20yo addicted since 12yo

Well, hello there!
I'm Victor, a 20yo normal guy with a normal life (i think), but I had that problem since my early teenage... Yeah, it really sucks. (I'm sorry for the english, I speak portuguese)

I first met pornography by my friends at school and it became a lifestyle, since my 15yo (i think) I started to spent more and more time to it, sometimes I skipped a important homework to dedicate to PMO.

Now, I'm 20yo and I have some social problems, I think I dont have social anxiety cuz I can communicate well with men and women, but I cant construct a relationship, I just cant talk about my feelings, about my struggles and I just cant form strong bonds of friendship or love.

However I decide to challenge myself in NoFap after denying my addiction for so long. I noticed my addiction when I Was going to have sex with a girl that is really attractive, but I felt no interest in the moment we where there, I experienced a PIED and it's frustrating and I felt really embarassed. Then, some hours later I was able to have a erection watching porn and so I realized that problem I was neglecting for so long: My Addiction.

I'm kinda anxious right now, fearing that I have a ireversible issue or something, feeling that I ruined my life and lost so much time of my life, but here I'm at my 4th Day of hard Mode.... I hope I can continue and I can have my Sexually Healthy brain back again.

Start of NoFap 01/16/22