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Relationship problems, lack of sex and sissy fetish

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by iwanttobealpha99, Jun 28, 2022.

  1. iwanttobealpha99

    iwanttobealpha99 New Fapstronaut

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    Hi, let me start by describing myself a bit. I am 23 years old, since I can remember I was attracted to dressing women's clothes, but this fetish did not bother me too much. For 5 years I have been in a relationship with a girl who tolerates seeing me sometimes in women's underwear etc.

    The problem is that we don't have classic sex at all. Often some handjob or blowjob, but we never had classic sex. My girlfriend argues that she is afraid of getting pregnant. She comes from a difficult family so I understand her concerns a little. However, I'm a responsible guy and she knows it and yet I don't want to convince myself of sex. I will add that she is also 23 years old.

    In the beginning, that was enough for me. However, over time, when I could not find satisfaction in my girlfriend, I escaped into the world of pornography. From femdom and it ended with sissy. I got into it a lot. I started dressing in women's clothes, set up my ig account as a sissy. I flirted with other guys, sent them my photos, etc. I did all this in hiding from my girlfriend.

    I want to put an end to it once and for all, lately I have longer and longer periods that I can do without sissy fetish. However, I keep coming back to it. I consider myself straight all the time and more and more want to have sex with my girlfriend but she still doesn't want to. I believe that if I started practicing classic sex, it would definitely take me away from sisa fetish and all that shit.

    I don't know what to do, overall I'm a good-looking guy who has never had a problem with women. I am asking for advice on what to do with this situation.
     
  2. Beekind

    Beekind Fapstronaut

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    My honest advice: you need to become a real man and she will beg you to f#ck her.
    But from what i read, you are lost and confused.
    Semen retention and spiritual digging will give you some clarity.
     
  3. Telling someone to become “a real man” isn’t really helpful or constructive feedback in my opinion.

    I think based on what you said you can heal with some open conversation about your addiction, about your sexual frustrations and about your needs. It is time to have that scary and difficult talk that you guys have been avoiding. You’ve been together a long while now so hopefully you can take that next step and resolve the unsaid skeletons in the closet. Either way the course you are on is unsustainable and something is going to eventually give. Your relationship, your addiction and fetish isn’t fulfilling you at the moment or improving your life. You must address this first.
    After you can listen to her reasons cause trust me “I don’t wanna get pregnant so no sex” is a giant load of bullshit. It’s called condoms or birth control. There’s stuff she isn’t saying to you just like there is stuff your hiding from her.

    I encourage you to be brave no matter the outcome because you will finally be moving toward less secrecy and bringing your problems into the light.
     
    Beekind likes this.
  4. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    You can call it bull shi+ but she may actually be terrified to get pregnant. I got pregnant on the pill. All contraceptives have a failure rate even if it is tiny. So just because you trust it, you’re not the one getting pregnant. The pill worked for me for 9 years, lol, but at 32 I got pregnant and no I didn’t forget to take my pill. I did not want kids!
     
  5. If that’s all you got out of that response you kinda missed the point. But sure thing I never denied the potential of getting pregnant.
     
  6. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    You said it was “ bull” for her not wanting sex. She’s only 23! You obviously have never had to worry about getting pregnant. It is a legitimate reason to not want to have sex. Period. And the safest for her. No way I would have sex before I was married and even the I was terrified I’d get pregnant., She gives him hand jobs and blow jobs, but yeah it’s bull that she’s afraid to get pregnant. I do agree he needs to address his addiction, and absolutely dump the girlfriend if all he cares about is getting “ real” sex from her to meet his needs.
     
    NamaClature14 likes this.
  7. Long Range

    Long Range Fapstronaut

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    I knew a girl who was super paranoid about getting pregnant, but with the proper convincing and condom use she would still have sex. Its possible that the OP just doesn't have the skills to seduce her, which is strange after 5 years of dating from ages 18 - 23. The PMO probably doesn't help the situation.

    IwanttobeAlpha99, you really do need to kick your fetish permanently. Trust me, 99% of women do not want their man to wearing women's undies.
     
    Last edited: Jun 30, 2022
  8. Beekind

    Beekind Fapstronaut

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    I stand by my words. A real man is a man who is proud of his masculinity and confident enough to make women crave him and seek his approval.
    Other men get excuses, real men get results.
     
    mrpractical likes this.
  9. mrpractical

    mrpractical Fapstronaut

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    He is a man. A man who can resist his urges and desire is a man. Dont demotivate him.
     
  10. mrpractical

    mrpractical Fapstronaut

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    Great! Talk to her. Maybe you can convince her. At least you get blowjobs.
     
  11. iwanttobealpha99

    iwanttobealpha99 New Fapstronaut

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    What advice do you have for me to become a real man?
     
    Beekind likes this.
  12. iwanttobealpha99

    iwanttobealpha99 New Fapstronaut

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    I know.
    I don't know what I'm doing wrong that she doesn't want to have sex with me.

    My sissy fetish makes me a little bit turned on by the fact that I can't get real sex.
     
  13. Beekind

    Beekind Fapstronaut

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    Be clear on what you want.
    Do SR for a year.
    Go lift weights.
    Interrupt your inner dialogue.
    If after all of that you still have sissy fantasies, forget about the whole thing and do what the hell you desire( without guilt)
     
    Last edited: Jun 30, 2022
    NamaClature14 likes this.
  14. See that advice is what I’m saying. You gotta give steps, provide insight for folk is all. Just assuming people know how to be a real man is pretty limiting ya know? So you can be machismo & boost your muscle mass or testosterone levels sure; but also still be a pretty toxic and pathetic man. I knew 1000 of those dudes playing college ball. On the flip side the most loved and successful people I ever met attracted it all just because they have incredible character. The way they treat others and themselves makes them a force of nature in whatever they set their mind too.

    For sure on the interrupting your inner dialogue -that’s such a crucial skill that so few people practice.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 30, 2022
    Beekind likes this.

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