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Masturbation destroyed my life

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Hope to revovery, Nov 30, 2015.

  1. Nov 30, 2015 #1
    Hope to revovery

    Hope to revovery New Fapstronaut

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    I am 18 but mu story is very different from others but may be less painful
     
    Hope to revovery, Nov 30, 2015
    Hope to revovery, Nov 30, 2015
    #1
  2. Nov 30, 2015 #2
    Hope to revovery

    Hope to revovery New Fapstronaut

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    My story began when i cant remeber .. All i remember that i masturbate on my first day on earth i can't remember anything in my childhood except masturbation even i can't remember if someone told me about or i learned it by myself...
    I spent 9 years of my life masturbation even i dont know if it is bad or not or if god forbid it or not just mastubation (no porn just what tv show) till my 3rd year in middle school when someone suddenly open atopic on masturbation.. I dont even know what masturbation means ... When he explained it.to me i was shocked bec i spent nearly 9 years on it so i make a decision not to make ot again .. I spent 4 years of my life trying to stop masturbation i succeded 3 times .. The 1sr and longest one is 4 months but unfortunately i discoverd that my father is watching porn ...so when i relapsed i start watching porn in my father pc .which make it me more harder to quit....at this point my life changed .. I was from perfect students in my class after porn i didnt do well in my high school grades so i attend pharmacy school (not medical school as i dreamed my wholelife) now i hope this thread help me .. Belive me guys this story is 10% about my life i dont explain my mental problems which happend in highy school bec of porn and my anxiety from not achiving my dream in medical school. I was telling god bad words and blame him that he didn't help me .... My story is too painful that i was cryong my whole high school to get rid of this piece of shit ....now i still struggling in porn and masturbation eveny mental relapsing.... I almost got crazy in my high school.. But know i am more relaxed than before bec i believe that punoshing myself about what happend will make it worse so i alawys search for solution to stop my hell
     
    Hope to revovery, Nov 30, 2015
    Hope to revovery, Nov 30, 2015
    #2
  3. Nov 30, 2015 #3
    Kyoheix

    Kyoheix Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the site, you took the first step which is seeking for a solution and a better way of life which is no little thing.
    There is a lot of material to read and learn here, the more you know about your problem, your body and how you react to the early stages of PMO, the easier it is to get it out of your system.
    I'll suggest you get started by reading this guide by NoBrainer which is right to the point.
    Get involved in the community and don't be afraid to ask anything you want to know. We are here not to judge you but to help you get through this. Read, learn and when you're ready, stick to a group, make a journal. We want to hear about you and every step you take.
     
    Kyoheix, Nov 30, 2015
    Kyoheix, Nov 30, 2015
    #3
    lethalgunman99 and Hope to revovery like this.
  4. Dec 1, 2015 #4
    Hope to revovery

    Hope to revovery New Fapstronaut

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    thank you for your feedback
     
    Hope to revovery, Dec 1, 2015
    Hope to revovery, Dec 1, 2015
    #4

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