Catholic / Orthodox Fapstronauts

Thanks. I really appreciate it. I have a great devotion to Mary and the rosary.

 

Tonight I visited a new Catholic Church in my area (new to me, that is - not my regular parish church), which has adoration every Thursday from 9am to 9pm, with confessions from 7pm to 9pm as well. The priest I went to confession seemed really down to earth, intelligent, familiar with the vocabulary for recovery, and quite understanding of what I have been going through - we just had a wonderful human exchange and dialogue, and he helped remove the shame always associated with the sexual sins. Because I had mentioned the Church Fathers at one point, he left me at the end with a quote from St. Irenaeus: "The glory of God is man fully alive." And sin is just the opposite of that - it takes away from being fully alive.

So, I leave you with the same words, brothers. God Bless you all.

 

What a beautiful account, Joe! I wish you strength as you draw on your virtues to pull you through the seemingly constant temptations of immoral sex. In addition, I would like to share this quote from a book I am now reading called Boys to Men the Transforming Power of Virtue

“God nor His Church are against sex; it is just the abuse or inappropriate use of sex that is prohibited. Here is an analogy to make the point. Fire of itself is not bad or good, it depends on its context and use. For example, fire in a fireplace is good; it brings both warmth and light to the home. But if the fire is taken out of its proper context, and is sparked in the kitchen or bedroom, the fire does not warm so much as consume and, instead of lighting up the house, it belches out smoke and flame that not only damages but can kill. Fire in a house should be in the fireplace. Sex and sexual passion are like that fire. In the proper context of marriage, like fire in the fireplace, sex is a great good. But taken out of that context, it is a consuming and deadly fire. It does not take much for the sparks of sexual passion to fan into an uncontrollable blaze. In the end, sex outside of marriage is as destructive as a fire, and such fire has ravaged many a home.”

Excerpt From: Tim Gray and Curtis Martin. “Boys To Men The Transforming Power of Virtue.” Emmaus Road Publishing, 2001-01-01. iBooks.
This material may be protected by copyright.
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This type of literature gives me so much strength against the temptations of PMO, and I find myself reading them (in addition to lots of Prayer) so I can combat those cancerous desires.

I wish you great strength, Joe, as we all fight the raging fires of sin.

Peace always

 

It is important to re-call that the 2nd commandment Jesus cited as the greatest was, 'love your neighbor as yourself'. Inherent in this command is that we love ourselves. And that means we need to nourish ourselves- spiritually, physically, and socially. It can be difficult to balance this with getting outside of our selves so we can care for others.

An Abba or Spiritual Director helps to guide our actions in finding this balance.

 

in a group dedicated to chastity that i used to attend, there we often talked about the not wanting to let our pastors know so much about our sins and having greater comfort telling things to an 'unrelated' priest. for me, it has always been the opposite. 1st, i am very steeped in the concept of confessing to Jesus Who knows my sins even better than me, so who the priest is, is not important. but 2ndly, i like to confess openly to my pastor because then he is in a better place to give me guidance. especially for those sins which i keep bringing to the Lord.

 

ii am sorry that this was your (and too many others) experience. the failings of those in authority, both in and out of the Church, is horrific. and has left so many without a positive link to the house of the Great Lover of Mankind.
we need to pray for those damaged in this way, those priests who damaged them, the faithful who let the damage occur. without begging that this damage be healed, we assume a role in that damage.

and we also need to pray for all those who are in similar positions today. Satan will seek to continue fomenting this destruction.

 

always keep in mind that God reads our hearts, not our lips.
Peace!

