I need psychological help

Read books by people who give good advice like:

Tony Robbins
Eckhart Tolle
Brene Brown
Stephen Covey
Napoleon Hill
David Deida
Sacred Sexuality Project videos on YouTube
NoFap Academy videos on YouTube

 

I have had similarly confusing feelings in the past. Talking to a professional counsellor helped me.

 

It's not about being smarter Julyguy. The fact that you have identified that you want to be a certain way is a huge step in that direction. In fact, if that's what you genuinely believe then you're actually being it, just try and follow through with things that you say you're avoiding, even if only for a short period of time. Then maybe try and write about it just to engage that much more with yourself. Every bit helps.

I've been in a bad place for ages and have only recently forced myself into a stage of action. Actually, although I was acting out, I was still consciously pushing myself to a that point of despair where I know from history I will finally act positively.

And right now my agenda doesn't involve stopping at all, but by just being more active in my day to day life , as a by product I'm naturally acting out less. And as a result of which my better judgement ends up telling me to just try that bit harder to either avoid it totally, or at least just sit with my urges a bit longer than usual and take serious note of what's going on in my body and mind before I do act out.

So I do, and without any pressure or epectations, and I just follow the feelings for as long as I think i can handle them. I ask myself where did they start and where did they go. It's so much less stressful than raising my bar of expectation so high that any failure is will be met with total and utter despair. It's also really nice to be that present that I find I openly and inquisitively take the time to spend a few genuine minutes with myself before I give in. Sometimes I end up avoiding it for hours and when I do, I start appreciating that I could actually go a lot longer. I mean why not!?

You got a great list of authors from SerpentEagleHear, so if you get a chance check some of them out on Youtube and look into their books too.

Keep the good introspective work up. Not many people have that quality!

 

If you want lots of response and feedback from the forum, post new topics. You'll get it.

If you want to stop fapping, just being a member of the NoFap won't do it for you. You have to take the plunge into the no-PMO lifestyle--and keep re-plunging as often as it takes. A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step.

 

@Julyguy Obviously, obviously get yourself an accountability partner. Everyone is vulnerable and you MUST find someone to share your vulnerability with otherwise you'll stay in the crappy rut you're currently in. It is NOT low or pitiful to discuss your true feelings; it is strong, brave, loving and inspiring - and just as important for the person listening as it is for you.