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Do you love yourself?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Nightcrawler15, Feb 2, 2016.

  1. Nightcrawler15

    Nightcrawler15 Fapstronaut

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    I recently watched the 'Hungry for change' documentary. It was really moving.

    It shed some light on addictive behaviors which drive us to eat unhealthy foods and in turn make us obese. I thought this applies to fapping too.

    These are the lessons I learnt in short -

    1. Visualization - "Visualization is a way to talk to your subconscious".

    Spend 5 minutes visualizing the good rather than the bad. Visualize on gratitude for a while everyday for 30 days and see the changes. I have unknowingly done this in college.

    2. Unconditional love gives strength - Endless discussions go here on being strong and holding off your urges by pushing yourself. But ask yourself this, how did you learn to gain strength since you were born. You gained strength from love - love of your father and mother. So if you don't unconditionally love yourself, you will never be strong.

    Stick a note on your bathroom mirror saying "I love myself unconditionally". And you'll notice the effects within a month.

    Another way to do this one is to express gratitude. When you remember the good things, you love yourself. So you can do this too.

    I am certainly going to try both of these things. Hope it changes your life in some way too.

    Adios!
     
  2. mstevens

    mstevens Guest

    I used to be super depressed all the time, and realized how visualization made a major impact on my self-perception. I used to think, "Why am I so weak?" Without realizing thinking so was me admitting my weakness. Being able to love others, starts by learning to love yourself. Great writing, I appreciate this.

    Unconditional love is huge...and really, truly difficult. I find a lot of depression issues, especially regarding this issue is because we have learned to hate what we were. But that is it, past tense. We were, what we watched. But that is over. Accept the future and proceed in victory.

    @Nightcrawler15: I do have a challenge for you though: Your signature says "Breaking the chains", I would recommend updating to "Broke the chains", live in that victory!
     
    Ameeet and Nightcrawler15 like this.
  3. Nightcrawler15

    Nightcrawler15 Fapstronaut

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    @mstevens I'm still fighting for that challenge everyday. And hope to make it through soon! It's not easy but totally worth it.
     
  4. IGY

    IGY Guest

    @Nightcrawler15. This is a nice idea: having unconditional love for oneself. But I've never had such love for myself. In fact, I struggle to love myself at all - even conditionally! :( In my experience things I pin up cease to register after a few days because you get so used to seeing them. So, is it really sagacious to tell yourself that you do something you do not do for a whole month. :confused: I am not good at visualising things either, so techniques requiring visualisation do not work for me. Sorry.
     
    Nightcrawler15 likes this.
  5. Nightcrawler15

    Nightcrawler15 Fapstronaut

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    I'd suggest adopting different strategies if these don't work for you. The thing is that you sub-consciously don't love yourself. But having dug topics like intention-manifestation, I am saying that just set out an intention.

    Here is what you need to do:

    Just spend 1 hour as ME time. This is the time only you become important. All your responsibilities or worries will take a backseat when you simply intend to do so.

    Simply say to yourself, I intend to spend this time peacefully.
    Let that time unfold. You might even feel uncomfortable/irritated in between, but let it flow.

    Notice how you talk to yourself before doing the 1 hour ME time. Don't be too hard. My point is if you're weak, set out an intention to be strong. I strongly believe intentions have tremendous power.

    I used the visualization technique today and it served me very well. I worked double the time I worked yesterday.

    Just be open enough to try it. And if you don't like it, there are a zillion ideas out there.

    Exercise, meditation, running, small goals, talking, journaling, walking, having pets (yes it reduces depression), being a giver, showing gratitude, writing thank you notes etc.

    Here is a list of solutions that have worked for most people.

    http://curetogether.com/depression/ig/treatment-effectiveness-vs-popularity

    Moreover, always take time to pause and reflect. Don't hasten through your days. Sit for 5 minutes and ponder on how you feel and what your spirit says to you.

    Make sure to change yourself gradually. Set 1 small goal and reward yourself.

    I could go on and on.

    Life is short man. Make it count!
     
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2016
  6. Nightcrawler15

    Nightcrawler15 Fapstronaut

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    I found another strategy which should help everyone!

    After you end your day and know that you've made it without fapping, just take 5-10 minutes to acknowledge your victory and celebrate. Do whatever comes to your mind. Dance if you want. Sing loudly. This is very essential. Here is why!

    Once you celebrate after not fapping, it will register as a reward in your brain. Earlier the reward came from fapping, but now a superior reward comes from not fapping. You are literally rewiring your brain using this strategy.

    So often we hold it off for one day only to do it again the next. Will power comes if you feel good inside. Celebrate, feel good, and feel the strength next day!

    Cheers.
     

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