A book that is helping me tremendously nofap or not

Great quote, many thanks!! Also, Napoleon tells this topic in his book: "Think And Get Rich" I don't know if it's the real title, but in Spanish is this one. There is a chapter in which explains how important is to use the sexual energy for develop creativity and build new ideas.

Thanks again.

Kind Regards

 

A must read book!!!!!

 

In the chapter of sex transmutation (Think and Grow Rich) Hill wrote the following: "Sex, alone, is a mighty urge to action, but it's forces are like a cyclone-they are often uncontrollable. When the emotion of love begins to mix itself with the emotion of sex, the result is calmness of purpose, poise, accuracy of judgement and balance."

So I think when you quit fapping and start a relationship where sex and love are balanced, you should be able to collect and use your sexual energy for something great.

 

Thanks ZenPool for recommending Napoleon Hill's "Outwitting the Devil", I just bought the eBook and will read it on my iPad. I couldn't agree more to the following Q & A in the book regarding damages in over-indulgence of sex: "... the greatest damage is that it depletes the source of man's greatest driving force, and wastes, without adequate compensation, man's creative energy. It dissipates energy needed by nature to maintain physical heath. Sex is nature's most useful therapeutic force. It depletes the magnetic energy which is the source of an attractive pleasing personality. It removes the sparkle from one's eyes and sets up discord in the tone of one's voice. It destroys enthusiasm, subdues ambition, and lead inevitably to the habit of drifting on all subjects...".
I am as of today 72 days strong from PMO, and for the first time in my life since I indulged in PMO over an extended period of 48 years, I now feel the energy and productiveness coming back to me.

mformastery
18 Jan 2015

 

Awesome quote dude, once I get through my current pile of books I am definitely intrigued to put it on top of the backlog.

I want to be creative and produce something great. But PMO. Time for change.

 

I think you'll need to read the book (or better listen to the audio on YT) to really get a life changing experience from it. Sex or lust to me was one of the many manifestations that came out of stress, idleness, and unfulfilled purpose/dreams (drifting, fear, misfortune). The quotes are powerful, but you need to read (or listen) to the whole book. Take notes and reflect.

 

This book has been irrevocably life-changing for me!!

After meditating on this book and combining it with other personal development books, I've gained way more insight into the nature of sexual expression, transmutation and the concept of "Devil" as based on the book.

I feel a strong urge to share this to hopefully benefit others instead of just leaving this in my private journal, so here goes - and this is coming from me who has a long history of masturbation and watching porn since 9.

Disclaimer: I only share what works for me, no religious connotations are purposefully conveyed - the words "God" and "Devil" are most natural to me. Take what sounds good to you, ignore what doesn't.

I shall start by saying that – masturbation in itself is neutral, although there are much physical, mental and societal consequences it brings, as per the law of cause and effect.

As per the law of cause and effect:

1. Physical consequences include the draining of organ fluids necessary for a healthy body.
2. Mental consequences include the loss of mental clarity and indefiniteness to seep in – laziness, loss of fight to do other tasks.
3. Societal consequences include the perceived shame and guilt perceived by self and society, for lack of control, giving in to temptation etc.

I believe it is more about the intention that triggered the masturbation instead of the act itself. If it got triggered by fear (concept of "Devil") then it is indeed negative. For example if I use masturbation to escape from negative self talk, then it is a waste of sexual energy in such a "low-level" expression.

If it got triggered by faith (concept of "God") then it can be a powerful and positive force. For example, if I use masturbation to elevate my sexual state (you can feel it in your body) to think/ act on about solving problems in work, school or other duties, then the energy is automatically transmuted through into other areas of life, since you are demanding that you draw more energy from your being to do significant projects in your life.

Masturbation can be harnessed into an extremely powerful force if it is used to mimic real human experiences – to teach the mind and body to live in the state of elevated attractiveness, where every word, touch or gaze is enough to dissipate waves of attractive energy, and powerful enough to elicit sexual tension in others.