 

I say "Amen," Funky! Be a man, buck up and do what you know you have to do, and you will find that a lot of good will come out of it. I totally agree that your parish priest be used for exactly the same reason you stated. Two weeks ago, I made my first confession in more than 35 years, and I made an appointment with the local priest. We had a great talk prior to Confession through which I told him pretty much my life story. Then I dug out a printed "Examination of Conscience" form and started right down the line as I had committed nearly all of the sins listed. At one point I read a sin and said, "Hey, I didn't commit that sin!" We both laughed. At any rate, I did not withhold anything, and I included every detail that came to my mind. Afterward, the priest told me that my Confession was a very heartfelt and powerful one, and he left me with a comment that I will never forget: "I can assure you as a member of this Church, you will never walk alone." Now you won't get that type of interaction by avoiding your local Church and attending a distant one incognito. Confession is meant to heal YOU. Your local priest will make it the very best experience possible for you, and you will feel wonderful afterward. Try it, you'll like it!

Peace always

 

Hey you guys, I have discovered a great Catholic resource for books, audio, and video educational materials. It's called formed.org. This site normally assesses a monthly charge to access the site, but there are exceptions. I am attending a Catechism class, and the instructor gave us students business cards with a Parish Code that allows us complete access for free. See if your parish subscribes to this site, and if they do, I'll bet you could get your own parish code. I cannot wait to explore the resources offered on Formed.org. So far I've uploaded a book called Boys to Men the Transforming Power of Virtue. This book is meant for younger folks I think (I'm 58 years old), but honestly I've learned so much and there have been many parts that seem to speak directly to me (including a large section that deals with marriage, chastity, sexual sin, and just the sort of stuff we deal with on this site). I also noticed they had some materials on 33 Days to Morning Glory which a member mentioned on this thread. This site is going to occupy me for some time to come, and I know I'll gain a treasure trove of knowledge from it.

Peace

 

Denying yourself access to the evil source (PMO) is key if you ever have any aspirations of defeating this evil. If you must have access to data through your Smartphone for apps such as GPS,
etc., but not necessarily the Internet, then you must have the Internet app, which is a system/default app, disabled by someone who knows how to gain root access to your phone and do it. Do
what it takes brother, that is the key to win this war within your mind. You must have ZERO TOLERANCE, NO PERMISSION, otherwise you will continue to succumb to this.

 

Thanks 'Leo33' for starting this forum. We as brothers in the faith share in our war against this common enemy. This is a daily and grinding 'battle' against our minds.

Blessings to you and all of us in need of encouragement and strength to conquer this malady.

 

"1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV / 30 helpful votes
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it"

RUN my friend, RUN from temptation. Having SMARTPHONE access to PMO is like 'the fox guarding the hen house'. Everything begins, and ends with our eyes. That is one step you MUST take if you are ever to come even close to being prepared to do battle against PMO. It is a decision no one can or will make for you. It is ALL YOURS beginning TODAY.

 

Hello, All!

Thought these words from Pope Francis' Address to Students yesterday in Havana were appropriate to us:

Hope speaks to us of a thirst, an aspiration, a longing for a life of fulfillment, a desire to achieve great things, things which fill our heart and lift our spirit to lofty realities like truth, goodness and beauty, justice and love. But it also involves taking risks. It means being ready not to be seduced by what is fleeting, by false promises of happiness, by immediate and selfish pleasures, by a life of mediocrity and self-centeredness, which only fills the heart with sadness and bitterness. No, hope is bold; it can look beyond personal convenience, the petty securities and compensations which limit our horizon, and can open us up to grand ideals which make life more beautiful and worthwhile. I would ask each one of you: What is it that shapes your life? What lies deep in your heart? Where do your hopes and aspirations lie? Are you ready to put yourself on the line for the sake of something even greater?

May we all enjoy the life-giving Spirit of Hope!
Peace

 

Hey! Here is an interesting website I found while looking for pictures.

There are thoughts and teachings about life in general, also the relation between God and his creature.

http://www.devothoughts.com/category/devotional-post/

 

As I keep looking for new insights and strategies to combat my PMO addiction (I call it like it is), I found the following article by Veronica Granja-Sierra in how
to conquer our inner demons, and we have many of them trying to lure us back into PMO. These should be reminders for all of us. Let's not EVER give up as this is
a daily battle for our lives.

