Does the desire to watch porn decrease over time?

Yes, the desire to watch porn fades over time. If you've never had sex, once you have sex you realize that porn is just a crutch and sex is what you're craving.

 

My opinion… the problem is that you want to “switch from porn to real girls”. So you are still craving sex, but just the real thing instead of artificial stimulation from videos.

I’d say you need to switch to a zero sex at all mindset. Even girls don’t want a guy who wants sex… they want a guy who doesn’t even bring up the word sex. Saying sex to a girl is like cussing at them

So you can either not think about sex at all, and a girl will let you know she wants to have sex when she does.

Or, you can continue thinking about sex but just pretend you aren’t thinking about it when you are around a girl. Either way you have to keep your mouth shut about it, so might as well just not thinking about it at all.

The more we think about sex, the overall more net suffering we will experience. Each second we think about sex and are not having it, that is a second of suffering. So might as well diminish the amount of suffering as much as possible

 

I see where OP is going, but yeah, it seems like a mistake in mindset.
dont see "girls" as a substitute for PMO - that is still in the trap of reducing them to objects and stimuli and dopamine - which is what drives this addiction. In a worst case scenario with that, you could end up just hiring sex workers and being an addict that way.

it's about changing up the whole dynamic. Getting in touch with the emotional, personal, intellectual bond of another human being. sex is only one piece of the giant jigsaw puzzle of intimacy. Growing up in the digital dopamine-hit age, I think it can be hard to see / feel that.

Id say give your libido a break. P addiction does fade, but you have to stop feeding it first. focus on hobbies, eating healthy, exercise, reading, nature, music, etc etc.. focus on being the best version of yourself, and the dating will come naturally later.

 

How can I do any of those activities when my attention span is low, brain fog is so thick, and I'm numb to emotions? Not saying you're wrong, but I feel like it's almost impossible for me in this state of mind.

 

Wow, that is not true in my experience. There is a lot of girls/women that are into sex and also want to have sex pretty early on. But I get what you probably mean, don't approach a girl and start talking about sex. But say in a club environment I have met plenty of girls that found the attraction, talked a bit and then directly on to sexual stuff later on. The "issue" is that if you crave sex a lot and it shows, girls will find you a loser and not approach or go home with you. Once they are on board and they have showed that they are into you they are as much into sex-talk as anyone else.

 

For sure, yea I meant like not talking about sex right away, and to show you like the girl not just because of sex, I guess that’s what I meant.

But yea, in a club environment or places that serve alcohol, sex can probably be talked about much soon

 

Yes it does but it stayed in my memory, its a demon, you cant kill it, but u can stop feeding it. It gets smaller. But its still there, waiting for your weak moment.

 

Yes. But do not rely on that. After a long streak porn does not tempt much on a normal day, but there are still days when the temptation can flare up, so we need to be ready for those days too.

 

yeah thats real. not saying you can do all of them right away...sometimes it's just baby steps at Day 0 or Day 1. Start with going outside. go for a walk. smell the flowers / trees / air - something other than computers.

write down how you feel
log in here to talk to people
maybe cook something for yourself...

start small. start with just going outside

 

I think it varies from person to person. I've been watching pornography since I was 10 and masturbating to it since the age of 15. I'm 26 going on 27, and while I am not proud of the fact that I've been unable to resist these compulsions in the years past, I do not regard myself as a sex addict due to the fact that my longest NoFap streak was 100+ days (sucks to lose that kind of progress). There are good days and there are bad days. I think the urges come on most strongly when you're overcome with fatigue after a bad day at school/uni/work and you figure that PMO will help you to unwind. These are the days that frighten me the most. The amount of time that you spend without PMO has no effect on your desire to indulge, from my experience. The trick is to find ways to subvert that compulsion, and there are countless ways to do it. You simply have to find what works best for you

 

Yes u corectly called a compulsion - for u its when u tired and need to unwind, for me, its when Im frustrated - when I feel Im failing or that things dont go my way.

It that moment, I want to relapse on EVERYTHING. Its scary. And hard.

Its like... nothing matters, not even my life, lets relapse fully and fuxk it

 

These are issues caused by your porn usage I guess.

A club where people use alcohol: a great place to meet toxic, hungry and needy people. These girls are trying to get their fix in the same way as an addict needs porn to get his fix imo.

 

This is absolutely going to vary from person to person, but in my experience (1 year sobriety, 4 years in recovery in SA) no the desire to watch porn doesn't really decrease. You'll have some days that the desire for porn isn't as bad, but that's just that particular day. Others will be so bad it truly feels like a NEED, not just a selfish desire. But I'm really caught up on something you said: You only want to switch from porn to women REALLY scares me because that makes it sound like you have zero interest in losing the addiction, but that you only want to use real women in person to satisfy your addiction, not to enter into a dating or committed relationship. I would say that with extreme probability, this will only end horribly for you and anyone you're with. It will be clear very early on that you're not interested in a relationship of any kind. She will see that you don't care about her wants, needs, dreams, or fears. She will see that you're using her for sex and she'll vanish and you'll be right back here.

My advice is to get into a local 12 step SA program, get a sponsor there, and get into CSAT therapy.

 

It does but be careful. You always have to be on guard, since pmo addiction is real and triggers are all over the web

 

To be honest I don't need that. I can meet girls and take a coffee and this might happen as well, it was just one scenario where it tends to happen more often for ppl in general, after a drink or two. Because people tend to relax more, not always because they are intoxicated. Also calling all people who go to a club and drink or drink in general to be looking for a fix ass porn.. well... you don't get laid much hu? If you see sex as a fix, stay away from it, live the munk life. But not all of us want to stay away from sex, we just don't want to do PMO, MO or watch porn. This absolutism judging everyone that is not "true" and basically following the insel-path is imo bs.

 

Yes. It will fade. What will increase is your desire to socialize and be around women. It's your brain resetting and getting you back to your default. Once you get sexual urges under your control, which takes time and persistence, anxiety will disappear, if any exists to begin with. You will posses a fearless mindset. It won't be forced or uncomfortable. You will just have an easy relaxed mindset in every situation. The changes will be subtle and profound at the same time as you've most likely read in this forum. Masculine traits will begin to really develop and those older fapping passive traits will cease to exist over time.

To underscore some of the changes, I'll highlight some of the ones I've experienced:
1. Deeper grounded voice
2. Eyes will glisten almost like glass (semen retention byproduct)
3. Social anxiety disappears
4. Ability to hold eye contact is easy
5. Women and men will approach you more randomly in public throughout the day
6. Your face will become more masculine and that puffy "wanker face" will go away
7. You'll walk straighter without that fapper hunch
8. Confidence will become second nature. You won't act arrogantly, which I feel is an over compensation by many fappers in society.
9. You will be horny most of the time but learn to control your urges
10. As your body produces more sperm and prostatic fluid you'll have those occasional discharges when you pee. It's normal. This is the normal male default setting

 

Sex without love IS a fix.
And love belongs in a marriage or at least where man and woman decided to commit to each other in long term.

 

Wrong. Sex and love are two separate things that can be combined but sex without love can be a wonderful thing. Also people love each other without sex sometimes. Sex is a primal instinct, love is something else. And yes I am seeing a biblequote coming from you now but please don't

Also if you see sex without love I am also sure you see many things as bad or a "sin" in everyday life. This is a good way to close your mind and to make life smaller. Not the path I would chose or recommend for anyone.