Even if elevated sexuality is not your goal, having that magnetism can help you attract friends, business associates to help you achieve your goals, as people want to be around you.

Most people end up receiving the negative consequences of masturbation because they have yet to learn to master their sexual energy, which is akin to diving face in into water without treading shallow waters, with uncontrollable results.

This happens mainly by fantasizing over scenarios without the emotion of faith and belief that it can happen to them, or worse, to watch porn on screens where someone else is screwing the object of their desire – the ultimate beta-male position.

This is particularly confidence-crushing without you realizing it – some other male is literally taunting you by screwing the girl of your dreams, yet instead of getting angry and wanting to replace or at least curse the man, you voluntarily “join-in” and get lustily triggered off the entire scene. Imagine if that woman was your wife and she watched you jerk off while she gets handled by another man, instead of rescuing her…

This sends to yourself the message that “You are not worth that attractive girl. You are only good enough to watch, while someone else takes her.” under secretive, guilt-tripped circumstances which makes it worse.

This was me for so long and finally I now understand why it has been wrecking my confidence with girls personally.

After meditating on the concept of the devil from the book, and pondering over past examples of my life, I am thoroughly convinced that the presence of the devil exists in each and every one of us – it is a law of nature that balances the forces equally, between good and bad - and it rears it's ugly head in one of the strongest motivators for man - the desire for sex (since it is what has the large possible influence on our behaviour).

One of the underrated abilities humans have, which no other living thing has, is our power to choose our thoughts no matter the external or internal circumstances. This has huge significance. What separates us from lower-intellect animals that merely respond to external stimuli and body impulses? What has allowed humans to create organized civilizations despite needing the same exact desires for shelter, food, and water that every other living species needs?

It is our ability to choose for what we stand for.

Our ability to decide if we should give in to that sexual temptation...

Connecting this idea with the equilibrium set by “God” and “Devil” (that also sets natural cycles like the 4 seasons, water cycle etc.), representing the forces of faith and fear, this means that by natural laws, humans will consistently be exposed to choices to make, between the voices of faith and fear – throughout existence. What is mean is the choice to masturbating or not, whether to let unethical lustful thoughts take root in the mind or not, whether to cheat on partners or not.

Coupled with the power of habit (hypnotic rhythm), these thoughts will crystallize into formless patterns and outward behaviors that eventually determine the destiny of the person.

The devil feeds on indecision, the indefiniteness of purpose, sloth, lust and many sins.

The God feeds on faith.

The key is this:

If you don’t choose, or even know that there is this choice to be made, you will default into following the devil since there was NO DEFINITIVENESS OF PURPOSE on your part to make that choice.

This concept of DEFINITIVENESS OF PURPOSE is such a key concept of the book and this post so I suggest you grab it if you do not comprehend what I am talking about...

Those thoughts that spur you on to masturbate when you promised you would stop, that it will be the last time, or you will just watch but not leak…are voices of evil. Voices laden with the emotion of fear that has been conditioned into you from some form of childhood upbringing, or poor decisions made during adolescence.

Perhaps by masturbating away your fluids in a safe space, you could escape those feelings of insecurity and dread. At least this was what it was like more me.

The story differs among people, but the end result is the same: sexual energy is released through lesser means.

People say “it’s hard” – literally and figuratively to “hold in all that energy and not masturbate”, and that’s exactly the source of the problem. Because they are akin to trying to block the flow of a river using rocks. The river – unless channeled into a stream for clean and positive usage – will find it’s way around for any downhill, and when it does it explodes upon impact, often leading to much more guilt and perpetuating the cycle.

For the majority of my life, I’ve made the assumption that sexual tension had to be removed at once – from human’s natural tendency to reduce our tensions to live in the most comfortable state. Turns out, we need to embrace this tension to elevate us to better works, and we start by appreciating that it’s meant to make us uncomfortable.

This is a big fundamental shift. Sexual tension is meant to make us uncomfortable, to make us want to take action and do something with it, that’s why we lose FIGHT if we leak excessively. Nobody fights in a calm, peaceful state.