4 Beautiful Ways To Drown Out Your Inner Demons
Veronica Granja-Sierra

We have all experienced those voices in our head, those emotions and feelings that cover us in a shadow of darkness and manifest into our lives: they are known as our inner demons.

It’s a battle that goes on inside all of us, whether it be our fears, sadness, anxiety, frustrations and disappoints tormenting us and preventing us from experiencing happiness, peace, love and hope. Just like with every battle there are two options: you can choose to hide from these demons and negative energies or you can choose to fight these demons and confront and conquer them.

Sometimes it’s hard to see the light in the tunnel especially when we are struggling with student debt, finding a job after graduation, and affording to put gas in your own car. We tend to compare ourselves and fall short to our very own expectations, and that is when we let our inner demons take over. We become negative beings with pessimistic thoughts, and feel that the world has gotten the best of us and so we lose all the strength to battle it. These inner demons inevitably start to lead us to insecurity, failure and unhappiness. But rest assured, that even in our most desperate and darkest of times, there will always be a light in which you will conquer the happiness you deserve.

1. Remember your dreams & ambitions.
Obstacles will come that will try to block you or send you off course, but realize that whatever it is, you can and will get through them. We all have that internal flame within us that overpower when we least expect them to and help us get through any situation. Find your ambition, find whatever motivates you and inspires you and don’t let it go. We all have dreams and goals that we wish to accomplish and just remember that the only way to attain them is to never forget about them and never give up, no matter how much we feel like giving up.

2. Stay strong & fearless
Derive all the strength you have and fight for what you want. You CAN do this, but putting your head down and letting your negative demons take over will not get you far. Remember that your only fears are the ones that you give yourself so don’t hold yourself hostage by clinging on to your same old fears and anxieties. Your fears can be your very own trap or prison, holding your happiness and dreams out of your reach.

3. Stay positive.
Focus on being optimistic and learn to expect the best in life. Our inner demons prey on our weaknesses, so the more powerful we feel the easier it is to defeat those negative inner emotions. You will lead yourself to success when you start to focus on the positives rather than on the negatives. Focusing on all the bad things in your life and making yourself the victim in your own life story will only feed your demons and dig you deeper and deeper into your own hole.

4. Don’t settle.
We are all scared of what the future holds and the questions we ask ourselves sometimes trouble us and we so we rather not deal with them. Our inner demons such as anxiety, fear, and feelings of not being good enough, give us excuses to hold ourselves back from applying for that dream job, or jumping into a new relationship, or whatever it may be. So we stay complacent and we settle because dealing with these demons would mean facing our own weaknesses and insecurities. But without facing the uncertainties of the future, we will never be able to pursue our destinies; we will never be able to learn; and we will never be able to grow.

Let's defeat them demons Fapstronauts and I end with the prayer to St. Michael:

 

Thank you for that very powerful post. It truly inspired me. Paul is spot on when he says God will not tempt me above my ability. For selfish reasons I deny God and continue with P. I am looking in to disabling root access to my phone, I am just unsure how. For now, I have applied restrictions but obviously I can override them. What is your personal experience with internet on smartphone? Did you have to disable it or did you have the will to overcome it on your own?

Thank you again for your response!

 

Hi 'Dumpsterdiver', I am glad you are willing to take the necessary steps to deny your brain of the source material it wants to continue to feed the addiction from. In my case I force stopped internet access and am continuing to investigate how to root disable it. In the interim it prevents you from caving in easily and buys you time to 'ride' the wave of an urge to seek porn until it subsides. I have also learned tactics from other Fapstronauts to: always have my phone in full view of my family; never take it to the bathroom; shut it off when in my car or home alone. Clearly these are 'voluntary' steps I am taking, among other strategies such as 'gaining knowledge' about my/our enemy. You 'must' respect this enemy. It is perhaps the fiercest one you will face as in my view the 'Devil' is going along for the ride, enjoying the havoc it is creating among us God's creation because it wants to see us destroyed. One very powerful resource is www.yourbrainonporn.com. Learn about how PMO has rewired your brain, and how it can become normal over time.

