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Relapsed after almost 1 Year of NoFap ??! HELP

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Furozima10, Nov 24, 2021.

  1. Furozima10

    Furozima10 Fapstronaut

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    I relapsed yesterday after almost 1 Year of NoFap
    Is this normal to Relapse after 365 Days ??
    The Urges were impossibly Strong so the only Way out was to Relapse
     
  2. I don't know if its normal but give your self credit for making it that long. I would suggest doing some kind of inventory of what led up to the relapse, you could look up a "relapse autopsy" if you need assistance with that.
     
    Banquiva and Furozima10 like this.
  3. Furozima10

    Furozima10 Fapstronaut

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    The reasons are still Mysterious to me i had some Incredibly strong Urges and I couldn't take it no more. I relapsed to stop theses urges.
     
  4. Zygfryd

    Zygfryd Fapstronaut

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    Hi Furozima10,

    I am new here, and hardly a specialist.

    I started a porn addiction therapy, and the longest time before relapsing in my case was 5 days.
    But first I lead a long therapy to beat a sugar addiction, overeating addiction, social media addiction, and internet addiction.
    And I won all these battles. So I know a little bit of how addictions work in general.

    My therapist told me, that if I relapse, the worst thing is to panic, and blame myself.
    Calm your thougts, deep breathing.

    Do not let addiction make you think you lost. Lost battle is not lost war.
    The enemy wants you to think you lost, to drop your morale, and lower your guard.
    If you now, after this lost battle, continue winning next battles, you are still victorious,
    and you conquered another scary dragon, cause you now know you are stronger than ever.

    Consider it a challenge man, it may be now difficult, but think how strong you'll feel,
    if you come back on track of nofap now after this mistake. Then it would mean you are a solid rock.

    Just believe that you do not want it, and do not let any doubt lurk into your mind.
    Localize doubts, and doubt them instead of doubting yourself.
    Be careful to analyse your thougts, note them somewhere.

    There are your thougts in your head, and the separate thougts incepted by your addiction algorithm.
    Addiction tries to re-organize yourself, for sure, but remember - this is not you.

    The both types of thougts are in your head, but addiction's thoughts aren't yours.
    You do not think it, it wants to make you think it.
     
    again and Furozima10 like this.
  5. PatrickBasedman

    PatrickBasedman Fapstronaut

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    One year is amazing! Great job! You have by no means lost the progress made, so I'd advise to reflect on what led to the relapse, and carry on.
     
  6. Zygfryd

    Zygfryd Fapstronaut

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    Dude, 365 days, it is a year. Exactly a year. Maybe this magical number made you think of it too much?
    Somehow it was not there every single day. And then after exact year you relapsed.
    I believe these urges are always there somewhere - brain remembers a lot, even though you do not see it every single day in your conscious.
    Sometimes if we take for granted that we are free now, we allow a small gap in our armor. Maybe it was this way?

    Just do not give up, consider it another challenge. Think of it - you did not do it for a year.
    You did it now. It does not have to mean you will do it tomorrow.
     
    again and Reborn16 like this.
  7. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

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    Yeah as others said don't worry about it too much. Sometimes when we reach a milestone or have a really great day, there can be this urge seemingly out of nowhere - as if to say "is that all I can feel, why not have a greater high?"

    You'll mostly likely be back to your normal energy, concentration, etc. within a week, if not sooner.

    The thing I would take away from this is to question why is porn still relevant to you after a year?

    When you consider porn use is often a symptom of other unrelated issues in our lives, such as loneliness or lack of direction. Are there unresolved issues that you think still need work?

    1 year is awesome! You may just need to make a few small adjustments and then this all can just become an old habit that's no longer as appealing as it was when you had those challenges.
     
    again likes this.
  8. Furozima10

    Furozima10 Fapstronaut

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    The urge came out of no where and I recently just had a Breakup
     
  9. again

    again Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

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    Sad to hear about your situation.. This can be a deciding moment for you as the "chaser effect" will be tremendous. I can't emphasize how important this time will be. I started this response as soon as I read your post and had not seen that others had already offered you fine advise so I just add my best wishes to theirs. I see that you are 23 years old so the urge must have been tremendous but you did go 365 days which is very commendable. Hang in there.
     
  10. Zygfryd

    Zygfryd Fapstronaut

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    Breaking up with ones partner is perceived by brain as equally traumatic as death of someone close. It is a severe trauma to break up from a relationship.

    Had you been long in this relation?

    In times of sadness, it is really easy for our subconscious to smuggle some thoughts into our minds.IIt just wants the pain to go away, so it seeks what brings the strongest pleasure at the moment.

    That is why people come back to cigarettes after being subjected to a trauma.

    Plus the magical number of 365 days must have player a role here too.

    Do not worry and do not blame yourself. You just made a mistake. But you came here, still seeking help, and still believing you should kick the habit.
    Your mind did not trick you into believing "naaah it is not that bad, I can just let go sometimes". You still are honest with yourself.

    Just stay strong, seek support of your family or friends maybe? If you broke up, maybe soon you start dating someone new?
     
    Reborn16 and again like this.
  11. Long Range

    Long Range Fapstronaut

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    I recommend making sure that you limit the extent of the relapse so that you don't lose all of you progress and momentum.
     
    Reborn16 likes this.
  12. Hello, first congrats on 1 year, not many guys here did that! I had exact same scenario few years back, I was completely clean for 1 whole year, but in the end I started to edge which led to a full relapse. Since then I had few 3 month streaks, one 250 days streak, and now I am on 119 days. I think every relapse is good for you, because from them you learn more and more about yourself - what triggers you, what situation caused your urge, and how to cope with that in the future. I learned a lot from my previous relapses, now I am completely porn/masturbation free and I feel completely sure this time I could go on for at least couple of years.. But the thing is - you never know for sure, we are human, one day you are full of self-esteem, the other you could easily slip and get back to an old habits. The best thing is not to stress over relapse at all, to think of it as a normal and integral part of your journey, after all, the goal is to work on yourself and abstain from filth for a whole life, so relapses are there to help you become stronger. The problem begins when you fall over same thing twice or more - then you need to change your whole routine or mindset...
     
  13. hydrothunder

    hydrothunder Fapstronaut

    365 days are a lot. congrats on that achievement. you should try to reflex on what led you to relapse so that you can be more prepared next time
     

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