The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Day 298

 

Checking in day 198.

 

Day 150

My journey so far has been unexpectedly hard, but with a joyful heart I’ve reached Henneth Annûn and been granted the title of King!

Tonight was lovely; visited my friend for her birthday and her husband recently bought a pizza oven! Needless to say I ate far too much, but enjoyed a great night of wine and conversation.

I have a busy week ahead, but I’m looking forward to my holiday after work it’s completed. I’m sure urges will continue to reveal themselves, but I feel stronger and more capable to deal with them now. I thank you all for your help, support, and prayer throughout this year - knowing that I’m not fighting this battle alone is a greater aid than you could know.

 

Check in day 245

 

Day 4 complete!

Sorry for missing a couple check-ins, I've been traveling this weekend to visit a friend in another state. Travel was good for avoiding urges and resets, though! I also haven't been doing my cold showers for the last two days, but that's because I'm fighting a sickness. Adding a cold shower on top of the chills would be too much, I think, and the steam from the hot water helps loosen up my chest. Once I'm feeling better I'll get right back to doing those.

St. Damien of Molokai, pray for us!

 

Day 470

 

Checking in. Normal day, no hard tempations but a mindless moment of laziness in which my mind wondered.

 

Day 22
After engaging nofap way , My brain feels so better.

 

Day 50 complete

Going to sleep in time is going well. I need to accumulate enough sleep energy and I bet I will feel great and be very productive. No major urges, working from home with my wife. Not looking at arousing content since the first day I got sick.

And after 40 minutes I will officialy become a Dwarf

 

Day 1 - Orc, The Dark Tower Barad-Dûr

The night went by with small urges. But nothing to big, going to relax big time after work today.

 

Two Days! Beginning of Day 3.
Last Day of May. For the new month I'll reset all counters (save them for later)

Have a great day evrybody!

Done Routines (so far):
*1min Hand-Stand
*5min Meditation
*2min Gratitude

 

Day 3

Gosh I am beat...

Getting through work was hard today. Everything is broken there which doesn't help. I felt very short on patience most of the day. Next week I'm done and I still think ultimately I made the right decision to leave, although I need to pull through financially. I think I can do it.

I feel weirdly naked in the world like everyone can see through me and knows how screwed up I am. Like they all know I have such low confidence, am a pervert etc. I feel this most of all there and the truth is a lot of people at work do know it. I used to be a popular guy at most jobs I worked, but not this one. There is a certain group of people that seem to like me (I know some of them were fake) and a lot that I can tell don't, especially the girls. I've declined a lot and I got this weird creepy energy now I have to get rid of. A lot of them seem to think I'm hot, but they get turned off fast.

Normally I would PMO about now and I do have urges, like somethings missing. Just gotta pull through. Today I think I accepted on a new level that my brain is screwed up and PMO is a part of that and so it has to go and I need to remember that it has to go. It isn't optional if I am to reverse this.

 

Day 463 no PMO. Spent most of the day relaxing with my family.

 

Dawn of the 74th day.

 

The man has fallen to the shadows. It can happen within a heartbeat. I saw it coming from the second I started my day - my goal for the next try is to prevent it the second I get that lingering feeling.

Day 0

 

Day 5!
Middle urges yestarday, but managed them. Worked out and keeping eating healthy. I continue to use a diary, not for PMO specifically but for all topics of my life. Helps me to matain me focus, I feel like I'm taking me out a lot of heavy dumbells from my arms.

Keep strong my brothers.

 

Day 1. Yesterday was a day full of urges, I think it was because I was feeling a little bit tired because I barely slept of course by the relapse , but anyway today I'm feeling better , I slept well and my mind its not foggy like yesterday. God bless you all.

 

I was really close but I’ve failed.

Relapsed today. Did it one time and felt nothing except the emptiness.

Tomorrow my life will change and I’ll start a new chapter in my life. I wish that I could have entered it as a champion, but I’m still happy about it.

 

Day 12 - Uruk