The Lord of the Rings Challenge

We are with you bro.
Don't worry ! ZYZZ is watching us bro!

 

Day 75
Today is a normal, lazy day.
Good luck!

 

Been gone, busy with life... wait, the streaks have changed?
Dope! Right, about the rest, checking in Day 70 - that means I'm a warrior.

Also I've never been consistent with these, so hum right. here's my checking in after weeks lol. Still doing good!

Can't believe I'm this far, seriously.

 

day 4

With sleep pills, I got some longer-than-usual sleep, which is much needed for night shift.

I'm finding that checking in here daily helps heighten my awareness of NoFap pursuit on a daily basis. The "comrade" / fellowship vibe on this thread is definitely a big plus.

 

Welcome back bro ! Perfect timing !

 

Checking in day 241.

 

Had a great day today,

Most of the day spent working but also didn't forget about exercising.
Spent a few hours outside. Took a cold shower.

I need to stop overthinking about my job interviews.

 

checkin out!

Day feeling: kinda stressed kinda good

morning routine:
early stand up (6am):
work:
No PMO:
work-out/cardio:
No Series/Games before 6pm(till 9pm):
Journaling:

Greets!

 

Day 2 / 1000.

It was raining almost all day. A lot. That's ok. We are used here to northern summers. Record beating heat waves that happen in recent years make me quite uncomfortable. So, resting from heat now in some sense.

The end of catholic festival, where I now live. Chapels were still open. So, despite the rain, went to see what's inside. I always stay longest near the copy of The Shroud of Turin. Brings lots of thoughts.

Spoiler: Journey stuff

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Stuff that should help to not pmo:
1. No internet for recreational purposes until 6 pm.
2. Waking up on the same time every day.

 

Day 1 completed!

Thank you for the positive words on my last post. Today I had an insane session at the gym and listed the apartment out for sale. Amazing feedback!! So many people interested.

Good tuesday!

 

Checking in. Some urges, especially right when I wake up and right before bed. Overall a good day.

 

Day 0

Unfortunately I MOd this morning. Woke up with severe anxiety, and MO seemed like a way out.

Had severe anxiety all day today. Think a lot of it has to do with ideological confusion and realising I probably don’t believe a lot of the things that I was brought up to believe. Which is a heartbreaking but important realisation.

I think the big problem with my life is that I always feel like somebody else has got their claws on me, trying to manipulate me and bend me to their will, wanting to form me in their image. It’s a painful realisation when you realise that people you trusted had been using your innocent childlike trust to indoctrinate you and make you in their image. But at the same time it’s liberating, as it opens up the possibility to be made in God’s image, the man I’m supposed to become. It’s part fate and part free will. I wonder who I will become. But strangely, when I put my power in God rather than people, I don’t feel so worried about the future, and it doesn’t bother me as much that I don’t know the future.

Been dealing with lots of intrusive thoughts and inner turmoil. But I’m just going to keep plodding on, one day at a time, living by my conscience and being honest with myself and others, and holding on to that small flicker of hope in my heart.

“We held on to hope of better days coming, and when we did, we were right.” - From You Were Cool by The Mountain Goats, one of my favourite bands ever. I love those guys.

 

Day 193

Muggy heat here today, it’s made me feel lethargic and unmotivated. Despite this I actually really enjoyed the day; got a good amount of work done, enjoyed some games with my friends, went out for drinks after - highlight of the day was buying a fan to help me cool down at night!

Had to diffuse a situation; I went to the cinema with three friends yesterday and after some gossip started I had to tell my friend that it wasn’t as a double date but just as friends. I don’t blame her for wanting clarity, there’s a lot of relationship gossip going round at the moment, but it does jar me that people think two single people on a night automatically means they’re dating. All is well though, and the anxiety it caused didn’t lead to urges.

 

Good Day!
Some urges are still lurking around. I didn't sleep well, so I was tired throughout the whole day.
But still, it was a good day.
Gonna sleep soon so I can be fine tomorrow!

 

I'm unable to channel excessive testosterone, couple that with absence of empathy and capacity to feel, it can take you to dangerous places. I particularly sense hostility from other men when I'm outdoors. I also have cruel nature.... and other personality disorder, Anti-social being one.

 

5 days - With rain and fog you enter the old village of Bree.

Having some urges.

Congratulatuons @til_im_free and @Neu for reaching awesome benchmarks

@Redemptionisrequired welcome back

 

Day 340 & 341

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