The difference with successful people is that they embrace this tension, respect it, and power through their pre-defined goals with definitiveness of purpose, while living in this state of tension, to the point it becomes a habit.

Remember the time BEFORE when you started masturbating excessively? For me, it was when I was in adolescence, 17 years of age. I had watch porn and played M18 games since 9 but didn't orgasm until 17.

Until I had leaked the first time, I had no conceivable idea of masturbation and orgasm – the rush of brain activity, the apex of pleasure and physical epiphany…and even though I was already horny, being in a non-leaking state was my dominant habit at that time.

Somewhere down the road, this 1 accidental orgasm led to many, and the habit of nofap eventually got replaced by that of masturbation. You see? There was a point in time, where I was already living in this state of “tension”, but I didn’t realize it as I had been living in this state for so long (17 years), anything else felt strange and out-of-habit.

“Tension, in other words, just means you are in the process of creating an unfamiliar habit outside your comfort zone. The question is whether you want to overcome that unfamiliar habit now to make it permanent.”

This also proves that feel the “urge to leak” is completely a byproduct of your own habits, and it’s possible to feel that masturbation is out-of-habit, cause no one is born into this world with the pre-ingrained habit of masturbating.

However, some people take abstinence to the other extreme by resisting every bit of lustful thought and cutting off contact with every girl they speak to, which ironically generates more tension that it suppresses since it inhibits natural desires, which only blocks up the river, even more, only to explode once enough water accumulates.

This brings me to my final concept of the Inner Zen master, which I had conceived during my mediation practice for many years. It is similar to the concept of "counsellor" for Napolean Hill that works for me.

The Inner Zen master is a fictional character performing tai-chi (some martial arts) of the highest order of balance, technique, and gracefulness. Every thought in my mind goes through the circle of energy it generates in it’s fast-forwarded movements, and its end goal is to let every though pass through the mind as though the zen master was never there.

For example, imagine a 3D circle and the zen master kicking up wind and dust in a whirlpool of deft moves, and a thought (I visualise this as a vector) going through the center. The Zen master will gracefully caress the thought vector, directing by not touching it, contorting its body to adapt and flow with the wake, and eventually letting the thought exit – unfiltered, untouched leaving through the center leaving through the back.

The quality of calmness and zen-ness in one’s mind is the degree of which the inner zen master can contort and caress any thought that enters the mind – and let it leave undisturbed at the other end, amidst a whirlwind of thoughts and impulses.

Why I brought this up here is because the concept of the zen master is vital in dealing with sexual thoughts. Most people who have not mastered the art have sexual thoughts vectors enter their zen master circle – contorted, displaced, transformed – alongside the emotional charges that amplify the changes (such as guilt, lust, fear or shame), resulting in these thoughts rebounding back and forth within the mind, unable to leave, leading to stress and tension that fills the mind.

The technique is not to totally eradicate lustful thoughts in a law where nature supplies us with a conscious stream of thoughts all the time – but to let these thoughts go at the ease of which it came into the mind (Zen master circle).

Plus - knowing the fact that every thought ever conceived in your head can be attributed to either the voice of faith or fear has a huge implication. Every time I consciously realize a certain thought is motivated by fear, it is so much easier to respond with “that thought did not come from me, it came from the Devil” than to resist the statement upfront (lying about the statement generates more tension, which is the devil’s trick of building even more tension) or to feel guilty from judging your own thoughts, and you will know where a thought is motivated by faith or fear – from diving deep within your heart.

This is what I have to share now, I hope this has encouraged some people to find mental, spiritual answers to their masturbation and sexual habits, and I do wish to hear constructive opinions of others relating to what I just shared.

Thanks!

 

If I fap after that for few days I’m little jittery like a rat or junky I don’t like it. I remembered when I was a teen fapping just made me sleepy and it was more exciting. There are many things that drains energy from a man and masturbation is one of the biggest drainer of male energy as I observed myself and seeing posts here. Let’s stop this detrimental habit cold turkey and instead focus on the good things in life

 

I like napolean hill books ..