Please help me

**HAS WORDS THAT COULD BE CONSIDERED AS TRIGGERS, DO NOT READ IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU COULD BE TRIGGERED**




Good afternoon everyone…

A month ago, I experienced an incident where I lost my erec**** with my wife.. this was due to so many factors.
1- I remember that before it happened for a good one month I was watching a lot of femdom porn on twitter.
2- I didn’t feel enough in the relationship, and was very insecure

It caused me to overthink and caused severe performance anxiety, I realized that I have been ONLY watching femdom humiliation, extreme cuckold humiliation porn for about 7 years. I feel like this affected my perception of sex and intimacy and also realized that I only crave humiliation scenarios when it comes to sex. I’m okay with being submissive in bed, but not to the extent of being extremely humiliated or cuckolded.

my sexual life with my wife recently has been good as I explained some of my fantasies and I’m okay with them and she’s okay with them.

I’ve also managed to not watch porn for 14 days now and this is the longest I’ve been without it. I’ve been feeling depressed, anxious, not knowing what I like when it comes to sex, extra sensitive, im overthinking my relationship and my life, and I don’t know if what I’m going through is because I quit porn or because of other things. I feel like because I’ve only watched cuckold porn and femdom porn, it’s the only thing I know now.
Any opinions and advice would be great

 

I really appreciate your reply. I’ve stopped watching all kinds of porn for the past two weeks. Sexually, I’ve realized that I can only have sex and get a full erection after having my wife’s foot in my mouth and her instructing me to start getting myself hard. I’m completely okay with this honestly but I’d love to discover new ways of approaching sex I just don’t know how. Thanks for letting me know that the depression/anxiety is a side effect

 

Thanks man.. did you experience anything similar?

 

Does anyone know long is the flatline? It’s my first time quitting porn

 

I wish you all the best man… and hopefully you can overcome this and everyone that is struggling can overcome this. You seem persistent, and I believe that persistence is key. I feel like once you know that porn is negatively impacting you, then it makes it easier than what it is.

 

I think the hardest part of it all is that when you watch an extreme genre of porn, and it’s all you’ve been watching you forget how it’s like to just be natural and get turned on naturally without or when to get turned on naturally or when it’s appropriate to think sexually and when it’s not

 

I appreciate the motivation brother.. I agree on that porn really really distorts reality. My biggest issue I guess is when my wife says she isn’t horny, which is really normal but because of porn and because of the high number of one night stands I had before getting into a relationship with her, it’s like a shock to my system and it’s demotivating. Todayis my day 15 of no porn. I keep havingintense dreams of cheating, and theyreally get to my head. I’m very sensitive to anything my wife says, and I have nomotivation to go out, no motivation todo anything really but lay down. Sometimes I feel like I’m overwhelmed,but I know porn isn’t the solution to my problems. Im trying to fight it. Theworst part of it all is that I’vecompletely lost my confidence sexually, I don’t know when to initiate or whether I’d maintain an erection, I stress oversex and I see it as something negative and I don’t know how to fix that. Any opinions on whether this is something NoFappers go through?

 

Got it. Thank you! Did you ever feel distance from your wife while you’re rebooting? For me I can’t help but pick on every little thing she does, I don’t have the same craving for her I did 2 months ago. We got married less than a year ago. Is this normal?

 

You’re absolutely right about my mind playing games with me.. it’s driving me crazy and I can’t wait till I feel better. 15 days still very very very persistent on not watching porn and I don’t think I’ll ever watch it again.

 

*Trigger words*


It’s my day 16 without porn, I’m starting to feel a bit better. A couple of weird things I’ve been experiencing which I would love to talk to you guys about.

1- I’ve been experiencing disturbing HOCD dreams.

2- I’ve been experiencing dreams about having trouble in bed with my wife

3- I’ve been remembering a lot of the porn I used to watch when I was a kid rather than the most recent ones

4- I have a mix of no attraction to my wife, performance anxiety, and HOCD. It’s almost like I’m demotivated to try anything and I’m blaming it on everything else.

An important thing to note is that I never experienced this problem up until that one incident where I lost my erection and I just spiraled after it. To be honest I enjoy getting humiliated and made to worship feet or do the most humiliating things rather than having sex, and now I’m trying to just enjoy sex without the idea of being humiliated or cucked.