The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Dawn of the 77th day.

 

182

 

Day 8!
Middle urges yestarday, managed them focusing in the work tasks. Forgot to make a diary entry yestarday but I will do it today. Worked out today and trying to eat healthy.

Keep strong my brothers!

 

Check in day 249

 

Day 4. I already managed to overcome and urge and big temptation, like I said yesterday I need to keep myself focused because the triggers can come in any time. I think I'm just going to do some work and then my workout rutine and try to clean my mind. everyday there is a different battle to overcome. God bless you all

 

Checking in on day 10 after a VERY powerful urge this morning that brought me up to the edge. Fought it down and hoping this current reset cycles through and that the really strong urges die down soon. I hate these initial couple of weeks of a reset.

 

Checking in day 202.

 

Day 9 as an Uruk-Hai, complete!

 

Day 3 check in.

 

Day 154

A busy day, but one in which I’ve learned a lot. Got a lot of thinking to do about the direction of my personal growth and learning, I’m glad I have a few weeks holiday coming up so I can spend some time reflecting.

No urges, all going smoothly today.

 

The doctor put me on a DHT blocker for now, so we'll see what happens.

I have noted that a lot of nofap dudes seem to be bald or clearly going bald... There might be something to it, who knows. So far I'm holding up strong and starting a new streak I plan to make the longest yet so we'll see if it helps.

 

Day 474

 

Day 8 complete! I paint myself with the White Hand and join the ranks of the Uruk-Hai.

Had an urge this morning brought about by a natural cycle of arousal, and for a moment it made me really depressed, thinking about how hard each of these battles is and how there's no end in sight to the battles. You really can't take a moment's rest from NoFap. However...seeing myself at the bottom like that, only a week in and already feeling like I was out of strength prompted me to cry out from my soul to the Lord, that He might save me. When I am nothing, Jesus is everything. With confidence I lift my prayer to Him, knowing that He will hear my cry, because He is never far away.

St. Louis Martin, pray for us!

 

Day 26
Feeling happy today. My mind is so clear

 

Day 301 & 302

 

Excelent day today!
But not so much yesterday... I gave in to some kind of psub. I was mindlessly scrolling through Instagram and started to go from one profile to another, searching for some interesting pictures. Nothing excplicit, but the intentions of my heart were dirty. I decided to leave instagram for a while, I've already done that before and it was damn good.
For today's report just that classic morning that sometimes makes you want it all right after you awake, and other mild urges throughout the day, totally manageable.

 

Day 54 complete

I am suddenly feeling good this morning. I slept great, chouched very few times, though I went to bed later than I want to usualy and woke up later. Doing good with urges.

 

Day 7

A week in...

I got to the chapter in "The Brain That Changes Itself" I mainly wanted to get to and it made me think. I had a very emotionally walled off and unavailable mother with borderline personality disorder and I tend to most lust after women that kinda fit this description and most respond to situations similar to what my dynamic with my mom would have been like. The more disposable they treat me the better, even though I hate the feeling. I was already aware of this, but it hit me in a new way I think.

I started taking these new pills today and I should try to take them around the same time daily, plus I let my sleeping pattern go again so if I take them in the morning that's a good excuse to fix it. I got these DHT blockers which should help with this problem of my hair falling out, but a lot of people do claim to get bad side effects so I'm keeping an eye. I've heard they aren't as common or as bad as people on the internet make it out to be though.

 

Day 467 no PMO. Good day yesterday hanging out with good friends. Today my family and I leave on a trip. Should be a great time. Checking in might be difficult for the next 8 days but I’ll do my best. Stay strong everyone!