake em off. Tomorrow, i will further push my limits!!

 

Hi, everyone!

New here.

Will work hard to become the real ninja

 

Welcome!!!!

 

547 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Day 122 - Nine-Tails Chakra Mode

 

Day 15 soon to be 16

 

Day 1

No urges today. The girl I hung out with didn't go so well, we didn't really click and it didn't feel natural at all. Also I didn't watch Dune with my friend because it got cancelled (somehow the cinema screen broke?) so weirdly enough, on paper, my day has gone terribly, but I'm actually feeling pretty alright.

 

548 days no PMO, semen retention

 

Day 123 - Nine-Tails Chakra Mode