Casual viewing not even to jerk off

Why are you watching Porn

 

You should start thinking about it so that you can defeat the battles that cause you to look at porn.

If it's on your phone, why don't you download kindle and get Your Brain on Porn and other good books on the topic. And choose to open and read it any time you get an urge. Sooner or later you will start to associate your phone with the book.

 

The reason he watches porn is because he is a porn addict. It’s quite possible he may be a sex addict as well.

 

I am really confused by your responses. First you described how you can’t stop looking at it, and you said you’re considering porn blockers because you cannot stop on your own. Then you stated that don’t even think about it. Not even thinking about it means that you are in recovery and you have stopped looking at it.

It’s seems quite clear that you have not recovered. You seem to be contradicting yourself.



How is that possible for you to change your mind in the same day?

 

I imagine he may intend it's a reflexive action, that he does it without thinking about it, but he wants to stop.

Seriously though, SelfMastoryGoal, if it's something you just do without thinking about, at best it's a habit, from you description it's addiction. The book Your Brain on Porn is a really good start. It's also on Audible if you'd rather listen to it, that's how I listened to it. When you feel the urge, get some headphones, listen to book and go for a walk, or do something physical that's different.

Here's a question that may feel a little intense (partially to match the intensity you've possibly been putting your brain through), what emotional pain are you using porn to medicate yourself from feeling?

The King and Maker of the Universe created you at your birth in his image.

 

Stop all together

 

Take off the headset on your head.

 

it's hard to talk and explain what's going on, eh? I think that's even more reason to try to do so though. It gets easier to explain with time because we understand ourselves better, and also have more words. Keep trying and keep fighting mate.

 

Not masturbating but still seeing PORN is not good. Porn is the entry door for lust. Porn is what generates the dopamine that your body and mind are addicted to, and masturbation is just the consequence of it. Dude, stop looking at porn ASAP. It does not matter if you don't masturbate and still see porn, because you are flooding your body with dopamine, making yourself useless because you have 0 motivation for anything, therefore, you are making your life harder.

Porn blockers don't work if you are willing to find workarounds. So if you install it, stick to it.

I use CleanBrowsingDNS (free version) on my phone and computer. It works and it forces your search engines to be in safe mode, it also blocks sites like reddit and such...
Good luck!

 

I'm the same way. I don't even get excited looking at P been that way for a long time. I just browse while I do something else maybeye I MO if I find something maybeye I wont

 

That's the addiction, you don't even get excited anymore. but if you look for that extremely new shit, I'm sure you will get excited.
See, that's the issue with porn, normal doses don't work anymore, you neeed more and more.

 

I'm taking this seriously as I still have some morals as there is content I will just not watch. If I can undue the desensitization then I can have a real sex life. Seems like the brain can't distinguish real sex from PMO

 

These are the relevant parts of the conversation. These are the things you need to think about.
I do a thing. Why? Especially if I think it harms me, why?
Maybe it doesn't harm you. Maybe it does. Either way, even if you want to stop, you can't. Or at least, it's difficult.
You have been drifting in the stream, pushed by external forces, reacting, if moving at all. Now you want to go somewhere else. You can't. You don't know how. You won't learn how and enact how unless you know why. Why are you in the place you are, and is it truly worth the effort to move?

Yes. Good. How does it let go of stress? Does it let go of stress? Or does it distract you from stress, until you aren't paying attention to the stress, and then you only think the stress goes away? But it doesn't. The thing causing the stress,

Does that go away because you looked at a woman, attractive, unadorned, inviting? No? Because she isn't real. It distracts because in one moment your brain says "she accepts me, a beautiful woman shares herself with me so things are working out, I am good enough." But the other moment, your mind, it tells you. No. She isn't real. You are rejected, and why not? What about you is acceptable? What reason do you have for confidence? Things are not working out, and they won't work out in the future. You are not good enough. It weighs on your mind, it drags you down, it digs into your flesh like a handcuff, and your mind, the cop, the prison guard, twists it even further. So you distract yourself. You look for a woman, attractive and unadorned, different this time, to lie and say you are good enough. And so the cycle goes, a war between truths, one you believe only as long as you indulge but most of the time you know where reality lies.
You cannot simply not distract. The problem persists, and now you have nothing. No respite. Now every single moment, you are reminded. Not. Good. Enough. It never stops. A person becomes willing to do anything to make it stop. Anything. Except the obvious answer.

Sounds so easy. Stop looking at porn. Stop being a loser. Might as well say end pollution. Cure cancer. The problem is complex, there are multiple steps. Might as well say cook a hamburger, it is too difficult unless you understand the steps, unless you know how.

I'm sorry, I can't tell you. I don't know how.

It isn't true, what I just said. I don't know the specifics. I don't know what is wrong, what makes you a loser. I don't know what you think is a winner, less how to guide you toward it. I would need to sit with you, learn about you, know you. Do you want that? Do I? Maybe. Probably not. What I can say is, you already know. Not how to complete it, but how to begin, and how to find out. But it starts with not running. Not escaping. It starts with confronting the accusation, by looking it in the eye. By merging the parts of your mind that want different things, instead of making them contradict one another. It begins with saying "Yes, I am a loser. I fear rejection. I fear things not working out. I am not good enough." But it does not end there. It can not. It moves forward, to "How do I become good enough? How do I make things work out? How do I become brave against rejection?" It moves to thinking about the problem, and building a strategy to overcome the problem, and working the strategy, and adjusting the strategy when it doesn't work and trying again. And then, when your mind says "You are a loser. You are not good enough," you can answer "Yes. But I am doing what I can to not lose, to become good enough, and that in itself is good enough. It is good enough for now."

This is life. Not a fairy tale. Not a movie. There is no godmother who will give you a dress and a set of magic slippers, or a genie to give you wealth and fame for rubbing. You tried that. There is no training montage to "Eye of the Tiger," you do not get to skip the work, or the suffering.
It's better than that. You will not have to credit a godmother or a genie, external forces. You will be something more than the stick who drifted on the stream. You will go somewhere else, somewhere different from the others, somewhere new, and it will be because you brought yourself there. You will value what you become because of the suffering you endured. You will make yourself into something magnificent, something good enough for yourself, and you will find that that thing is not good enough for someone else but that will be okay, because you will find others who agree, and they will accept you.

And you will no longer need a woman, attractive and unadorned, to lie. Whether or not there is a woman to say it, the truth will be that you are good enough.