4 years no PMO - Tips that helped me

You understand dopamine isn’t bad? It’s excessive dopamine that addicts chase. Dopamine from sex with a long term partners is far less than with porn or a brand new partner. Trust me, after 35 years the dopamine I get from my husband is very, very small, lol. We’re I to find a new partner iI would get much more dopamine in the beginning but it would taper off.

 

The problem I see with this line of reasoning is that this puts extremely unrealistic standards on an individual. It's a form of all-or-nothing thinking that only causes pressure, resentment and perfectionism.

By living to such simplistic rigid rules, you will never be able to relax, because the obsession with 'hard mode' streaks is a game that you're bound to lose. Besides, it makes us victims. Whenever an O occurs [even without P], we will feel bad, not because of the O [by my knowledge a natural occurence], but because of the underlying perfectionist black-and-white thinking patterns [most people don't realize that our mood disturbances are actually triggered by our thoughts, not events]. And then it becomes a self-fulfillng prohecy... you feel like shit after an O, so the depression must be brought on by the O in some natural way, like the moon causing the tides.

 

Whatever. Psychobabble. Either you do a hard mode reboot or you don't.

 

Zero dopamine is a better way.

 

You cannot break an addiction.

 

You would die. Dopamine makes you seek out food. It’s the seeking drug. It makes you want sex to procreate so humans don’t die. A steak give you dopamine, a pretty sunset. You cannot eliminate dopamine entirely.

 

If someone can stop an addiction by willpower, they weren't addicted.

 

Dude. Dopamine does not take your hunger or motivation away. Quite the opposite.

 

You literally cannot survive without dopamine. That is a fact. It is produced within your body for many good functions. Understand it’s function. It helps your memory, it motivates, it helps with learning. There is such a thing as dopamine deficiency.

 

Yes, I know, but he seems to have a misunderstanding of dopamine and thinks zero is better. He doesn’t understand that addicts use pmo to produce excessive amounts of dopamine and that’s part of the issue. Dopamine itself is needed, but in normal quantities that music, food, a beautiful sunset provide.

 

Thank you for your very good post, it is very helpful to me. I will keep returning to it for inspiration. Thanks

 

This is my understanding as well, it is not the dopamine that is the problem it is the way we use it, watching porn to create an excessive amount which floods the brain and gives us the super high we get, works the same as cocaine which also floods the brain with excessive amounts

 

Thanks, this is a solid post and great tips.

 

can i ask you a few personal questions?

1. how long have you been in a relationship?
2. how would you describe your sex life?
3. is there anything that still triggers you to watch p?

thanks for coming round
wish you all the best

 

Thank you for taking the time to write out this list. I found it very helpful!

 

Great post on praying ask everynoght give me 1 more day