Why won't he stop?

Your intuition is correct. This addiction is so much worse then the public cares to acknowledge and is deadly poison to any relationship. Yourbrainonporn.com has a main video on the right side that offers the science behind this addiction. The fact that he can't quit has nothing to do with how much he loves you and everything to do with misinformation and lack of education from a young age, and extremely high levels of dopamine hitting the brain.
He'll also need, no matter what, a long period of abstinence and chastity for several months to give the brain a chance to heal from the damage he's been inflicting on himself for years.
This decision is his to make alone. You can not force it on him and you should not compromise your own standards.

 

Unfortunately there is not much you can do to fix this. If your partner has an addiction, then he needs to see it is a problem and take steps to address it. Has he admitted it is a problem or is he just saying he will stop to appease you?

I"m sorry that you are going through this. Being a partner of an addict brings an enormous amount of heartache. It is an awful thing to go through and it does a lot of damage to you and the relationship. There are a number of journals here by partners that you should take a look at - most can be found in either the relationship or women section. You should also look at some of the journals of addict so you can see it from the 'other side'. As @AlmostRuined suggested, the yourbrainonporn website has videos and articles on porn addiction. Start researching and learning more about what is happening and what to expect. It will help you make informed choices.

I wish you all the best. TW

 

Hi * hugs* You can read my journal in woman .. Not only was my ex fiance watching porn he used it to hurt me rub his fondness of it in my face once I confronted him .. This addiction is worse than any I have seen

 

If he is only watching every 2 weeks is it causing a wedge in the bedroom or do you both have good relations there ?
@AlmostRuined
Gave you great advice .. I wish you the all the best !

 

Please don't cry. I know how much you feel sad for him, but don't let that affect your self-esteem.
This video is a must :



Also, read more about porn addiction here : YourBrainOnPorn.com
Remember, the decision HAS to come from him, this shit requires full commitment.

Good luck.

 

Hey

Some positive stuff for you.

Since seeing the problem and being willing to change my life and our relationship has got better.

I started to get better in Jan 2014 after trying an SA meeting I then went to SLAA. Some of that resonated enough with me to get me going on the road to getting better.

I also do therapy sessions every two weeks and attend CODA. I journal and speak to people and try to contribute on here to give back to those who have helped me.

Being honest is important and sharing how he is feeling too. You are a partnership and he doesn't have to hide anymore.

After 14 years of alcoholism, codependency and sex addiction our life together now is better than it ever has been.

I'm not perfect, I still slip once in a while and can be grumpy and snappy when tired and a little intolerant but I am not a saint but this is the best and happiest I have felt and that runs off in our life.

 

@nevergoodenough
I completely understand how you feel .. Once I stopped being intimate with my ex he was non stop onto porn .. not even time to leave the computer to eat .. hours upon hours he would just stay and not even notice I was alive You're not alone we all are hurt by these behaviours ..