Advice Needed

It's not tat organ which you have to control, it's your brain which you need to control, difficult in initial phase, so initial phase best thing to do is, keep is occupied 24*7 wid some other productive work, don't give it time to think abt mo at all, if still you get free tym, try to spend tat tym in public, wid people around, bike ride, hanging out wid friends and family, don't ever stay alone when you are free.... This is how I got thru my initial phase

 

Yes, my addiction is MO more than P, too - as P is somewhat external, but M is in my body. Our members are attached, like you say. It would be like an alcoholic who has a bottle of whisky glued to his hand. P just comes along for the ride to enhance MO. In fact, during recovery, I seldom have temptations toward P - even without filters. All my struggles are with MO - which is the real dopamine producer for me.

I don't disagree with the statements that this addiction is much about the brain where the dopamine chemicals flood us with pleasure. However, I am just starting to realize that we cannot deemphasize what's between the legs either. Let's face it, if we got castrated, much (if not all) the temptations and urges in our heads would subside or vanish, right? I recently watched a documentary about sex offenders and pedophiles - and there were some general statistics that there is no guarantee of successful reintegration into society with even the best of counseling and determination (and success rates are rather slim to boot) - the deviant urges and attractions will always be there, whereas there's been an extremely high rate of successful reintegration with castration (chemical or physical). These are just facts; I don't mean to address the controversy of castration vs. counseling for sex offenders here.

My main point is that much (or all) or our urges reside or are caused by having testicles, and so I have resorted to adding a new strategy to my tool box.

I have been trying something that I find works very effectively. Way back when I first started here and was researching "blue balls" (testicular discomfort and congestion), I found that an ice pack worked for me - when placed atop the scrotum with the underwear as a cloth barrier for protection. It delivers a slow, soothing, penetrating coolness which not only numbs discomfort in the balls (one trigger that could cause relapse), but it also gets rid of wild and tempting sexual thoughts. It also helps one sleep at night, if that's a vulnerable time -- I sleep like a baby. You only need to use the ice pack from 5 to 15 minutes at a time, even. Then break, and repeat later if needed.

Anyway, I am now taking this to another level.

Hence, my experiment this round is as follows. I use the ice pack every night for 5 to 15 minutes at bedtime, whether or not I am having any problems or discomfort in either the groin area or the head area. So far, I have been finding that it's been working real well. Others I've told about this have found successful results, too. I also use the ice pack method during the day (if at home) if I am faced with a brutal temptation or a slowly encroaching one that I don't want to get too big. So far, so good. It's good to use it with tempting thought, even when you feel no urges in the groin area. Because I am still in the early stages, I still need to test this further still. One serious temptation just availed itself yesterday, and I was able to nip it with this method.

Also, an ice pack is not to be confused or equated with cold showers, the latter of which can actually have the opposite effect: causing alarm, agitation, confusion, resumed arousal, rather than calm, quiet stillness in mind and groin, peacefulness, and numbing of arousal.

If you give it a try, let me know how it goes.

 

That icepack idea sounds good. I think I might try it myself. Additionally, though, I have found success when I take a mental (and/or physical) step back and really look around myself. I basically hit the pause button long enough to think for myself instead of letting the addiction make all the decisions. You may have noticed that when you are headed toward a relapse, you feel like you want to relapse, almost like you have no control. It feels almost like a dream/nightmare. You don't want to, and you do have control. You have to remind yourself of that. This basically boils down to "just stop" because it really is that easy. Stop traveling down the wrong road and go do something else for half an hour or more. I know this is easier said than done, but it's that excuse that keeps us trapped in our addictions. We all need to wake ourselves up.

PS
I don't know if you're considering this or not, but don't go removing any members or gouging your eyes out. There are much better options available that won't leave you permanently mutilated.

 

Aside from disfigurement (LOL), I have learned and use some mind methods, like George Collin's Dialogue method, where you separate you true self from your addict subpersonality, personifying each in the mind (giving real shape to the addict, which can otherwise creep around invisible), and letting them dialogue - mostly allowing your true voice override your addict voice.