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I see improvements on nofap; fear of touching and flirting sexually

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Kjs2015, May 10, 2022.

  1. Kjs2015

    Kjs2015 Fapstronaut

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    I’m over 100 days of nofap and I’m already seeing major improvements. I remember that before doing nofap, it was easy to have a conversation with a close friend but when it came to talking to strangers or even GIRLS, it was very difficult. Then after starting nofap I remember within the 50-90 day mark I noticed slight improvements in my flirting with girls and talking to strangers, but I was still paranoid about not being able to have an actual conversation with a girl. Now ever since the start of this week at 100-something days, my conversation problem with girls is ALMOST gone. I’m not getting angry at them anymore, and I understand that girls are more sensitive, and us as guys, are supposed to not let their shit bother us. It’s a breeze! I still get nervous and sometimes I fall flat but it’s definitely better. Even though I’m now getting more female attraction, I feel like I’m still lacking in some areas such as touching and trying to flirt with them sexually. (For example a girl bends over in front of me ON PURPOSE and I can’t bring myself to say or do anything about it.) Will this get better for me on nofap? I already notice that the longer I go on nofap the more improvements I see so will this fear diminish? Thanks
     
  2. MementoMori22

    MementoMori22 Fapstronaut

    I'd say it sounds like your brain is settling into its natural rhythm after the 90-day reboot mark. This explains your more even disposition when interacting with people in general and women specifically.

    In terms of "game", it's a skillset. You won't just magically have the perfect thing to do or say in any given situation. It's something you learn and develop over time through practice. You'll need to do some trial and error to build up that skill. Try touching in small ways (arm, shoulder) when you feel like it. If there's no objection and specifically if she is receptive, try escalating to more and more intimate touching (lower back, hair, legs) over an interaction. If you go a bit too far she will let you know, and unless you jumped way too far ahead too quickly, it will likely be fine. She's generally not going to completely flip out on you.

    Girl bending over deliberately in front of you? If you feel like it's a signal, take it as that. She wants you to escalate the interaction.
     
  3. Kjs2015

    Kjs2015 Fapstronaut

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    I wouldn’t so much say that I said my ‘game is getting better’ but I believe I always had game and porn made me go bad in that area. As far as the touching thing, I still bring myself to doing touching and I’ve done it several times and I feel very uncomfortable doing it. Again, I hope this is something that I’ll get over and stop being scared of in my journey. I mean I’ve had those other things I thought I’d never be able to do again like having a conversation with a girl but now I can
     

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