Need to make some changes

Im a family man in mid 30s with wife and two kids and been fapping ever since middle school. Never been a issue till I’m getting older and have family. While in teenagers and college I can fap like crazy and workout swimming jogging as routine and still being healthy. Now can’t since family take much of my time and sacrifice workout or cardio activities.

I’ve never thought that I was addicting to porn as this behave and habit is with me from teenagers and not affecting my life much I still doing good at school met girls playing sports and passionate in learning new thing. But since pandemic and start wfh all of sudden sometime when it’s still daytime at my room and not much work on company side I just took my personal laptop out and start watch porn and fap and things getting worse as I spent more time on different varieties or porn and keep stimulating myself and so on so for. I lose interest with my wife no doubt and also lose energy with kids and very often after fapping will catch cold or flu. Also Im person easily get tonsillitis and that just make things worsen.

I really want to make changes since this is affecting my life now and my wife had caught me numerous time fapping instead of having intimacy time with her and also no energy spend with kids. I do some research and reading them found out there is really porn addicting just like ppl addicting to drugs. After digging deeper I found out I am deeply addicted to porn and need to change now. In past I do sometimes make mind and stop fap like a week or two mostly when I’m sick or ill.. probably that doesn’t count and even if there is a period of time like a week or two NoFap no porn my mindset is say let’s fap after these two weeks and fap harder as a reward… and the vicious cycle going to loop again a and again.

this time i really want to make things different. I seek out forum like this and read more studies and hopefully I can regain my life and a healthy mindset and body back.