I can't quit....give me advice.

It sounds like you're having a tough time, and feeling pretty frustrated about this whole thing. Sorry about that

Yeah, that is definitely going to make it more difficult for you. Is there anything you can do to help avoid looking at these girls in skimpy clothing?

 

I've been there. Sometimes when there is a lot of sexual stimulation in our daily lives, it makes it a lot harder.

However, I would avoid using things like "I can't". Every time you say or think that way, you've already failed. You definitely CAN do it! Your body doesn't need to have some sort of sexual release, but your addicted brain is telling you that you do. It's totally a mental game. If you're head isn't in it, you loose every time.

 

Urges are a natural part of the process, it's an unfortunate pain you'll just have to live with and deny. Think of it as a beast within you which gets angry within you and starts making you feel bad, or horny, or irritable, or fuzzy headed etc. whenever you do not feed it. This beast is killing you, and you've recognized that, but the only way to kill it is to starve it and every time you do you feel pain. I'm on day 21 and I sometimes feel like I need to puke when I know I don't, or I'll get tired suddenly, or I'll get so horny it's almost like it's taking over me. Rebooting is all about facing your urges and conquering them, growing as a result, and it takes time. I highly recommend hopping on over to youtube and watching videos by the Sacred Sexuality Project which has lots of good advice on quitting and dealing with your urges, including many techniques to do so. I've been using cold showers for almost a week now and it's awesome.

 

Have a good read of this post mate...

http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthread.php?3549-Action!-or-not!!!-Have-you-actually-Prepared-for-it

...and bear in mind that you really might want to take the time to reconsider your approach and working through the steps that book/system recommends will massively increase your chances of long term success. Get in touch if you need help. Cheers

 

Learn about the chaser effect that is beating you up. Also understand that your arousal is gone in less than 10 minutes, UNLESS your arousal continues to be fed every 10 minutes or less. If you continue to think about that short skirt or sexy legs or giant breasts, guess what? You are never going to lose your arousal. Learn how to move your mind away from Betty's boobs and on to anything else.

 

Truer words have never been spoken. Its so easy to think that is a body thing when its really a mind game.

 

The main issue is (as a few have pointed out) is the negativity. Thinking negatively will bring negative things to you. More importantly though, thinking positively will bring positive things to you. Even if focusing on NOT FAPPING, you're still focusing on the negative which you want to remove. Focus on nature, comedy, science, meditation, a fun game, etc. as these things bring you positive energy. I highly recommend watching this movie, The Secret: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltGstp5GaFc It has nothing to do with porn, but you may certainly find it motivating in this life-long change you wish to make.

I wish you luck! Remember to stay positive.

 

You can't keep a bird from flying over your head, but you can keep it from building a nest on your head. Yoga pants are going to happen, but what will you do when it does happen? Keep looking? Look away but look again? Instead, you can choose to deliberately direct your eyes away and keep them away. Consistently do something else in your mind when this happens. For me, immediate silent prayer helped me to see that I had allowed my eyes to focus there in the first place, and helped me to avoid doing that. Don't just kill old habits. Build new ones.

 

same happens to me..

 

a very good advice here, thanks !