I relapsed and learned something

Entertainment can be so triggering, especially if it's from the internet. I myself find some comfort in writing poetry or short stories. I find that I get triggered and tempted a lot by videos and images that have depictions of women. I feel that a lot of entertainers use unreal depictions of women to attract consumers.

I also like playing video games and observing video games on Youtube. I like Super Mario and other video games that are not graphic. Video games have an ESRB rating that I pay attention to. But basically I avoid games that have a lot of female human depictions.

I've thought of watching cartoons, especially those with animal characters, but I don't know. I really liked the Sonic Boom cartoon series. I might watch cartoons based on video games, especially if they have mostly animal characters.

 

Your focus seems to be on all the things you should not do. What about focusing on all that you gain when you set P and MO aside and stop making lust and sex your god? What about focusing on all that you become free to enjoy once lust is dead within you? If discipleship was only about giving things up, no one would last very long at it. We must indeed deny ourselves, but then we get to take up our cross (engage in the good work God has prepared in advance for us to do), and follow him! There is no adventure like it, no friendship as real or close as the one we enjoy with Christ! But we cannot see this clearly when our minds are clouded by lust.

 

I think you have made some important observations. In my case, taking a rational look at my behavior led me to recognize the root causes of my relapses/falls. So, you are on the right path and you must make your own, personalized, plan to fight inevitable temptation. It is impossible to rid temptation entirely from our lives but it is possible to minimize it and more importantly be ready to flee from it as soon as the first glimmer reaches our eyes or our thoughts.

However, there is more to realizing freedom than minimizing our exposure to temptation. We need to sustain our determination and we need help. Sincere and frequent prayer is the fuel for this. Pray from your heart each and every day, even when you are not being tempted. In this way, we bring ourselves back to God and build our relationship with Him. Also, when tempted, ask Christ to fight these temptations for you with more quiet and sincere prayer. Continue praying as long as it takes for the temptations to pass.

In these ways, your success is guaranteed.

 

"He must become greater, I must become less" is always a good path to be on. Just don't focus on the "less" so much that you forget about the "greater" entirely. Our focus can safely be on Christ alone. He will take care of us, so we can entrust ourselves to him without reservation or any concern for looking after ourselves on our own terms.

Written communication is hard, and I apologize if all of this is in your head and heart already and I have simply misunderstood your original post. if so, please forgive me, and let's hope that someone else may read our correspondence in the future and benefit from it in some way!

 

I would ay that it's 2 at first, as we begin trading in our head full of lies for Christ's truth. As time goes on, it is 3 more and more, because you will know what a lie sounds like intuitively and immediately. Our ultimate, sole focus is Christ himself.

John 3
14 And as Moses lifted up the bronze snake on a pole in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, 15 so that everyone who believes in him will have eternal life.
(We look to Christ and live!)

John 6
28 They replied, “We want to perform God’s works, too. What should we do?”
29 Jesus told them, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.”
(We believe in someone in order to live the Kingdom life. This implies there are many others we do not believe in, of course, but they are not our focus.)

And there are many, many other Scriptures along these lines.

Just as we see by the light of the sun, so our lives are illuminated by Christ. We do not need to spend much time consciously banishing the darkness if our hearts are filled with Light.

 

I feel that @TaoJones is spot on here. The process of beginning with step 2 and moving to step 3 mirrors my experience exactly. Beginning at Step 1 is unlikely to be a sustainable process; I tried and failed there many times.

I categorize myself as beyond step 2 but not fully to step 3. I expect this is the process God has tailored for me to cleanse my mind and my heart after my extensive history of sin. Yesterday, I lamented a bit about why it is I must continuously curb my eyes from images I don't want but I was quickly reminded that my days of freedom amount to only about 3% of the days that I was enslaved to this sin. Frankly, when I consider that, I am amazed and grateful that Our Lord has kept me in His arms so reliably over the last 18 months.

I am sure the path to freedom is not the same for each of us and there are those who are freed in a flash but there are others, like myself, where the path has been a very long one and thus patience and perseverance are key requirements for success. With only a little thought, I can see why God has chosen this particular path for me. Patience has never been one of my traits but God wishes for me to learn this skill.