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Getting my life back

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by law3r9, Jan 23, 2016.

  1. law3r9

    law3r9 Fapstronaut

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    Hey everyone, I'm 29 years old and I have been fighting porn addiction for the past 15 years. I tried to quit for years. I used to watch porn a few times for fun, but nothing too hardcore until my early 20s when I went through a major breakup and was depressed for awhile. I began watching porn daily anytime I was alone or felt depressed or bored. I isolated myself a lot from family and friends.
    I've convinced myself that watching porn or masturbating a few times a week wouldn't harm me in any way and for awhile that my excuse. I know it's not okay.
    It's affected every aspect of my life, I have no more passion for writing which I used to be really good at, nor my IT career, I have no girlfriend and basically no life.
    Every relationship I start seems to be based on my need for sex and usually they only last a few months.
    I completed my masters a few months back and I realized I have been self-sabotaging myself with every job offer or opportunity that comes my way and I don't understand why. I used to be more ambitious and serious about the things I wanted for myself but now it seems I settle for less and keep finding solace in porn and in masturbation anytime I am alone. I feel powerless and sometimes I don't realize what I am doing until I am done masturbating. It's gotten so bad that I literally wake up to find that I am touching myself.
    I have tried everything and even using the religious route because I can't take it anymore.
    I have relapsed so many times trying to stop my addiction but this time I'm doing this for real.
     
  2. whysoserious5a58

    whysoserious5a58 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man for sharing. I'm a newbe so I feel not really qualified to give you serious advice, but I noticed some things, that I wanna say to you. You finished your studies! So you don't have to invest time your eddicaton for now I guess. Take this new time and start something completly new. Something fun, at best in a group of new peope. Hopfully it distractes you form PMO and gives you the chance to meet new people. Not just girls, maybe you need a change in your "social envirement" if you know aht I mean. Also try not to be to hard on yourelf, I know that's pretty hard, cause I am too. But out of selfjudgement comes a negative mindset and in a negative mindset the human mind goes back to what it knows and you relapse. I wish you much strengh and even more selfforgivness.
     
  3. law3r9

    law3r9 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks brother, I agree with the change of environment. I want that and will definitely try new things out of my comfort zone. Self-forgiveness is something I would work on too. Thanks again and goodluck to you too brother in your struggle.
     
  4. Ikindaknew

    Ikindaknew Fapstronaut

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    Welcome AKROFI!
    Your career is important. Be good with what you do, being busy in a job you like is rewarding. That is one of the ways you'll feel better about yourself. Re-gain that motivation that brought you to the IT field.
     
  5. Hi I am also new to this site and feel the exact same as you do. I feel so depressed once I masturbated. I'm glad to see there are other people out there with the same problems and struggles as me. Best of luck:)
     
  6. law3r9

    law3r9 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks bro, you're right on that, I want to get back to enjoying going to work and solving problems. I've been applying for jobs and preparing for interviews. I appreciate the support
     
  7. law3r9

    law3r9 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks bro, it's not easy but slowly we'll get there. I'm taking things day by day. I'm 3 days in and I'm now very conscious whenever I see a trigger. I'm also keeping a journal as suggested in one of the forum posts and it helps me document and see my progress.Best of luck to you too.
     
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  8. law3r9

    law3r9 Fapstronaut

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    So it's been a week and I feel in control. I've been volunteering my time at a school while searching for jobs. I'm a lot more aware of myself and I'm completely avoiding any thing that would arouse or lead me into negative thoughts and subsequently masturbation. The article below has been of great help. I know I will beat this addiction!
    http://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/my-top-tips-for-leaving-pmo-behind.35201/
     
  9. whysoserious5a58

    whysoserious5a58 Fapstronaut

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    Sounds like a good plan to me :) keep that good work up and stay focuesed. also thx for the arcticle, I found it very helpfull too.
     

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