There is always a 'geek' among us that knows how to work these Smartphones inside and out so ask around. This is a hard fight, no sugar coating it here, but you can succeed if you commit to; learn about your enemy; learn and apply strategies/recommendations you will find among us in this forum and many others. I welcome you to read my journal entries and create one for you as well to tell us how you are doing. Commit yourself to fight this fight hard, but only one day at a time. This is a lifelong journey, so set milestones along the way in a way that makes them achievable (example: 30 days of no P M O). The key is to start and take measures to shut down access.

Blessings to you my friend. YOU are NOT ALONE.

 

From the book Boys To Men The Transforming Power of Virtue I read the following passage:

“Over time, through God’s grace and our arduous effort, we can build up the habits that dispose us to be virtuous. This positive inclination, which the virtues bestow upon us, along with the grace of God, liberates our will to do the good we desire to do, rather than capitulating to our passions. This is what Saint Paul meant when he spoke of the “glorious liberty of the children of God” (Rom. 8:21). In the end, the moral life is about liberty or slavery: the liberty that comes only through virtuous living (acting according to a properly ordered nature), or the slavery that comes from surrendering to our passions and desires (acting according to a disordered nature).”

Excerpt From: Tim Gray and Curtis Martin. “Boys To Men The Transforming Power of Virtue.” Emmaus Road Publishing, 2001-01-01. iBooks.
This material may be protected by copyright.
​

Successfully defeating PMO will result in FREEDOM not restrictiveness. We must work toward gaining good standing with the Holy Spirit so He can inspire us to take on our addictive behaviors. If we bring God into the battle on our behalf, it only stands to reason that we stand a much better chance at success. This happened almost accidentally for me, but in hindsight I believe it was in fact Divine Intervention to some degree. He knew that I needed His assistance to have any sort of chance of success.

Be strong my brothers and sisters, but be willing to invite God into your life as He will shoulder the worst of the burden, and He will walk with you as you address your demons.

May the peace and love of Christ be with you

 

Hi guys!

I am a 28 years old man from Germany and I would like to join the conversation!

Ever since I converted to catholicism some years ago Christ´s demand for chastity and purity have been an unbearable challenge for me. Or even worse: There are times when I really want to sin, because I know for myself that I would never be able to stop. This sin affects my whole spiritual life, since I am not able to pray after sin, or to beg for forgiveness, or to go to confession. This results in the absurd situation, that I really WANT to live the catholic faith, that I want to wear "the armor of god" and live a life fully dedicated to Christ, but because of this sin I fail all the time, also in other fields (like, for example, lent). I am sure that it would be far more easy for me to fulfill the commandments of the church (ALL of them, because that is what we are called to) if I would not have this sexual habit. A big problem for me is, that I am always very scared to go to confession. I started to visit several priests to "hide the problem" and I don't want them to see me going to confession every week and confess always the same sin. I know that this is bullshit, since we are not confessing to the priest, but to Christ, and he already knows all our sins, but that is the only way I can deal with it. How do you do it?

Since a few month now I stopped going to confession for two reasons: I thought it would be pathetic for a 28 old man to jump from priest to priest, just because I am scared of what the priest thinks of me. Secondly, there was a time when I was lacking repentance and we all know that there is no absolution without repentance...
Useless to say that I of course have not been to communion since a long time (the last communion I received at easter)

BUT (and this BUT is the reason why I am writing this) I started again to stop! It is now 6 days since my last sin (in this field) and until now I feel very fine. I hope that I find the courage to go to confession next week and after that we will see...

So again this question: How do you manage to confess?

 

Sanguinos, just do it.
I Made the mistake at one point of believing I wasn't really sorry and not going to confession. It isn't about feelings, do you want to avoid hell? Do you dislike the fact that you're sin is ugly? If so you have imperfect contrition but that's enough to go to confession. And once you do you will receive grace to help repent and have sorrow for better less selfish reasons.